Author: dtm666

I ramble about things.

RAW (Mar. 9th, 2015) – Where The Big Boys Play With Each Other…

A couple thoughts on last night’s edition of WWE Monday Nyquil (where the big boys play with each other!)

– For those clamoring for the Divas to get a chance, they got a two-minute match on RAW last night and it was the most underwhelming two minutes ever. Meanwhile, we’ve had the Bellas cut a promo that made me continue to be as invested in this match as I am in stocks… And then people wonder why we don’t give these Divas a chance. My guess is that they should get new women to perform for them; preferably those who have no qualms about not being featured on a rather worthless reality show.

– Every time I show signs of interest in a feud, WWE finds a way of killing it. Case in point, Paul Heyman’s reminder that his client, whose name I forget, beat the Undertaker… which served to remind everyone how worthless it is to have an Undertaker match after the fact. Also, it’s nice to see Bray Wyatt pleased that his rocking chair got struck by lightning. Suddenly, I’m not reacting anymore.

(Although credit where it’s due; I think it’s smart of them to keep ‘Taker off television until Wrestlemania 31 in order to keep the suspense of Taker’s condition. It almost harkens back to Wrestlemania XX when Undertaker was being re-introduced under his original-ish Deadman gimmick in his match, but only debuting at that pay-per-view’s main event match. Because Undertaker vs. Kane was the last match on the card, right? There were no others…)

– Randy Orton turns on Seth Rollins because Seth Rollins is stupid… almost as if that ball shot from Jon Stewart got to his brain.

Thank fuck for the WWE Network. That is all.

Del Rio Tore Quad. Nash Is Pissed.

Alberto El Rio Del Patron tore his quad at a show. According to dubious sources, word of this reached Kevin Nash, who was seemingly irate that this “Mexican midget” was stilling his online gimmick. Eventually, cooler heads prevailed when he took solace in the fact that nobody would care about this in the long run.

“When I tore my quad twenty years ago, people made a joke out of it,” Nash had allegedly said, “And you internet geeks and marks got lots of mileage out of that. But when this Alberto Del Kabong or whatever his face is tears his quad, how many people are going to give a shit? The business is ruined, boys.”

Shortly after this supposed interview was (never) conducted, Nash tore his quad… again. On the bright side, the hospital where he was staying was kind enough to offer him a giant salad (with no olives – Nash don’t like the olives.)

Someone Made A Fake “Rise And Fall Of WWE” Trailer

Good to see they’re getting prepared for the eventual Roman Reigns failure… though I must dock points for the uncreative cover.

If the late Mike Graham was around, he’d probably be quoted as saying “Roman Reigns superman punched a thousand people… Never drew a dime and he really thought, in his little Samoan head, that he was as big a star as John Cena.”

Apparently FOREVER means FRIDAY NIGHT

Original image from WWE.com

Friday night at Madison Square Garden was Hulk Hogan Appreciation night at a WWE Live Event ™, as a bunch of people celebrated the life and career of one Hulk Hogan. As a token of appreciation and as a sign of how much Hulk Hogan meant to New York, a banner adorning his name was hung high in the rafters, among the banners of past New York champions. It was a momentous occasion for Hogan and his Hulkamaniacs; a telling sign that Hulkamania was truly and forever immortal and would live on until the end of time.

However, this past Saturday, during a NBA game that saw the New York Knicks trounce the Toronto Raptors in a rather tight game – or so I was told – some fans have noted that the prestigious banner and undeniable proof of Hulk Hogan’s immortality and “GOAT” status (groan) was nowhere to be found. One has to wonder if the banner would ever see the light of day beyond the occasional WWE telecast from New York. One has to wonder if the banner is still in one piece.

With no other details at hand, it is safe to assume that on that fateful Friday night, Hulk Hogan left his creative control card at home.

VIDEO – Vintage Arch Deluxe Commercial

(2019 Update: Swapped an old broken embed for a fresh one.)

From 1996, one of many commercials for McDonald’s failed Arch Deluxe burger, which was often advertised as the “burger with the grown-up taste.” Honestly, out of all the commercials they had for this things (including one where kids made funny, grossed-out faces for a product that wasn’t announced), this was one of my favorites and perhaps the most telling. Showing kids grossed out by this new product is perhaps not the best way to promote it.

And then they wondered why it failed… which is a shame because, even some eighteen years later, I can recall having one of these things and actually enjoyed it. After all, the taste is only grown up, not grown old.

As a bonus, here’s a breakdown of the burger that I had laying on the hard drive for some reason.

VLOG – Vince Russo Leaves His Own Website… WHAT?

PyroAndBallyhoo.com has come to terms on the release of PyroAndBallyhoo.com Superstar Vince Russo as of Saturday, February 28, 2015. We wish Vince the best in all his future endeavors.

Seriously, though… WHAT?

Anyway, good thing I unsubscribed to the BRAND before the rollover took place.

And I was looking forwards to the eventual “I’m A Vince Russo BRO” T-Shirt.

Maybe not…