Written August 8th, 2015
Digging through the archives and I saw this old 2008 video where I was showing this Game Wizard Power Rangers handheld thing. It doesn’t show off gameplay, the vocal and picture quality is god-awful – I think this was taken with a digital camera that has long since left the world of the living – and the video as a whole is short, but it’s a fun lookback.
In hindsight, I kinda wish I still had this. Then again, I kinda wish this was still working.
Oh well…
This guy did a couple NES game reviews and is currently wrapping up his Wrestlemania review (spoiler: the game is bad), but people tend to complain about how long he’s taking. Guys, I wish I could be on the same bandwagon as the rest of you – bitching about how it takes months to review a game with about as much depth as a Sizzler review – but I’m not. These types of video take time to do and the conflicts of dealing with crashing software doesn’t help matters. I remember it took a good couple days to do a two-minute clip of crappy animation that could have taken less time if fucking Movie Maker hadn’t crashed as much as it likes to. Also, another thing these guys have to remember is that the people reviewing games have lives outside of YouTube. Not everyone gets paid for posting videos.
So Eric. Keep up the good work and take your time. While you have few reviews than the other guys, I find them to be much more thourough and enjoyable than the other “Big Two.”
People can check out Eric’s awesome work here.
So Madden ’09 came out yesterday and apparently, I’m supposed to care.
Let me recap something here. I’m not a big football guy and therefore don’t get crazy over the latest Madden game a.k.a. the Same Fucking Game You Bought Last Year But With New Rosters That Could Have All Been Done on DLC You Greedy Madden Felating Corporate Fuck Hacks (thanks, MovieBob). For that matter, I’m not a big sports guy and don’t get crazy over the latest sports title EA manages to recycle from six years ago and releases it as a brand-spanking new title.
I got a couple sports games at best from 2003 and they seem fine for my tastes, but besides that, what’s the point? Isn’t it a bit excessive to fork fifty bucks over for a game that is not only a mere rehash of a game chances are you already have, but is based on a game that you can easily go outside and play for real? Would you really rather play hockey on a TV screen or out doors where you can get a real workout and play the real deal?
In other news, having recently bought a Datel Games ‘N Music cart, I wanted to see if I can get homebrew software to work. I found a neat package that contained a program called DS Organizer, which was a file sorting system of sorts. Okay, so that works and after fiddling through the special package I downloaded (which contained the DSO along with several other homebrews and emulators), I discovered that I can do little text files. Assuming these files can be ported to PC with no problem, I might use this to write stuff on the road during subway/metro trips. I’ll get back to you on that…
Yes, by “old one”, I am in fact refering to the the NES video game and not the recent XBox 360 version with five hundred different attacks but none of them very effective against insanely difficult opponents who seem to have ten million better attacks than you. Now, some smart-ass might be thinking “eBay” but I don’t go to eBay for my gaming goods. Mostly because I still do not have a credit card… or anything necessary to obtain a PayPal account. Instead, I scour flea markets and thrift shops for my gaming needs. Insane, isn’t it?
So yeah, the chances of getting my hands on a Ninja Gaiden original NES game (for ten bucks no less) was pretty fucking minimal… but somehow it happened. Plays fairly well, still can’t get past the second stage with the snow storm, but that’s okay. I got time… oh yes I do.
According to gamedame.com and confirmed by Microsoft, the 20GB XBox 360 model has dropped its price to $299US. Taking the place of the old $349US price tag is a newer model that comes equipped with a 60GB hard drive. If the newer model also comes with no red ring of death, I’m sold. Of course, you still have the Arcade package and Elite consoles, which are both the same price, so… if you’ve been holding out on getting a Xbox 360, you have a cheap alternative now.
You can find the article here, along with the Nintendo Power scan which confirms its legitimacy. So now let me offer my own thoughts:
OH MY GAWD! DEY’RE MAKING’ MEGA MAN 9! CLASSIC MEGA MAN 9! HOORAY! A REAL GAME! CLASSIC MEGA MAN 9! YAY! I’M SO HAPPEEEEEEEE!!!! EXCITING! I’M GOING TO PISS MY SHORTS RIGHT HERE! YAY!
Okay, sorry about that. But yeah, that’s exciting. And even better, they’re going to make the game similar to the NES games – just the way it should be. The only thing that would make this piece of news even better is if it was released for an actual NES… you know, so I can actually play it.
Better start saving up.
I had recently purchased a copy of an old NES game called Stinger, which looked to be a sequel or spin-off to that Twin Bee game I’ve played on the multicarts. Never really played it, but it came in an actual box! Amazing.
So I get home and popped the sucker into my FC Twin and pushed the power on. It was then I saw something was wrong.
For you see, the game I bought wasn’t a shoot-em-up called Stinger, but a shoot-em-up called Tiger Heli. It’s not a bad game by any means; just not the one I wanted to pick up.
So yeah, I feel ripped off – but on the other hand, it makes a good joke to play on someone who wants a “classic” game.
Also, while we’re on the subject of oddball gaming purchases, I picked up a copy of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom for NES… despite a whole bunch of people making videos about how bad the game is. I’ll probably post a review of the game (written form), but I highly recommend checking out the three-part Terrible NES Games Theatre review done by ericmansuper – it’s perhaps the most in-depth and downright entertaining video reviews I’ve seen. Just look it up on YouTube and you’ll find it quick.
For five points, please guess the appropriate response from a typical gamer who is only impressed by the latest tech. Answers to follow, but really, you should know these.
1 – I got a PSP.
2 – I got a DS.
3 – I got a GBA.
4 – I got a Game Boy.
5 – I got a Neo Geo Pocket Color.
Think on that for a bit before going ahead.
Let’s head back to the Zapper, because I would be a total douche if I didn’t mention the other two launched games that were made for use with the light gun; Hogan’s Alley and Wild Gunman. Not much background I can give on these two other than they were originally arcade titles ported to the NES, which was a fact I didn’t even know until the Internet age. Ah, good old Internet.
I never had Wild Gunmen. However, I did have Hogan’s Alley at one point and remember the game fondly so I guess we’ll start with that.
Hogan’s Alley was basically a shooting gallery where you’d shoot down all the enemy paper cutouts and avoid the civilian paper cutouts. There were three different modes of play: one was a basic shooting gallery mode in which three cutouts would move on screen and you’d have to shoot the bad guy cutouts. It was a basic mode that more difficult with quicker shots and reaction time required, but it was a fun little game. Further progress in the game would dub you Sharpshooter or Super Sharpshooter. Don’t remember or know if there are other titles, but those were the only two I got.
The second game mode took place in a cityscape of sorts where you have to shoot down more paper cutouts. Not sure why you couldn’t include “real” people as your foes; it would have made for a different transition. Game Mode A would be the “training” mode and Game Mode B would be the “real” deal where you’re on the streets, but then again, this isn’t Grand Theft Auto.
If you’re bored with shooting down paper cutouts, you can try the third game mode which has you shooting tin cans and keeping them from falling down the pit. Landing the cans in various spots net you points and unlike the other games, there’s no need to pick and choose which cans to avoid or shoot. It’s a simple romp; if it moves, shoot it. I found Hogan’s Alley to be truly diverse of the three Zapper games (or rather the two I’ve played) and if you have an old Zapper hanging around, I’d check it out.
The third and final Zapper game in the launch wave is Wild Gunman, another port of a Nintendo arcade game. I’ve never played this, but apparently this has something to do with the Wild West and you shoot down cowboys in a good ol’ fashioned one-on-one showdown. There’s even voices in this game. Nice.
Anyway, that covers the remaining Zapper launch games. Unlike ROB the Robot, the Zapper would receive a few more compatible games, such as Gumshoe, so it still got some use even after people grew tired of the initial offerings. Next up, we’ll check out a couple more games on bikes: the popular Excitebike and the lesser popular Mach Rider. Later.
Went to a couple restaurants for Mother’s Day. Ate some really sweet grub in one and had nice coffee & cake in another. Good meals followed by several fifteen-minute sessions in the crapper. Nice.
Just about the only good thing about Father’s Day is that my dad doesn’t like going to restaurants, so we can order cheaper take-out that doesn’t induce a shitfest.
Anyway, some blurbs and stuff.
Handsome Tom’s new podcast series has been going on for a while and I gotta say; for a test run, this doesn’t seem to bad. They don’t have much of a site at the moment, but what they do have is pretty damn entertaining for the most part, unlike Tom’s previous website of work, which is starting to lose its luster due to the unfunny and uninteresting stuff being brought in.
But that other site has something Tom doesn’t have: the Angry Video Game Nerd… but then to see him, I go to Gametrailers and… ugh. Check out the Game Heroes here. (2019 Update: Link No Longer Valid.)
In other news, word has it that Allison Mack, who starred in Smallville since its first episode, is considering leaving the show over money issues. This after it was announced that two other central cast members announced that they would leaving the show. You know, rather than having another season, maybe we should… oh, I don’t know… cancel it? I mean, it’s nice that we have a Superman series that is lasting this long, but really, it’s getting ridiculous having to introduce all these Superman characters and concepts… long before Clark Kent even dons the fucking tights!
Another source claims that to replace the departing Lex Luthor, Smallville will be bringing in Doomsday… oh, well that’s just great. What are they going to do now? Film the Death of Clark Kent and follow up with reign of the Clark Kents, featuring Eradicator Clark, Cyborg Clark, Steel Clark, and Supe… Er… Boy…….. um, never mind. Just screw it.
dtm666 