Happy Review A Bad Game Day… here are some bad games.

August 8th is the traditional Review A Bad Game day here on the blog space. Originally an event established by the now defunct website, 1 More Castle, I decided to adopt the practice and make it a(n almost) yearly endeavor to review a bad game around this time.

Yesterday, we looked at My Hero for Master System, a horrible game based on an arcade title that no one should play… but for those who want to sample some other titles reviewed for the occasion over the years, here’s a partial list of video links:

Review #111 – Fire Fly (Atari 2600)
One of the Mythicon tragedies, first discovered via Classic Game Room and one of those games that didn’t get a whole lot of mentioned at the time. I figured, “Why not?” And then I played it. That’s why not.

Review #279 – WCW Backstage Assault (PlayStation)
One of those “easy targets” that seems like low-hanging fruit… but considering how rubbish the entire concept is – a wrestling game without the wrestling ring – and how poorly executed it was, Backstage Assault more than earns its notoriety.

Review #391 – Street Fighter (MS-DOS)
For clarity, this was posted on August 3rd and kicked off a week of reviews that ended with Street Fighter II, which is not a bad game. Still, it’s a DOS port of an arcade title from the early 90s when DOS efforts in such things were… not good, to put it mildly.

Review #501 – Race Drivin’ (Super NES)
Try as you might; you will never find a stronger case of “Genesis Does What Nintendon’t” than this absolutely atrocious SNES port of Atari Games’ arcade driver. Thankfully, I had not played the Game Boy version yet because that would have soured things even more for me.

Review #548 – German Fortress 3D (PC)
Take some sprites from the other, more famous and infinitely superior Wolfenstein 3D, recolor them, and drop them in an utterly worthless 3D engine with little to no care applied before dropping it on Steam to sell for a few bucks.

Review #691 – Instruments Of Chaos Starring Young Indiana Jones (Genesis)
Someone out there thought that the Sega Genesis deserved a good Indiana Jones game on their console… that someone is probably still waiting.

Review #747 – Capcom Fighting Evolution (Xbox)
All things considered, this is probably the best playing title on this list of sad sacks. Still, something that feels like a MUGEN hackjob and sold for almost full price is a disservice to Capcom’s fighting legacy.

Review #811 – X-Men: Mutant Academy (Game Boy Color)
I would like to remind people that this came from the same folks who managed a solid conversion of Street Fighter Alpha onto the GBC… and then this became a thing.

Review #895 – Sonic The Hedgehog Genesis (Game Boy Advance)
Don’t worry, Sonic. My 15th birthday was also kind of shite, too.

Review #1089 – Platoon (NES)
Some people actually like this game for some reason, but it’s never been anything more than a poorly conceived mess. And I’ll say that much about the computer version this is based on, too.

And finally…

Review #1353 – My Hero (Master System)
A dreadful game. By all accounts…

Anyway, that’s some viewing material for you all. And if you want to check out all my videos on games of questionable quality, the Kusoge tab on the menu is right there for the taking. Have fun.

Review #1355 – My Hero (Master System)

Traditionally, Review A Bad Game Day – a relic of the old 1MoreCastle site that I adopted for myself – would land on August 8th… but that’s on a Saturday and I’ve better things to do on a Saturday than waste it on today’s offering. A prime example of something that doesn’t always go well on a card.

We didn’t end the week on Super Boy, which turned out better towards the back end of that series, but we do end on a bad game, so it all works out.

Review #1354 – Super Boy 4 (Master System)

It took us four games, but Super Boy finally graces Sega Mark III proper and the quality is a step up. Whether that means a good game is… oh, come on, you should know better by now.

Good news is that they stopped making Super Boy games. Bad news is we’ve still got one more bad Master System game to look at tomorrow, but at least, it’s licensed by Sega… man, and I was worried I’d have nothing for Review A Bad Game week here.

Delayed Reaction…

So a certain trailer dropped for a certain movie recently that’s coming up. A certain day of doom, apparently. I saw the trailer when I first got wind of it, which wouldn’t have been more than a day or two after it dropped. I saw it, shrugged, and moved on with my life.

However, if you want me to say something nice… that Lanterns show looks mildly interesting.

The first two teasers didn’t show you much… and that’s fine. They’re teasers; they’re supposed to tease you with something bigger, not blow their wad from the start. Nonetheless, initial reactions were mixed and people assumed the worst… and that’s without getting into potential rumors of the spoilery kind.

Then the actual trailer hits and there’s more to be excited about. There are Manhunters, there is a potential mystery, there’s Sinestro, there’s the looming specter (no pun intended) of Hal Jordan eventually being replaced by John Stewart. While the show is still largely grounded on Earth, there is promise of Green Lantern action. There needs to be. And if the show does well… maybe they lean more into the sci-fi stuff in a potential second season. Assuming they get one, of course.

So yeah… looking forward to Lanterns… Clayface, not so much… not my cup of tea, but hope it turns out well for those who are interested in this one.

Review #1353 – Super Boy III (Master System-ish)

Calling this a “Sega Master System” game is a misnomer because this entry is a strictly SG-1000 release… which would technically make this the first time we’re reviewing a game from Sega’s older console that never made it to American soil… but much like Akumajo Dracula on Sharp X68000, it’s on a console that I am never going to touch again and I am playing this on a Master System gimmick anyway, so whatever, who cares? The game still sucks… or does it?

Suicide Squad (2016) – Ten Years Later…

Suicide Squad is a strange film to pin down. You look at all the advertising for this thing – the tagline of “Worst Heroes Ever” chief among them – and some of the choice clips that they used to sell people on the movie.

It’s no secret that Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice was rather… divisive in its reception. I made no bones about my disdain at the time for the film… mostly because I didn’t think it was a good movie. Because of that divisive reception, DC shifted gears for its upcoming line up. One of the films affected would be Suicide Squad, a film that had gone through a few phases before eventually coming out in August 2016.

I shared some thoughts on the film, which you can check out here. In short, I thought the film was fine, largely enjoyable, and probably the best DC movie up to that point because of it. I haven’t seen that movie since then and things have obviously changed quite a bit. We had another Suicide Squad film a few years ago from James Gunn, which spun off the John Cena starring vehicle Peacemaker… and of course, James Gunn is currently overseeing the entire slate of DC film and television production. Clearly, he must have done something right in making something involving John Cena that didn’t suck.

And then I come back to this Suicide Squad film, which had an extended cut released some time after the theatrical run. It largely retained some of the issues I had with the movie the first time. That is to say, I could have done without the wacky editing and musical inserts, which felt deliberately tacked on and not at all a natural part of the film. The attempts at adding a more lighthearted tone to a film that was clearly intended to be much grimmer in tone… doesn’t quite sit well with me. Levity is something that should be natural in regards to certain characters – Superman, for example.

But with Suicide Squad, you kind of want that darker tone. These reprehensible people who are on a leash and under threat of literal termination via remote bomb… yeah, you want the audience to feel for these characters and their plights. They almost managed that to a point with little character moments and motivations here and there. But then we break in a music video montage that just feels out of place. People had accused DC of giving this a vibe similar to Guardians Of The Galaxy – oh, look. Another James Gunn project namedropped here… but it fits because that film was a giant success for Marvel. DC, naturally, wanted their own and shoehorned this movie to be that… which they failed because Suicide Squad isn’t designed to be that. So those attempts at lighthearted rapport and quippiness (is that a word? Who cares?) sort of stick out.

In a sense, this sort of mentality was what plagued Justice League once Zack Snyder dropped out after the death of his daughter. And full disclosure; I actually liked that movie when it came out and appreciated it for giving Henry Cavill the opportunity to actually play Superman as opposed to whatever the fuck Snyder wanted him to be. That said, I’m not sure I want to watch it nowadays given my current malaise with that style of storytelling permeating all the Disney properties.

Once again, the action scenes were on point. Yeah, a lot of it is shrouded in perpetual darkness – another complaint I have with this film, but to be fair, the movie needed that – but at the very least, they looked well choreographed and executed. The writing and the acting is pretty solid; obviously, the standout being Margot Robbie’s take on Harley Quinn, which some folks at Mattel watched and went “She’s our Barbie.” Will Smith’s Deadshot is also quite good and further testament to Smith’s acting chops – in terms of on-screen performances, not in terms of clocking Chris Rock. Hell, even some of the minor players get some moment to shine.

Again, my misgivings towards not enough being done with Katana since that was one of my favorite Outsiders… but I guess that small nugget was enough for Karen Fukuhara to get a gig with the boys. Never a bad thing in my book.

So, yeah, ten years later, Suicide Squad still holds up as a fairly entertaining movie… though its crown as the best DC movie of the bunch would eventually be claimed by the likes of Wonder Woman and Aquaman, but that was going to happen regardless. With that in mind, I do hope that David Ayer gets the chance to do the cut of the film that he always intended, much like Zack Snyder got with Justice League. If anything, I’d be more inclined to support any movement involving the realization of the Ayer cut.

But more than likely, the only Ayer cut I’ll be seeing is anything involving the similarly-named David Ayers… that zamboni driver who served as an emergency goalie in that one game in Toronto and gave that Dangle person a conniption fit.

Oh well… maybe some day…

TNA Bound For Glory 2009

Another year, another Bound For Glory PPV event, another title shot for the ICON known as Sting. Is AJ Styles the one to break the curse? Tune in and find out (or not… I really don’t care.)

I will say this right off the bat… I kinda regret watching this show for reasons that I will get into at the end of the musings.

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Ambivalently Forgetting Supergirl

Yes, it took me over a month to gather some thoughts on James Gunn’s latest contribution to the DC Universe in the form of the Craig Gillespie-helmed Supergirl. And the reason for that was because it took me a while to get around to seeing this thing in theaters.

What happened was that a friend had some tickets that they got on special and invited me along with a couple others in exchange for food and drink (elsewhere; movie goods are too bloody expensive for what little you get these days.) I figured why not and then we went and saw the film… and then we promptly forgot about it.

And that is not a good sign when this is supposed to be one of your tentpole features in your whole Gods And Monsters story arc that may or may not get a Chapter Two.

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