Category: Wrestling Musings

All posts related to pro rasslin’ that isn’t covering specific shows or events.

Miz As WWE Champion And Demon Girls. Truly WTF Material…

A week without workable Internet and what happened? Miz becomes WWE Champion and the latest target of the DEMON GIRL FROM FUCKING HELL. Seriously, where did they find this girl and why is she so angry that she wants to shoot death rays from her eyes?!

Hey, Mizzles. Don’t watch your back for RKO. Watch your back for evil girls with stares of INSTANT FUCKING DEATH!!!!

Yo.

The TNA DVD BOARD GAME?!! WHAT THE FUCK?!!!

(2024 Update: I’d link you to the page, but said link no longer works.)

Here’s some of the awesome praise that this game is getting on ShopTNA.com

Chris from the United Kingdom declares:

I LOVE this game! You can play out all your wrestling dreams that TNA would never bother with in real life! You can hire a bunch of old, broken down WWE rejects if you want! Then, you can completely bury all your young, promising talent in favour of using these guys 15 years past their prime who can’t wrestle anymore! You can turn everyone heel for no reason and make your faces look incompetent and pathetic! You can even reform the nWo and recreate the death of WCW, in a board game! Watch as your PPV buyrates hit rock bottom and your pointless swerves and horrible booking lead you to slowly spiral out of business, taking with you a whole bunch of really talented wrestlers. I would love it if TNA did all of these things, but sadly, I don’t think they would do any of them… 😦

Joe from England comments:

Not content to merely market their poorly booked “wrestling” and completely ludicrous storylines. The fine former coma patients behind TNA are now offering a completely moronic board game, complete with DVD. Relive all those exciting moments like the time Abyss tried to brutally murder a man with a nail covered bat, without being arrested! Or the time Surge valiantly ran into the ring to, get his ass kicked. Or the shocking moment where Abyss began kidnapping paying audience members. This game will make all your TNA dreams come true, with a proper fire source.

And a couple others apparently wish Noah “Spoony One” Antwiler would get his hands on the game and make a review out of it… or something. Spoony reviewing a TNA board game and being completely driven insane? Yeah, I’d watch that.

It’s a good thing WWE doesn’t have a DVD Board game… oh wait. They do.

Jeff Hardy’s the new DIVAS champion now?

From a taping of TNA Impact comes Jeff Hardy’s new World title… shortly after the one one was thrown in the trash. I don’t know if this is suppose to cause an emotional reaction, because it’s not working… especially since it looks more like a DIVAS championship than a world title. If the title is supposed to be menacing, then it failed miserably… especially with the pinkish color scheme.

Hey, Uncle Eric. Pot Called To Tell The Kettle It's Black

Eric Bischoff was recently asked on his Facebook what he thought of WWE’s recent Nexus angle. Here’s his short and simple reply:

Boring as hell.

Yes, Eric. Nexus is getting rather stale, but that’s okay, because I’ll just tune into TNA and watch you rehash the same shit you did in WCW shortly before that company went out of business… because THAT’S funny.

Bite me, Uncle Eric.

By the way, I lied about tuning in to TNA. I’m not that desperate for entertainment… unless it’s Xplosion.

Stand Up For WWE? No, Thanks. I’ll Stay Seated

No RAW rant this week… I did catch it, but there’s nothing really notable to bring up and truth be told, it wasn’t anything really great. No, I just want to touch on the Stand Up For WWE campaign that WWE is throwing around – essentially a public relations tool to encourage WWE fans and sheep to defend the company by stating all the positive that the company has done. It’s essentially something that was thought up after WWE has been getting blasted by media or political rivals to Linda McMahon’s Senate run.

The campaign is a gigantic waste of time and money. And I’m not talking about Linda’s Senate run.

I understand the intention. I might even applaud it, but any campaign that WWE attempts in order to bolster their image from what is perceived by the media is going to simply add more fuel to the fire. This Stand Up For WWE campaign is already being attacked by Democrats because it’s seems almost similar to Linda McMahon’s own campaign. And when you consider that McMahon is a former WWE CEO, who happens to be running for the Senate seat, it’s hard to believe that these two aren’t the least bit related. No matter what WWE does to eliminate the negative stigma and beliefs that plague it like the elephant in the corner, it will never truly go away.

But if they go forward with this, best of luck to them. I just hope it doesn’t result in their main product’s quality deteriorating further down.

For anyone who cares… YOUR Bound For Glory 2010 Notes

Let’s just get this out of the way… THEY are Abyss, Hulk Hogan (fresh out of back surgery and moving slower than he usually does… which was SLOW ENOUGH), Eric Bischoff, Jeff Hardy, Jeff Jarrett, and Abyss.

Anyone surprised by this turn of events – and you better pay close attention –

IS A FUCKING MORON!

In other news, Jeff Hardy is YOUR TNA World champion… yes, the guy with the criminal charges and court dates is the new champion.

GENIUS!!!

Jeff Jarrett walks out on Samoa Joe, causing him to lose the match. What a great way to foreshadow Double J being part of THEY.

PURE FUCKING GENIUS!!!!!!

Oh, you know what? Don’t get me wrong. There was some good stuff here… that I didn’t watch. But a buddy of mine did and from what I heard, the tag-team match was a solid opener, the main event was actually pretty good before the predictable ending, nice promo from Team 3D announcing their retirement and wanting one last title match before going out. So I guess the show is worth checking out when it comes out on DVD. But the swerve didn’t really surprise me all that much… at all.

So yeah… TNA? Good show (allegedly) – if only this kind of effort was put on your TV show to sell people on your PPVs, especially when the highlight of your go-home show was a brawl between two old guys – but you need to stop pulling swerves that blind men can see. It’s not a good sign.

(2024 Update: There was an earlier version of this post that implied that I had watched the show, but I actually didn’t. Most of my info was from third-hand accounts. Fortunately, I found an updated write-up that corrected this erroneous presumption. My apologies. I’ll watch the show as punishment for this error of perception… although no such apologies will be made if I end up hating the show, which I suspect I will…)

VIDEO – Impact Zone Audience are UNPAID CAST MEMBERS

…as evidenced by this video post earlier this year.

Wow… just wow.

(2018 Update: After a long time coming, I finally found the video in question… on Youtube of all places. Hey, at least when the new owners of Impact needed cast members to fill the audience, they made an effort to pay the poor bastards. This is sad and one of many reasons why TNA under Dixie Carter was seen as incompetent.)

Dixie: “IMPACT going LIVE this October. TNA will be changed FOREVAH!” Oh wait…

Got the news from this page, who in turn got it from ol’ Dixie’s Twitter page.

So, Impact’s going live this October, huh? Long-term deal or short-term? Or is it LIVE once every few shows. And how exactly is this going to change TNA forever? And why does Dixie keep insisting that things are going to change forever every time she makes an announcement? Why all the hyperbole, Dixie? Is going live really going to fix your awful shows?

Maybe I’m being a bit too harsh… but remember the move to Mondays and how it was supposed to change TNA for-EVAH!!!

Oh wait, you don’t remember? That’s because I sneezed for one minute and all of a sudden they’re moving back to good old reliable Thursdays… and if I recall correctly, those Monday shows were also LIVE every other week.

Nice try, Dixie. But the only way you’re going to get me excited about TNA is if you actually do something about the horrible product, which is doing an excellent job of showcasing the wrong people and basically burying the true talents on your roster.

Thanks, but no thanks.