The Last Jedi… Meh.

My thoughts on the latest Star Wars film are going to be brief because going into too much detail might be dipping deep into spoiler territory and I’d like to give people who have seen the movie a chance to go in with a clean slate rather than be, well, spoiled.

With that having been said, the only thing that I can say about The Last Jedi is that nothing of note happens and it’s back to business as usual. And even that might be a bit too spoiler-y without being too spoiler-y, but for what is supposed to be the big, major Star Wars entry – the big middle chapter in the trilogy – it just felt like a filler episode of a television series rather than anything of great significance.

Don’t get me wrong; I liked the movie enough that there were brief bits to enjoy. The space battle at the beginning of the movie was pretty good, the battle on the salt planet wasn’t too bad, I enjoyed the brief character interactions between Rey and Luke, the cast in general does the best they could with the material given and almost makes me believe in it, and then there was seeing Luke Skywalker in action for the briefest of moments.

But for the most part, I was largely underwhelmed. Questions that have been set up in the previous episode are either brushed aside or given rather underwhelming resolutions, there are plenty of uninteresting characters that I absolutely don’t care about, some of the character motivations are pretty goddamn stupid, the humor (with some exceptions) was overbearing to the point of obnoxiousness and almost makes me wonder if Episode IX is going to feature a crossover with the Guardians of the Galaxy, and as far as the direction of one Master Skywalker… well, I can see why Mark Hamill would fundamentally disagree with that sort of thing.

All of this would’ve been forgiven if the story was worth a damn and unfortunately, that isn’t the case here. Say what you will about The Force Awakens, but that had a sense of scope and opened the door to many new possibilities and interesting takes. It’s a pity that The Last Jedi chooses to ignore or even discard these new things and just bring things back to business as usual. I daresay that the movie is more interested giving us random characters who only exist to check items off the diversity checklist that the media likes so much, rather than give audiences a story that’s worth a damn.

Contrary to the supposed rallying cry that a lot of people are going for – at least if you were to follow the plethora of user reviews on the IMDB, this didn’t kill Star Wars for me. But I can safely say with absolute certainty that this is the first time since Attack of the Clones where I came out of a Star Wars movie completely underwhelmed and just disappointed by the lack of vision.

For what it’s worth, it’s an alright movie… but the best since Empire Strikes Back? Not a chance.

That would be last year’s Rogue One.

Why I Don’t Mind The Star Wars Trilogy 1997 Special Editions

1997 was the 20th Anniversary of Star Wars and Lucasfilm had a novel idea for a celebration; re-releasing the Star Wars trilogy for theatrical release and updating them with some new scenes and special effects. In the case of Star Wars, it was the restoration of a lost encounter between Han Solo and Jabba The Hutt… and two seconds of additional footage between Han and Greedo that has been derided for years on end. In the case of Jedi, it was new music to accommodate a couple extra bits, including our first canonical look at the imperial planet of Coruscant, which was something only touched on in novels and computer games.

Continue reading “Why I Don’t Mind The Star Wars Trilogy 1997 Special Editions”

One Week… One Bloody Week…

And what happens while I take a week off from uploading shit?

– Billy Corgan, TNA president and hopeful acquirer of said company, sues Dixie Carter and the company he’s employed with because they owe him money. Goddamn, kid.

– Paige suffers another WWE Wellness Policy violation over prescription drugs they say are “illegal” and now sources on her side claim that a second opinion doctor says she needs neck surgery. WWE doctors believe otherwise; look at all the wonders our Z-Paks have done for us over the years.

– This year’s Survivor Series PPV will comprise three traditional Survivor Series style matches (almost like the earlier editions of the PPV were just that) and headlined by the “long-awaited” rematch between Brock Lesnar and Bill Goldberg, which is being booked for the sole purpose of trying to sell more copies of the video game… because apparently Suplex City isn’t enough of a stupid idea to try and sell more video games.

– The rumored Women In Hell In A Cell match has been confirmed. Not only that, but the match between Seth Rollins and Champion Of The Universe Kevin Owens will also be a Cell match. WOW! THREE HELL IN A CELL MATCHES ON ONE SHOW! SMELL THE BUYRATE! Brace yourselves for mediocrity.

– They announced a Justice League/Mighty Morphin crossover comic… because I guess we really needed the stench of Zack Snyder in my MMPR comic books… oh wait, they’re talking about the comic version of JL, not the film… sorry, my bad.

– Another Rogue One trailer… Maybe you should’ve released this first before TFA if you wanted to get on everyone’s good nostalgic side or something.

Well… that’s something.

So Youtube videos will resume this week with a pick-up video and then straight reviews for the next few weeks. Nothing grandiose for this wave of reviews… I’m saving those for later.

For Anyone Who Cares… SHADOWS OF THE EMPIRE on PC

Now available on GOG.com.

For those wondering, this is the proper PC release with high-resolution graphics and bad voice acting. Now people can bitch about this game being bad with a higher quality version than the N64 version.

Or maybe they can actually, you know, enjoy the game.

Be nice, I guess.

By the way, I sampled the game for a bit. Maybe it’s just me, but it feels a bit too quick compared to the N64 version. Not quite sure if this is a good thing or not, but I can tell you that playing with a 360 gamepad is a considerable upgrade from the Nintendo 64 controller. Make of that what you will, kids.