Dave’s Wrestling Rant #2 – Nov. 24, 2002

Welcome to the second edition of Dave’s Wrestling Rant.

RAW 11-18-2002
The good news is that the show was actually watchable and featured some good matches to say the least and skits that didn’t bore the living crap out of me. The 11-25-2002 show will feature a match between RVD and HBK… but of course, something tells me that it won’t happen.

SMACKDOWN 11-21-2002
Another quality show from the Smackdown show, including a nice scene with Brock Lesnar throwing Matt Hardy through a table…

NWA-TNA PPV 11-20-2002
Vince Russo is Mr. Wrestling III? Some people were quite shocked by this and I don’t understand why. Because he’s a booker and not a wrestler? Because of the fallout rumors on the Internet? Who cares, as long as the shock booking worked… then again, maybe people are shocked that Russo has a job after he helped kill WCW.

Oh yeah, Jeff Jarrett is YOUR new NWA World champion… and that’s not much of a shock, man. Still, very good show.

That’s all I can think of. The rant will probably be updated every Sunday night or so.

Classic Bite Commentary #20 – November 21st, 2002

Good morning, boys and girls. This week was lots of fun for me thanks to our ever-diligent Montreal weather. If you are reading the commentary because of the “special announcement,” mentioned on the front page, let’s get on with it, shall we?

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COMIC REVIEW – The Punisher #16 (Vol. 4)

For a long time, the Punisher seems to be popular. Not because he has any fancy powers or a fancy costume, don’t be silly. It’s simply based on the fact that he shoots people for a living. Until the 12-issue mini that Ennis did, I didn’t see a decent interesting thing about a guy that shoots people… I mean, come on! What’s so special about a guy who shoots stuff?… However, Punisher must have been good enough for him to have another shot at an ongoing title. Then we came to number 16, which begins a small 2-parter about sawed-off legs and Wolverine having his umpteenth bar fight. (Oh yeah, this book was released earlier in the month as a result of a bi-weekly thing, so I cover the next issue when I get the chance.)

If it wasn’t for the cover, you would have had me believe that these was another issue of that MAX Comic stuff that I don’t particularly care for… after all, these guys did do FURY (it’s okay if you don’t know what FURY is). That said, Ennis does what he usually does best; a good story-arc with its macabre moments that doesn’t include Punisher shooting everyone, although at least he fires a couple of shots. In fact, in one particular scene, ol’ Punisher blows off Wolverine’s face with a shotgun. Crap, man. I thought this was Marvel Knights, not MAX Comics! I didn’t expect to flying body parts or faces being blown away. What’s going on here?… Um, oh yeah, Darrick Robertson’s art is very good. The artstyle is rather befitting of this kind of dark, gritty environment with plenty of blood and flesh to pass around. The cover art is nice and simple – nuff said.

Okay, I realize that this is a Marvel Knights title, so there is some violent content expected, but there has to be some line crossed. I mean, count all the body parts on the floor or flying around in the book. I counted up to around twenty-three body parts, including nineteen legs and four fingers. Look, a guy’s face got blown off, for crying out loud! Such mindless depictions of violence and gore is befitting a MAX Comic, not Marvel Knights… Maybe I’m over exaggerating, especially since this is the same line where in the final issue of Punisher’s 12-issue mini, he kicks a cripple back into a burning house. That’s seems a little kiddy compared to this, though.

Punisher #16, if you can look past the loose body parts and the blown-off face, is a pretty good read. Rarely do you see a Punisher book where Punisher isn’t shooting or killing anyone (besides, you have the guy with the claws doing all that), so if you’re expect a massive gunfight, sorry. However, if you are interested in a decent Punisher story or just plain enjoy mindless violence, this book is for you.

Dave’s Wrestling Rant #1 – Nov. 11, 2002

Welcome to the first edition of Dave’s Wrestling Rant.

RAW 11-4-2002
The good news is that the necrophilia angle has been ditched. Vince McMahon has finally realized that these stupid angles are stripping RAW of the viewership and fan base it is desperately trying to keep. Admittingly, it was a slight improvement over the week before, but it was still too boring and uninteresting. Tonight’s RAW has two matches that have potential: Triple H vs. Booker T and RVD/Kane vs. Christian/Chris Jericho for the tag straps.

SMACKDOWN 11-7-2002
The tag-team match between Rey Misterio/Edge and Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit was the whole F’n show! It more than made up for the stupid proposal angle earlier during the show (the less said the better.) Compared to this, Billy & Chuck’s gay wedding angle seemed like a good thing.

NWA-TNA PPV 11-6-2002
I didn’t catch the show, but I plan on catching the next one. From what I heard, this product is getting a little better.

WWE Confidential 11-9-2002
I didn’t get to see Confidential, but from what I read from 411wrestling.com, I didn’t miss much. I also discovered that the proposed Scott Steiner interview that was supposed to happen didn’t happen. Man, what a crock. I was one of the few people who was actually anxious to watch this show and see what it had to offer.

WWE Heat & Velocity
Who gives a rat’s ass about Heat & Velocity?
That’s all I can think of. The rant will probably be updated every Friday or so.

COMIC REVIEW – Adventures Of Superman #612

Here is something I was initially intrigued with: a battle between the modern-day incarnation of Superman and a reasonable facsimile of the 1940s-Superman. Make no mistake… DC pulled this same stunt with Wonder Woman a while back: the modern-day incarnation meets up with the 1940s-version on the cover, only to have WW meet up with her mother in the past in the actual book. But people are thinking that they won’t actually pull the same thing twice, right?

The old adage of “Never judge a book by its cover” has never been so true.

Don’t kid yourself here though. There actually is a super-human being running around looking like 1940s-Superman. Heck, he’s even drawn in the same style and nicely done too in contrast to the current art included in the issue, which is also pretty good. Unfortunately, this is the only Superman-type character you’re going to see in this issue; the modern Kal-El is trying to convince an old man to delete his fictional work about a superhero. There’s nothing special behind this issue; it’s your typical “metahuman good-guy who uses brute force and eventually goes berserk” story. Only difference this time is that they’re using a character whose style comes from the early days. Nonetheless, it’s not a spectacular

This is worth buying if you’re a Superman completist, a regular fan of the franchise, or just get a kick out of seeing a guy drawn in the style of the forties beat on a bunch of cops drawn in the current style. Just don’t jump into this issue expecting what the cover shows and declares, because it is misleading (there is no battle between Man of Yesterday vs. Man of Tomorrow).

What’s next? Is Batman going to have an issue in which the cover shows the current-age Batman facing off against the 1940s Batman, only to be squaring off against 60s-style Batman?

COMIC REVIEW – Action Comics #797

Before we jump into this review, I want to share a little anecdote. A while ago, I have gotten my hands on the MAD ON SUPER-HEROES trade paperback. One of the strips in the trade featured this interesting little frame with Superman consulting with a therapist (supposedly at eighty bucks a session). It’s funny, it’s interesting, and it’s likely never to happen in actual continuity.

Apparently, someone must have read the same piece and thought differently, because just a few weeks ago, DC debuted Superman’s therapist. Contrary to what some people may think at first glance, that first story was far from hilarious, but you couldn’t help but see the irony of the whole thing. In addition, it offered a glimpse into the mind of the Man of Steel and as a result, it ended up being a good read too.

Action 797 brings Superman back into therapy, this time spilling his guts on the recent Manchester Black fiasco and the death of the pocket-universe General Zod and his two pocket-universe buddies by his hands (the Zod thing is happened in the early issues of the current Superman series, so you may have to check the back issue bins for a more detailed account). All of these recounts seem to be a method to finding out who Superman is. Of course, there are some light-hearted moments too.

It’s not an action-packed issue. It’s Superman in therapy. There isn’t that many mindless battles that has been the dominant theme in the “Ending Battle” story, nor do I expect. Joe Kelly does a wonderful job in trying to surmise who Superman is and how he is viewed. Only thing is that some of this stuff is relying on continuity, which is a nice thing, but it’s something that may get lost on new readers. The artwork is alright, but nothing particularly noteworthy.

I wish there were more emphasis on the “man” and not on the “super” in these Superman books and Action 797 manages to work nicely. It’s better that Superman 188 where Superman goes flying around, beating the crap out of bad guys, and crack lame jokes that Spider-Man would cringe at. It’s a nice change of pace that doesn’t feature 100 different fights. It’s Superman in therapy and it’s a pretty good read.

 

Classic Bite Commentary #18 – October 31st, 2002

(2014 Update: The following post originally featured Hulk Hogan inadvertently gave away spoilers for taped editions of Impact Wrestling. The video in question has since been removed, so in its place, I posted another Bite commentary, along with a couple additional bits that were posted days later, but weren’t long enough to merit their own individual posts. As per the case, any modern reflections is added in bold.)

Happy Halloween. Have fun with your trick-or-treating. Now to my juicy rants:

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Classic Bite Commentaries #16 – October 22nd, 2002

In honor of Kane’s triumphant victory over Triple H at No Mercy, I have decided to be paint the site red… What’s that? You see no red? Well, that’s because Kane lost on Sunday. Damn Triple H for being Vince’s boy. It is said that when guys reach the top of the wrestling world, they get lazy. But not Triple H, oh no sirree! He busts his way to the top, date the boss’ daughter and THEN gets lazy…
Let me tell you something; I am glad that WWE is pushing their World champions to have long healthy reigns. Unfortunately, one of those champs happens to be a guy who has hogged the spotlight long enough and I am not talking about Brock Lesnar. I am talking about a man whose name consists of three letters.
I’m going to start this commentary off officially with a brief recap of matches that I predicted. The comments in brackets are the actual results, so let’s start this off:

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