Category: Wrestling Musings

All posts related to pro rasslin’ that isn’t covering specific shows or events.

Whose Side Is He On?

On July 7th, 1996, former WWF Champion and beloved wrestling superhero Hulk Hogan did the unthinkable and turned his back on the fans, aligning with the invading Outsiders at the Bash At The Beach. He then proceeded to cut a scathing promo telling the fans who turned their backs on him to stick it and declare his new alliance with Scott Hall and Kevin Nash to be the New World Organization Order of professional wrestling, brother.

So 30 years ago, we had the birth of the nWo. A lot of people want to make a big deal of Austin 3:16 being uttered for the first time last month, but it took a while for the Stone Cold train to really get rolling and only then would that phrase grace a T-Shirt that would outsell everything else on the market.

But before that T-Shirt came to pass, there was the nWo.

And the nWo was a big deal. Even someone like me who only had the most peripheral exposure to wrestling knew what an nWo was. It was the first thing I heard most about. It was the first shirt that I’ve seen most kids wear back in the day. And it was pretty much the talk of the town until Steve Austin REALLY started getting big the following year… then everyone was talking about Stone Stunners and stuff like that.

There has been some debate as to whether Bobby Heenan (who was doing color commentary for the show) spoiled the Hogan turn when he openly asked “Whose side is he on?” in regards to Hogan showing up to seemingly save the day during the main event. Some folks argue that the line gave away the turn and in a way, I could almost see it. It’s a bit of a tell, a hint of doubt. You don’t want anyone to doubt Hogan. And had it been any of the other commentators, then yeah, I’d say it would be a giveaway because why would they doubt Hogan as anything but the paragon of virtue?

You know who have cause to doubt Hogan?

Bobby Heenan.

Anyone who has watched Hulk Hogan in WWF or even in WCW knew that there was one dissenting voice who rallied against everything Hogan did. During the height of the Rock N Wrestling era, it was Jesse Venture. In the 90s, it was Bobby Heenan. The heel announcer who rooted for the bad guys and poked fun at the good guys. And there was no good guy that Heenan had a hate boner for than Hulk Hogan… and for good reason. He managed some top challengers to Hogan’s WWF title, including King Kong Bundy and Andre The Giant. Even back in the AWA days, Heenan was seconding reigning champion Nick Bockwinkel during his defenses against a young upstart challenger named – you guessed it – Hulk Hogan.

Bobby Heenan has every reason to doubt Hogan. He doesn’t like the guy. He doesn’t trust the guy. Him not being completely on board with him saving the day, I can buy that. Even Dusty Rhodes reacted incredulously at the comment, shutting Heenan down. Heenan questioning Hogan based on their past history? Yeah, that’s not a tell. That’s a perfectly logical reaction.

So in recent years, WWE edited the line out from replays and Heenan is now silent during the whole deal. So now that we fixed the offending line, everything is a-okay and the turn is more of a surprise, right?

Well, of course, it isn’t.

First off, deleting a line doesn’t preserve the surprise. It makes it more obvious that something isn’t up. Heenan being silent is like… “Hey, he knows more than he’s letting on.” THAT’s more of a tell than anything.

And also… what’s the point of removing a line to preserve a turn that everyone knows is coming because it happened THIRTY FUCKING YEARS AGO?

It’s one thing to fix a flubbed move during a pre-tape or a naughty bit during a replay… but one line removed because… reasons? Dude, now you’ve made it more obvious. And for what? A clip that most people aren’t going to see in their entirety anyway? Does it really matter whether that line is kept?

Anyway, what does it matter? I still have the show on VHS. It still works. Maybe one day, I transfer it to DVD and then to media box.

Lots of maybe one days…

Later.

Ramblemania 42… or not

“Hey, Dave. Why is there a picture of Mark Bussler of Classic Game Room in your banner about Wrestlemania? And why does it say that you really don’t care?”

I can hear you asking that right now… and I’ll be more than happy to answer that question. The image of Mark – a screenshot taken from one of his old Xbox 360 videos where he addresses the question of whether he prefers the Xbox 360 or the competing PS3 by simply saying “I really don’t care.” The reason that quote is on the banner rather than the name of the event is because… I really don’t care.

Full disclosure: I whipped up the banner in January in the event that I would not want to watch the Mania show from Saudi next year… but then I figured that the possibility would exist that I might skip out on this year’s Mania as well. The build hadn’t sold me on the show, the hype was non-existent, and even the few buddies who still followed the product hardcore were less than keen on it. And when Wrestlemania came and went, I spent night 1 doing a stream and night 2 was spent doing some recovery work.

In other words, I kept busy doing other stuff.

Besides the lackluster build, Netflix employed another price hike… presumably their way of recouping whatever feuds they could for their failed attempt at acquiring WB Discovery or whatever other reason you want to come up with. I’d imagine it’s a price hike to bring in some more “original” content that I’m probably going to ignore. At this point, what’s there for me to watch? Never been much of a Stranger Things guy. Cobra Kai’s long done. And I haven’t really been following much of the WWE product since John Cena’s last match. Maybe a couple TNA shows and the stretch of AEW shows between the Dynasty and Double Or Nothing PPV events. Beyond that, all I’ve been watching this year, for the most part, were old WCW and TNA shows… in particular, I’ve been trying to catch up on the Bound For Glory shows so I can give that line a similar run to the Ramblemania stuff. It might not be all good, but it’s at least interesting.

Honestly, to tell you the truth, I’m not sure when or if I’m going resub with Netflix, but there has to be something truly worthwhile for me to get back on board because right now, the pickings are slim and there’s not enough of a hook for me to get on board. The ultimate irony is that when Netflix was cheaper about a decade or so, there was more content worth my while.

Nowadays, however? Pfft…

Strangely enough, if someone were to click on the Ramblemania tab on the main menu, this is probably going to be the first entry that pops up. Not an inspiring first impression if you’ve never been to this blog before and you want to look back at Wrestlemania through the years. But I’d like to think that, above all else, Ramblemania (both this and the original set from 2012 and up) could be considered a historical document of sorts. You can check out each entry and see what’s changed from the last show as well as what hasn’t. But more than anything, you can sort of gauge my reactions in watching these shows. How I’ve enjoyed the early ones, rolled my eyes at some of the bad ones, got really excited for the fun ones, and then in recent years, it’s just like… yeah, here’s another one.

That’s less prevalent with the Rewind run because those were done in a similar fashion to the upcoming string of Bound For Glory musings starting next week; I watch a show, post a few comments and move on to the next. And all of that was done in a span of a couple months – try to fit in one a day whenever I could. So my reactions aren’t quite as organic, but I’d like to think that the notes are more along those same lines. And so you’ve got a series of Ramblemania posts below this one that have covered looked back on every Wrestlemania before this one… and I do implore you to read those if you haven’t. Just so you can see that I actually can enjoy this WWE product once upon a time.

And so, for anyone wondering when the next Ramblemania is going to pop up… the real answer is I don’t know, but my advice on the matter?

Don’t hold your breath.

THE BITE COMMENTARY #18 – The Wrestling ReCap

So we’ve spent a whole month (June) not talking about wrestling… hence the reason why I didn’t specify the name of that extreme television program that aired on SciFi in 2006 (and also because it’s no longer around, so… oops, I guess). But now that that moratorium has come to an end, we might as well catch up on everything that has happened since the last time we touched wrestling, which would have been around the time of the post-PPV edition of Dynamite back in May.

For long time visitors of this web venture that has spanned multiple services over the course two and a half decades, consider this a sort of return to the old school format that this Bite commentary used to adopt before its first retirement in 2012. Hell, those who remember the short-lived Wrestling Rants of 2002 might see this as equally at home.

Believe me when I say that we’re going to have fun with a lot of these things.

Continue reading “THE BITE COMMENTARY #18 – The Wrestling ReCap”

TNA Head Throws Fit At World Cup Game Booked Against Impact Tapings

Months after throwing a fit over an episode of AEW’s Collision program airing on a Thursday opposite Impact due to NHL Playoff scheduling conflicts, TNA president and all-around corporate stooge Carlos Silva once again threw a temper tantrum when Impact ratings went in the toilet going up against a World Cup game.

Silva, a scrawny little man known for wearing his little TNA cap that he bought at a thrift store for ten cents, railed against FIFA for purposely scheduling and sabotaging Impact’s ratings growth. He would then proceed to ban any talent or employee under contract with TNA to watch or mention World Cup games until the end of time. This move has proven to be unpopular among the company, with morale cratering to all-time lows, especially after the departure of significant personnel.

As was the case with the AEW “invasion” – his term, not ours – Silva defended the ban and positioned it as protecting the interests of TNA. When it was pointed out that partner TKO was actively selling FIFA-themed WWE championship belts, however, Silva quickly reversed his stance and dropped the ban.

“Ban? What ban?” he would be heard saying. “You must have misheard me.”

No word on whether Silva decides to throw a fit should Major League Baseball decide to air a baseball game against Impact and decree baseball stadiums off limits for future TNA event bookings.

Eh…

Almost didn’t do a post today, but I assure you it’s nothing serious. Just been busy with some stuff. Notably the week’s offerings and other real life things.

Will be going to a friend’s place for a get-together tomorrow, where we’ll be watching a replay of tonight’s PPV with some other folks. Said friend spent their day watching the latest product from Disney that came out on Friday and shared their regret in doing so. I offered to bring donuts from Timmy’s to soften the blow. I might end up getting Krispy Kremes from Costco instead.

Upload times for the videos will be uneven, but I’d imagine it’ll be the usual time for most of them. Otherwise, it’ll be later than usual for some. Lots of last-minute checking and rendering to see if it all fits well and if no glitches pass through. After that, it should be an interesting ride of sorts.

Catch you all later.

I Asked ChatGPT to Book Asuka’s Last Match… Against GUNTHER

WWE can have this one for free, by the way. It’s AI-generated, which they love – and it involves GUNTHER continuing his gimmick of having people’s last matches and then “retiring” them. And then if people shit on this thing, you can have McSon-In-Law tell them to fuck off and be fans… or have Nick Khan call them the vocal minority… or maybe drive up more subscriptions to hear Uncle Dave stammer about how this is the worst affront to a Japanese wrestler since Okada stubbed his toe or something.

I don’t know. I didn’t make this up – I just asked a question and some gimmick gave me an answer that thoroughly entertained me… which means the people who actually get PAID to throw this creative together are doing a worse off job than a common AI program that anyone can access. I’m not advocating for AI to completely book wrestling shows anytime soon, but at this point, it’s difficult to argue with results.

Anyway, I give you Asuka vs. GUNTHER in Asuka’s Last Match by ChatGPT. Enjoy and be afraid.

Continue reading “I Asked ChatGPT to Book Asuka’s Last Match… Against GUNTHER”

You’re Jobbing Asuka To GUNTHER, Aren’t You?

I can see it now.

Goldberg Complains About “Some Japanese Girl” Getting Better Send Off Than He Did.

Also, that big announcement John Cena teased is for another competition that nobody is going to care, but are going to pretend they do because the algorithm requires engagement… and Dauhausen’s mystery partner turned out to be a Minihausen.

I thought I told you clowns not to do mystery gimmicks anymore. They’re always disappointing and you suck at them.

This is where I remind people that I don’t have a Netflix subscription and have no such inclination to get one any time soon.

But, hey, that Ronda/Gina thing is next week, isn’t it? Maybe that’ll be a big hit or something… right?

Moving right along…

Can We Fire Logan Paul?

Local hero Joe Hendry asking the hard questions… and if not, then why not?

Seriously, though, good for Joe. Glad to see WWE lean into his musical talents and letting him do these music videos. That’s what got him into the dance. Lean into it. Use it. It’s a rare gift. In a time of uncertainty, we could all use a little levity.

Wishing that man all the success in the world.

I still believe…

Oh, and Danhausen trolling Miz is fun, too…

Good for him, I guess…