Category: Wrestling Musings

All posts related to pro rasslin’ that isn’t covering specific shows or events.

Ronda Rousey To Be Inducted Into UFC Hall Of Fame

And she doesn’t look happy about it…

I don’t see a death glare; I see a glare of someone who doesn’t want to be here.

Maybe this WWE thing will have her learn how to do more facial expressions beyond just this blank stare of nothingness.

Still, good for her. She deserves the honor, I suppose.

Not an MMA guy, so I wouldn’t know.

Welp.

Brock Lesnar Breaks CM Punk Title Reign Record By Doing Fuck All

Former pro wrestler and now former UFC celebrity fighter CM Punk once held the WWE World Heavyweight Championship for 434 days, having defended the title 141 times before losing it to the Rock to set up a needless “Twice In A Lifetime” rematch with John Cena.

As of today, Brock Lesnar holds the record for the longest reigning WWE champion of the modern day, having defended the Red Belt title throughout this time a grand total of ten times.

Ten times.

TEN FUCKING TIMES.

If you fuckers want to believe that there is some semblance of so-called prestige in this toy belt that is supposed to be on par with the WWE World championship in the fictional universe of WWE, then I’d very much like to know what brand of drugs you’ve been shooting so I can avoid that stuff like the fucking plague. This belt is a joke, it has been a joke, it will always be a joke… it’s almost a farce at this point.

First champion had to relinquish the belt because he got a boo-boo.

And then you have Kevin Owens, a heel Quebecois. I barely remember anything he’s done with the belt and that’s sad because his was the most significant.

And then we have Goldberg, who broke two records in not only being the first American to hold the belt, but also being the oldest champion in that lineage, who held it for a couple weeks before dropping it to Brock at Mania and 435 days later, here we are.

Ten. Fucking. Times.

And now Roman Reigns is rumored to be getting another shot at Brock… at Summerslam no less. Because THIS TIME FOR SURE.

Actually, you know what? Maybe CM Punk should tuck his chin and go for another UFC fight… and then THIS TIME FOR SURE, he might actually win.

No Reprise Of The Summer Of Punk

Yeah, it’s that kind of post.

Our old buddy, our old pal Chick Magnet Punk has had an interesting couple weeks. He had the big trial against the Z-Pak Doctor and won. And then he had his second UFC fight and lost. And then Corey Graves decides to start a Twitter thing because that’s what you do when you want to come off as “cool” and “hip.”

Listen, I don’t care, either way. I will cherish the good memories Punk has given me through his wrestling endeavors and if he never wants to go back to that, then that’s okay. Whatever makes him happy going forward, I wish him all the best. And as much as we rail him about his UFC failures, he tried at least. And he should be applauded for trying… and I can say that with full confidence and full sincerity because I did not pay a single cent to buy a UFC show for the sole purpose of watching Punk fight… or flail… whatever the case may be.

Because believe or not, contrary to what a lot of the wrestling industry or whatever seems to believe, not everyone who watches wrestling also watches MMA. So trying to make wrestling more like MMA or vice versa is not going to make one like the other automatically.

That having been said, I feel like this should be his last fight. I don’t need to hear news of him trying again and chasing that elusive first win. He’s got money, he’s got other stuff to do that isn’t physical, he’s got a lovely wife, he’s got heart and tenacity, and he still has a head. I’d rather he lived his life than try to risk it in another lopsided endeavor. And besides, I don’t think the UFC world wants CM Punk to be the equivalent of the Roman Reigns “THIS TIME FOR SURE!” running joke that WWE audiences had to endure all these years.

So that was a thing.

DTM COMICS – For Want Of A Z-Pak…

So I forgot that this week, the CM Punk/WWE Doctor trial was a thing, what with all the hot stuff and… well, stuff. Anyway, I’m sure I’ll have something to say when the trial is over and done with, but in the meantime, here are a couple old “comics” I did ages ago. The first one was from 2015, but the second one is… well, I don’t seem to recall ever posting up here, but it was on my short-lived Twitter thing before I dropped it like a bad habit… not that there was much to drop in the first place, of course.

About That Enzo Rap

So former WWE Superstar, non-rapist fellow, and all-around nusance Enzo Amore released a rap video and… I didn’t listen to it.

I’m not a rap guy; I like some rap when it has a good beat to it, but I generally don’t care for it. So when someone like a former WWE guy who was already grating on the ears when he was a featured player on TV decides to cut a rap song, I’m not going to show much interest either.

While I did not listen to the song, I did see the video – the mute function is a beautiful thing, after all. And when I say that I “saw” the video, I mean to say that I skipped through a whole bunch of it, which apparently featured a fat guy, a coffin, and Enzo flipping off the viewer. Suddenly, that ad-blocking gimmick on my computer makes me thankful I’m sending cents his way because of this stupid thing.

In any event, if that’s what he wants to do now, then all the best to him and hope he does well regardless of what direction he takes his future endeavors.

So long as he doesn’t take any more sick bumps in a rasslin wring. Lord Cyrus might not like that.

4-Hour Plus PPVs? I Tap.

WWE Backlash was a pretty awful show, but the one bright spot was that it wasn’t a ten-hour show or anything. Well, turns out that was an accident.

Word has gone around that WWE sent their international broadcasters advance noting that starting with the Money In The Bank PPV, all WWE PPVs will start at 7 p.m. and have a run time of four hours or more. The exception would be Wrestlemania and Summerslam, which will undoubtably be ten-hour marathons featuring a bunch of shitty matches and even more failed attempts to try and get people to give a shit about Roman Reigns in a way that makes him feel like a big star and not just in a THIS TIME FOR SURE.

Yeah, well, you know what? I tap.

I showed a bit of weakness on the “road to Wrestlemania” and gave the B-shows a chance… and they failed miserably. I’m sorry, but I don’t want to watch a four-hour PPV where the best match on the card is the opening contest and the bed gets shat on afterwards. You know what? I’m perfectly content on using the WWE Network to watch a whole bunch of old wrestling PPVs that I haven’t seen in a long while or even at all. And if that’s all the wrestling musings I end up doing on this blog going forward, then I’m perfectly content with that.

So I will more than likely skip the Money In The Bank PPV… and the PPV after that… and who knows? Unless the Summerslam card stacks up to something worth a damn, I may as well skip that show too. Worst case scenario, I don’t touch another WWE PPV until the Royal Rumble. And if I do end up watching a show, it’ll be weeks after the fact when I’m bored and I need random background noise to keep me awake.

This saddens me, because we got all these great, talented guys on the WWE product. I like watching guys like Seth Rollins, AJ Styles, Samoa Joe, Daniel Bryan Danielson, Kevin Owens, and others. They do good stuff and can pull off some awesome material and it just irritates me that the creative monkeys not only give these guys little to work with, but also manage to find ways to make me uninterested in anything they do. In some ways, I get irritated at seeing AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura get turned into a joke despite being awesome appearances while watching WWE attempt to get people to accept Roman Reigns as THE Guy, only to turn it into a running gag that I can’t take seriously anymore. I’m all but glad to see Daniel Bryan Danielson back to doing what he loves doing and am hoping he gets some deep material to work with in the future, but doubt that he will. I’d want to be able to give the women a chance, but how can I when WWE decides to put the focus on their failed UFC charisma vacuum?

So yeah, unless there’s something worth watching, I’m done with WWE PPVs until the Rumble rolls along. I think I’ll stick with watching some of the older stuff. Sure, there might be some stinkers, but at least they’ll be interesting… unless the focus is on McSon-In-Law. Then, it’s going to suck.

FOX Expected To Air WWE Smackdown In 2019

Source article can be read here.

According to the Hollywood Reporter, Fox could very well be the new home of WWE Smackdown starting October 2019. The deal will not only ensure that Smackdown will air on FOX for five years, but the deal is estimated to be worth close to $1 billion. Now that’s a huge chunk of change right there.

Good news for WWE as they found a home for Smackdown and maybe Fox will give that show a good push in ads. Meanwhile, it looks like RAW will stay on USA network for the moment.