WTFTNA

So let me see if I get this right…

Derrick Bateman loses the TNA World title to Matt Hardy in a three-way match on a major TNA Pay-Per-View event and later files an “injunction” that forces Matt Hardy to vacate said title. TNA decides to hold a “World Title Series” comprising months of taped matches with no rhyme or reason, with the whole thing eventually won by Derrick Bateman, who wins the title for the second time. Bateman then loses the title to Matt Hardy the following episode when Brodus Clay turned on him and joined Matt Hardy and that New York Giants girl to form a new heel stable.

In other words, the past few months of TNA programming was completely and utterly worthless. And then people wonder why nobody is watching TNA these days.

Speaking of which, how’s Global Force doing these days?

Royal Ramble 2007

Based on a recent viewing of the show from the Royal Rumble anthology DVD set that came out around 2007-ish, it’s time to share some ramblings on the 2007 iteration of the Royal Rumble spectacular. But this one’s going to be somewhat different because in addition to more modern thoughts on an ancient event, I will also include my old “blog” entry (from the old DTM Blog) that was being written as the Rumble was taking place. Sort of like a running commentary of sorts, but done in single sentences and stuff. That makes it interesting to compare and contrast my thoughts for what it’s worth.

Anywhoo… on with the show.

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Royal Ramble 2006

The 2006 Royal Rumble… fuck me… this is the one where Eddie-sploitation is in full swing, isn’t it?

Well, that might be jumping the gun here, but for those who want context…

November 2005 saw the passing of beloved WWE wrestler and eventual Hall of Famer Eddie Guerrero. WWE paid tribute by dedicating two shows to him. They then had an Eddie tribute match at a later WWE show which featured Randy Orton blowing up one of Eddie’s lowriders with the Undertaker in the trunk. Then Rey Mysterio would dedicate himself to celebrating Eddie’s memory by (spoiler alert) winning the Royal Rumble and eventually the World Heavyweight title at Wrestlemania 22. He would go on to have one of the worst reigns as World Champion in wrestling history. Even Vince Russo had a more dignified reign as WCW champion than Mysterio’s stint as World champion.

But, again, that’s jumping the gun here. Let’s check out this rumble show.

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Royal Ramble 2003

So, for reasons that are beyond me, I decided to go back and revisit this 2003 iteration and hopefully offer some more timely observations and whatnots, since the original write-up comprised a hodgepodge of “vintage” 2003 commentary and then-contemporary reflections. For those wondering, you can find the original write-up here, but that will no longer be linked on the menu page. Expect a similar treatment as I occasionally go back to revisit previous PPVs… at least the ones I still have access to.

Anyway, the only noteworthy things I seem to recall about this show is Brock Lesnar winning his only Royal Rumble match and the horrible World title match… and, oh yeah, it’s also boasted the original Suplex City, Bitch as orchestrated by then-mayor and master of the English Language, Scott Steiner.

Yes, this will be fun.

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Royal Ramble 1992

Yeah, so after a horrid Royal Rumble showing, let’s go back in time to 1992 and check out that year’s edition of the Royal Rumble, considered by most old-school fans to be one of the finest Rumbles in Rumble history. Most folks would probably know this as the show where multi-time NWA World champion Ric Flair won the Royal Rumble match to win his very first WWF World title, as the Rumble was for the vacant title at that time. And I will shoot with you here right off the bat; if you absolutely need to watch a Rumble match done exceptionally well, this is the one to watch (along with a couple others, but baby steps).

That having been said, how’s the rest of the show? Let’s check it out.

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Royal Ramble 1999

The 1999 Royal Rumble… Holy Living FUCK!

To sum things up, this show sucked. You don’t realize it watching it back then because the WWF was such a hot thing at the time and the overarching storyline of Austin Vs. McMahon was somewhat compelling, but when you remove the context from the equation and pull the show out of the moment, there is not one single good thing to be had here, save for maybe one or two things here and there. For the sake of brevity and my own state of mind, my comments here will be short and sweet.

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