THE BITE COMMENTARY #18 – The Wrestling ReCap

So we’ve spent a whole month (June) not talking about wrestling… hence the reason why I didn’t specify the name of that extreme television program that aired on SciFi in 2006 (and also because it’s no longer around, so… oops, I guess). But now that that moratorium has come to an end, we might as well catch up on everything that has happened since the last time we touched wrestling, which would have been around the time of the post-PPV edition of Dynamite back in May.

For long time visitors of this web venture that has spanned multiple services over the course two and a half decades, consider this a sort of return to the old school format that this Bite commentary used to adopt before its first retirement in 2012. Hell, those who remember the short-lived Wrestling Rants of 2002 might see this as equally at home.

Believe me when I say that we’re going to have fun with a lot of these things.

Continue reading “THE BITE COMMENTARY #18 – The Wrestling ReCap”

TNA Head Throws Fit At World Cup Game Booked Against Impact Tapings

Months after throwing a fit over an episode of AEW’s Collision program airing on a Thursday opposite Impact due to NHL Playoff scheduling conflicts, TNA president and all-around corporate stooge Carlos Silva once again threw a temper tantrum when Impact ratings went in the toilet going up against a World Cup game.

Silva, a scrawny little man known for wearing his little TNA cap that he bought at a thrift store for ten cents, railed against FIFA for purposely scheduling and sabotaging Impact’s ratings growth. He would then proceed to ban any talent or employee under contract with TNA to watch or mention World Cup games until the end of time. This move has proven to be unpopular among the company, with morale cratering to all-time lows, especially after the departure of significant personnel.

As was the case with the AEW “invasion” – his term, not ours – Silva defended the ban and positioned it as protecting the interests of TNA. When it was pointed out that partner TKO was actively selling FIFA-themed WWE championship belts, however, Silva quickly reversed his stance and dropped the ban.

“Ban? What ban?” he would be heard saying. “You must have misheard me.”

No word on whether Silva decides to throw a fit should Major League Baseball decide to air a baseball game against Impact and decree baseball stadiums off limits for future TNA event bookings.

COMIC REVIEW – Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (2026) #1

I would have added the usual comic review banner, but not right now… this will do for now. Maybe the next one…

Well, here we are. The bold new era of Boom Studios’ Power Rangers comic output comes in the form of another MMPR comic, set ten years after the team last got together and went their separate ways. Only for a new foe based on an old foe to return and tear everything down. So I finally got around to reading the first issue of this new book and… meh.

I say that not as a negative but rather with ambivalence. Because the issue doesn’t give you much, other than maybe a couple nuggets as to where the Rangers are at now, as well as an inkling of who or what this new Rita Rabiosa happens to be. It gives you the big moment, there’s an action bit, and there’s even Zord action throw in for good measure, but it’s clear that this first issue is more of a tease than a genuine first chapter. There’s more to come and that’s kind of the problem; I needed more than what they gave me. All I got was more questions. Sometimes, that’s a good thing and more than enough if you’re already sold on the premise… but when you’re NOT sold on the premise, you need a little more meat on those bones and I didn’t really get that.

Look, I like the brief interaction between the Rangers before they morph, even if the dialogue feels a bit off at times, but stilted dialogue has always been a Power Rangers thing, so that’s expected. There’s one particular development that anyone who has seen Once And Always would appreciate and I do like that inclusion here. And of course, I am rather curious about one missing member of the team… probably the first time in a long while that this particular character has been intriguing within these comics, so I give kudos on that.

But, again, there’s very little substance to be found here. I also found the artwork to be a bit… uneven. The action bits are fine, the zords are fine, but the human characters look rough and Kim looks like she just got out of bed. Again, there are questions that I hope the series will answer, but it’s mostly sizzle and no protein. Honestly, this is one of those times where I wouldn’t have minded holding off the action until the next issue – set the scene, tell us where these people are at, make it so that this scenario is as urgent as they say it is. It’s supposed to feel like a big event, but given how many “big events” Boom like to throw into these Power Rangers comics, it feels like business as usual. That’s not a good feeling to have when you’re entering this “bold, new era” of Power Rangers that feels too much like the familiar.

And if I didn’t hammer it enough times, I’m going to do so again – the new costumes still look awful. It’s not just the matter of being different; it’s the matter of these looking like bootleg figures from the international rip-off shop. The Boom record for shitty Ranger designs continues onwards, I’m afraid, and that Unlimited preview with the Strikng Tiger Hidden Bear Ranger thing isn’t any better.

It sounds like that I’ve been overly critical of this thing and that I don’t like it. Fair enough, but at the same time, I don’t dislike this enough to completely drop it. As much as I have questions and wish this first issue had done more to fill in some backstory, I do want to see how this pushes forward, which is nice considering this is from the same writer who wrote that Beyond The Grid, which is what caused me to drop that initial Boom run in the first place.

Good job, folks. You kept me around for another issue. That’s the highest praise I could give this thing right now. Let’s see if next issue does more.

Review #1338 – Sonic & Knuckles (Genesis)

I am legally required to identify this video upload as a “video review of Sonic & Knuckles for Sega Genesis.”

Because calling this “a cavalcade of technical calamities and seemingly endless hours of video capture and audio dubbing to say that any game that hosts a level as insipidly dreadful as Sandopolis should be disqualified from being deemed the greatest at anything” doesn’t quite roll off the tongue.

This was meant for yesterday as a special Sunday upload, but the fact is that a lot of stuff had to be redone before it was marginally within acceptable parameters. Honestly, if there was a better note to take a week long break on, this would be it.

Reviews will resume on July 6th.

#FuckSandopolis

The Holodeck

Holodecks in Star Trek were kind of a cool technology where I first its debut on the premiere episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. A little room that lets you simulate entire worlds as if they were real. If you wanted to visit the streets of Paris during a certain period of time or if you want to explore a foreign world… hell, maybe you wanted to play a part in your favorite novel or watch old sportsball games from the best seats, all it took was a few parameters and there you go.

All of that information procedurally generated from knowledge banks stored in computer memory. To be able to recreate real things… even real people… having them act in a fair approximation of their true personalities or perhaps even in other ways outside their known personalities.

Holodeck seems like a pretty cool technology.

Sometimes, you have to ask yourself… that shit had to come from somewhere, doesn’t it?

And then you go online and what do you see? Procedurally generated video content featuring real people doing things you normally wouldn’t see them do because they wouldn’t be doing these things. We tend to frown on this things for various reasons, but what if it goes a step further and it becomes integrated in virtual reality? What if we improve that to a point where virtual reality can become actual reality? Instead of interacting with these things from a helmet or visor, we interact with these things in holographic form…

Like I said, that holodeck tech had to start somewhere.

Seemed like a fun thing back in the day… do we feel the same way now?

Just a random thought.

Back To The Well…

So there’s going to be another Ocarina Of Time remake.

I say “another” remake because the game was already remade for the handheld 3DS years ago… but that could easily be seen a more of a substantial upgrade rather than a true remake of the N64 original.

But no, Switch 2 owners have a full-blown remake coming their way. Shut up and take my money? For some people… maybe. For others, though?

Have we really gotten to that point? The point where the biggest thing to look forward to on Nintendo’s newest platform is a remake of a game from thirty years ago. We already got one in the form of StarFox (itself a remake of StarFox 64, which, in turn, is a remake of the SNES original – try and not get my mind blown at that non-revelation) and now it looks like the first 3D Zelda is getting its own fancy remake. And that was the headline main event announcement of that early-June direct. No new experiences. No new games. Just reheated left overs covered up with some fresh white rice to hide all the creekiness.

Meanwhile, I’m still waiting for a proper Zelda 3 to come along. And no, A Link To The Past doesn’t count, despite claims to the contrary.

I hate to rail on Nintendo for this sort of deal and clearly, they’re not the only ones playing into nostalgia – Xbox is reheating their own classics for the next generation (or whatever generation they’re in – who even knows with them these days?) – but this shouldn’t be the thing you use to sell consoles. I can already play Ocarina of Time on my Switch via Nintendo Classics. Hell, I can play Ocarina Of Time on a variety of Nintendo platforms. Do we really need another one? Has that game ruined this series enough?

Oops… I said the quiet part loud, didn’t I?

Well… the dog did all the talking for me. You’ll have to wait a little while longer before I get around to rocking THAT particular boat.

Review #1337 – Sonic The Hedgehog 3 (Genesis)

Raise the flame shields, kids. We’re diving into the holy cash cow of 2D Sonic games… or was that Sonic CD? Who even knows anymore?

Before anyone asks, yes, there is a means of getting vintage Sonic & Knuckles Collection from 1997 running on modern Windows. There’s also a thing that creates your own save files so that you don’t have to. These are required tools that saved me a lot of anguish for what are essentially throwaway video fodder.

Perhaps some day [REDACTED] will get their time in the sun. For now… the Sonic 3 video review. Sonic & Knuckles video coming out tomorrow night… maybe earlier if you’re lucky.

Then I’m off.

Rewatch #1200 Before #1337 Hits

Yes, you’ve already seen this before. But let’s remind people that on this day last year, after over 500 reviews since we did the first game, we finally reviewed Sonic The Hedgehog 2 on Sega Genesis. Honestly, anything more at this point should have been scrubbed from memory, but now that I’ve played more than enough Sonic The Hedgehog to last a lifetime…

I’m giving things away, aren’t I?

Anyway, you can scroll down and watch the Sonic CD review if you want, but I might do a replay of that in a little bit. In the meantime, Sonic 3 should be up later tonight while Sonic & Knuckles is up tomorrow night. After that, no new video until next Sunday.