Category: Star Wars Musings

All posts relating to the Star Wars franchsise.

Attack Of The Clones… Every Bit As Bad As I Remember It

Twenty years ago, on this very day, the fifth Star Wars film and the second episode of the Star Wars Prequel trilogy, Star Wars: Episode II – Attack Of The Clones, was released in theatres worldwide. As the second chapter of the prequels, it continued the story of Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi and his young padawan Anakin Skywalker, who are charged with the mission of protecting the young Senator and former Queen Amidala from assassins, all the while trying to uncover the mystery of a clone army created in Kamino. The movie raked in about $650 million in the box office, but the reaction has been decided mixed.

Over the years, I have made no secret about considering Attack Of The Clones to be the absolute worst Star Wars movie ever made. I have held this belief since the day it premiered when I first saw it in theatres with my older brother and a bunch of his buddies, and even with the release of the recent films – which I tend to forget exist, coincidentally enough – it neatly lines that proverbial bottom of the Star Wars bottle. Now, it’s entirely possible that I may have been a bit harsh and maybe a fresh viewing through new eyes and on the eve of its twentieth year of existence, I may have gotten a new appreciation for this often misunderstood film.

So I pulled out the Blu-Ray disc that I had laying around, popped into my Blu-Ray player, resisted the urge to dive into the extras, and I watched Attack Of The Clones for the first time in years. And you know, I had the DVD release, I popped that into my DVD player, I kicked back and watch this film for the first time in years… and you know how some people would revisit something that they hadn’t touched in years because they had a low opinion of it and then they would go “Well, this isn’t as bad I remember it.”

Well, if the title isn’t much of a clue, then I give you my utmost assurance that no such thoughts came to mind after my viewing of Attack Of The Clones. It is, for all intents and purposes, every bit as bad as I remember it.

Continue reading “Attack Of The Clones… Every Bit As Bad As I Remember It”

The Bore Of Boba Fett

You know, one of these days, I’m going to enjoy the new Star Wars… and not in an ironic way. For example, my favorite part of The Mandalorian is when the Scout Trooper punches Baby Yoda in the face. That was the best piece of Star Wars television I’ve seen. Also, my favorite scene in the newer Star Wars movies is the last third of Rogue One, where all the main heroes die and then Darth Vader kills a bunch of Rebels as they escape for a new hope.

Actually, you know what? I tell a bit of a lie; The Mandalorian was, for better or worse, one of the better pieces of Star Wars visual media that has been produced since the changeover in ownership to Disney. And despite my favorite part being Baby Yoda being punched in the face, I actually don’t mind the little guy. He and Mando (or Din) have a good relationship and I’m happy to see that they were reunited at the end of the Boba Fett show.

Oh yeah, we’re supposed to talk about The Book Of Boba Fett.

Except… the show is so goddamned boring. Basically, it’s like the last bunch of Star Wars movies; a whole lot of nothing happens throughout several episodes. In fact, the only time where things seemed to be picking up is when they bring back the Mandalorian to help boost up interest in this sagging show. The idea of an older Boba Fett trying to be a nicer ganglord and fighting all these other ganglords or whatever… good lord, I never thought I’d find something that put me to sleep faster than the average 20-minute HHH promo, but this might take the fucking cake.

The only time I had a vested interest in what the show offered was when ol’ Mando showed up and we were following along his adventures. And then we see a bit of the Jedi planet where Baby Yoda is being trained by a CG Luke Skywalker… before he decides to fuck off and join up with Mando again. Hell, my favorite moment in the whole show is when Mando is building his new ship; essentially a recycled Naboo starfighter, but made to look cooler and less lame. I liked that show and giving Mando a starfighter as opposed to another gunship is an inspired choice.

Maybe it’s just me not sold on the concept or maybe it’s just me hoping for more of Mando, but with Boba. Or maybe this Star Wars stuff ain’t for me. And that’s fine. If they do another season of Mando, I’ll check that out then, but until then… no buys for the book of Boba.

Why The Current Star Wars: Battlefront Games Don't Appeal To Me

Every once in a while, I’ll go on Steam and I’ll check the games that are on sale. Every now and then, one game in particular catches my eye.

Star Wars Battlefront II.

The new one.

The one that was once riddled with lootboxes and paid content that everyone threw a fit and EA lost money, forcing them to restructure the game considerably so that you’re less reliant on paid DLC and you can just stick with the basic package. Nowadays, I hear it’s pretty good and that the current version has atoned and made up for the mistakes it’s made.

Every time this pops up on sale, I give it a brief thought and I pass.

Sometime ago, this happened and I ask myself “why?” Why am I not jumping at the chance to grab this once former dumpster fire while it’s nice and cheap.

I supposed part of the reason is that I have the old Battlefront games and I enjoy those enough that they’re all the Star Wars Battlefront that I would ever need… even the gimped PSP games have their moment to shine. Another part could because despite sharing the same name, it’s not quite the same game that I’ve played. It looks similar, but it also looks similar to all those other multiplayer focused first-person shooters that I don’t particularly care for today.

So I skipped this one… again. And I’d imagine I’ll skip it again.

Why am I bringing this up? To be honest with you, I’m not quite sure. I suppose I wanted something to post up here and this is the only thing that really pops to mind. All the best to those who enjoy the game and such. But I have a feeling this isn’t for me.

I really should give that Squadrons game another shot, though.

Either that, or go back to TIE Fighter.

Later.

The “Rise” of Skywalker… Oy

So, it’s been a while since we touched on Star Wars, hasn’t it?

Assuming you skip out on any video reviews I might have uploaded along the way, I think I might’ve touched on anything related to the long-running franchise only a handful of times in the past year. And yes, outside of the video games that I’ve gotten along the way, I have not touched much of Star Wars as of late. But since we’re talking about Star Wars today, I’d imagine most people would’ve expected something on the Mandalorian or one of the new upcoming series or maybe there’s a new video game that I’m not playing and choosing to ignore.

Instead, I’m going to talk about The “Rise” Of Skywalker.

Note the quotations around the word “rise” and that one image of Mark Hamill looking stern – the same one used for my piece of The Last Jedi a couple years back – and think about that for a couple seconds before realizing that you have me all figured out. Then question where you’re resigned with that thought and are left to either move on to something or click the break to learn more and perhaps be amazed by what the actual thought process is.

Ready to go?

Continue reading “The “Rise” of Skywalker… Oy”

Devoid Of The Star Wars… And Not Missing It

So, I will offer a bit of a nugget for you folks; outside of the first season of Mandalorian, I have not watched a single bit of Star Wars film since my last viewing of the last Star Wars movie, which I’d imagine was a year or so ago.

I’ve not watched the original films, nor the prequels, none of the spin-off films, and especially none of the sequels. I’ve got some of them on VHS, DVD, and Blu-Ray. They’re all on my iTunes/Apple TV library thing, so I can watch them at any time, but I’m just not tempted to go back and revisit these films. Even the second season of Mando has been a complete afterthought.
I did play a bit of Squadrons… and then I went back to TIE Fighter… but that’s about it.
This isn’t the first time that I’ve had long stretches of not touching anything Star Wars; it’s one of those things that comes and goes. Some of the stuff I do re-watch tends to be more easily accessible via Netflix or one of those things. Hell, I’d watch more stuff off the Impact Plus thing when I was still subscribed to it than I do Star Wars. But eventually, I’d revisit it, have some fun with it, and move on to something else… or maybe I’ll adopt a bit of a Star Wars kick and try some other stuff, whether it’d be games, novels, or whatever the case may be.
However, the thought occurred to me as of late that I haven’t touched a single bit of Star Wars… and what’s more odd is that I don’t miss it.
Actually, thinking about it, there used to be a time when the idea of new Star Wars was exciting and the prospect of new films every year was going to be something worthwhile… and then we saw the movies they put out and…
I guess that’s why I don’t miss Star Wars these days. The last trilogy left such a bad taste in my mouth that when I realize how long it’s been since I last touched a Star Wars thing, I don’t actually miss it. If anything, I realize how much better I am without it than with it.
So did the sequels ruin Star Wars for me? Or is it the toxic fanbase? Or is it Twitter being occupied by dumb shits?
Some day, I’ll find the answers to these questions and get back to you on it.

Fodder For A Future Gimmick

Limited Run Games, purveyors of limited run (no pun intended) overpriced physical packages just released their take on the X-Wing and TIE Fighter physical packages in both “standard” action-figure like backboards and a “collector’s package” that comes in a box similar to the big box PC stuff. And while I didn’t jump on board for past Star Wars gimmicks – and it wasn’t for a lack of trying – I was on board for this.

The thought occurred to pick up both the X-Wing and TIE Fighter packages, but common sense prevail when I did the math and realized I would end up paying over a couple hundred bucks for two boxes of overpriced stodge and the miserable shipping rates. So I opted with just the TIE Fighter, since it is the much better of the two games.

And yes, once I get this, I will indeed be doing a video on it.