NWC Repro Cart Funded On Kickstarter… Are You An Idiot?

Source:
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/c4videogames/nwc-35th-edition-a-new-developed-nes-pro-version/description
https://www.nintendolife.com/news/2024/06/unofficial-nintendo-world-championships-cart-smashes-kickstarter-goal

Fans want to raise funds to produce a reproduction cart of Nintendo World Championships 1990… but this one comes with a pro feature.

In a day where Nintendo is sending cease-and-desist letters for pissing against the water flow, I think we sum up my thoughts with this video…

Thanks for nothing.

 

I Don’t Get DooM Lore…

So everyone remembers Doom, right? Revolutionary action game that popularized the first-person shooter and a timeless classic that holds up to this day, whether it’s played in its vintage form or via countless source ports and megawads? Good stuff. It’s one of the few games that sees regular play from me.

Back in those days, Doom lore was simple. You played some levels, you got a bit of text, and you beat the game, you got more text. Nobody cared about story in Doom. They just wanted to deathmatch and shit.

Nowadays, Doom has “lore” going back ages. Plain ol’ Doomguy, at some point, went crazy fighting demons and he became the Doom Slayer, the main hero for the recent Doom games. And the Slayer’s story came to an end with some DLC for the last game. Or so we thought.

Now we have Doom: The Dark Ages, which takes place in medieval times, but also features… the Doom Slayer. The same Doom Slayer who used to be Doomguy. The same Doomguy who used to punch Pinkies in the face with his fists after a Berserk power-up. Is there more to this story? Probably. Do I particularly care? Nope.

Listen, I’m sure the game will be fine and el dandy, but I may sit this one out. Doom 2016 was a thrill while it lasted and I never really could get into Eternal’s constant need for resource management when the whole thrill of Doom was shooting demons in the face. And so if you’re going to minimize the shooting in your shooting game… eh.

I do like that you have a shield. That’s a nice touch… we’ll see about the Dark Ages, which isn’t coming out for Switch – I’m guessing they’re holding off for the eventual release of the Knob next year to bring that game over. But for now, I’m fine sticking with classic Doomguy who was silent and wasn’t tainted by comic-inspired memes and shit.

Speaking of Doomguy, I recently picked up John Romero’s book. It’s a good read, you should check it out.

Classic II: Bloodsteined DLC That Doesn’t Need To Be DLC

Source: https://www.gog.com/en/game/bloodsteined_classic_mode_2

So IGA released another DLC for Bloodsteined and it’s another “Classic Mode” where you plays as Dominique and try to rebuild her power or something. Basically, this is their take on Simon’s Quest… or at least, that’s the assumption.

It’s a neat idea, I guess… but why release this as DLC? Why can’t it be its own thing? I’d be fine with it if it were free DLC like the original Classic Mode, but you’re charging a few bucks for this thing and I honestly don’t get why this needs to be tied to Bloodsteined?

I suppose I’ll have to reinstall Bloodsteined after all this time… once it’s available for cheap.

Rita’s Rewind… Or Mega Battle Mark 2?

Digital Eclipse is putting out a new MMPR beat-em-up, which sees Robo-Rita team up with not-robo Rita to defeat the MMPR because… sure, why not?

On the one hand, it’s a beat-em-up. It looks pretty slick. And the five-player (maybe six?) multiplayer should make things lots of fun. On the other hand, the on-rail shooter and driving segments are red flags that have me concerned. Certainly not sold on first-person Megazord.

Other than that, I’d say that I’m… cautiously optimistic. Though whether it’ll be a fun little game or the second coming of that Mega Battles game from years ago is something we’ll find out later this year.

Sonic X Shadow Generations… No Guns. No Buys.

The latest trailer for Sega’s upcoming butchering remastering of a classic 3d Sonic title, Sonic X Shadow Generations. It’s allegedly the same Sonic Generations game you’ve played in the past, but now with a Shadow The Hedgehog sidegame that introduces new powers and such.

We call this the year of Shadow and yet we’re purposely veering away from the one game to bare Shadow’s name… You know, the ones with the guns. That’s the one everyone wants to see remade, but I guess that would be too much work. Either in rights fees or redubbing the whole game with the current cast. Probably why they’re not doing anything with the Sonic Adventure games, which is the stuff that people actually want to play.*

I joke about this being a “No Guns, No Buys” deal for me, but honestly, it’s less to do with that and more to with having a perfectly functional Sonic Generations game on Steam (and also PS3) to play at home. I bought the Sonic Colors Deluxe or whatever it was that came out a few years ago and all it did was make me want to revisit the original Wii version, instead.

Anyway, we’ll see about this one. Sonic X Shadow Generations is supposed to be out later this year. I’m sure the video has a solid release date, but I couldn’t be bothered to remember.

Why Do People Want Me To Review Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties?

Someone left a rather interesting message regarding future video fodder and suggested that I check out Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties… for some reason. Apparently, I’ve had five such messages asking me to review Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties.

May I ask why?

Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties is an infamous 3DO full-motion video game best known for having no video; it’s just still shots of a rather rubbish love story. All I know about it, I’ve heard second-hand. I am more than content with that level of exposure.

But then the assholes at Limited Run decide to re-release this… because it’s a cult favorite.

Again, I ask… why?

There are many other lost games that are far more deserving of being preserved for future generations than Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties. Why can’t we bring back one of those? Hey, I’m no fan of FMV schlock like Night Trap or Double Switch, but at least, those have a reason for being brought back. They’re not great “games” or whatever, but they deserve to be experienced.

I don’t get that with Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties.

I don’t get the appeal.

I really, really don’t.

I’m sure it’s mostly for the memes and all, but I don’t want to spend money on memes. Unless I’m getting this game for free or via donation (please don’t ask to donate – I wouldn’t want you to waste your money), I don’t want to touch this thing… unless it comes out on Steam, so that at the very least, I can buy it, get whatever I can out of two hours of play, and then ask for a refund.

Like I said, there are plenty of lost games that deserve the preservation spotlight more than Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties. Maybe if you made that into an actual FMV game, it’d be one thing… but it’s the same shit game as before. Is the gaming community that depraved of quality entertainment that they consider PLUMBERS DON’T WEAR TIES as something worthy of preservation? Have we fallen that far off the wagon?

So… I guess what I’m saying is…

Nope.

All Five Mega Man Games Dropped On NSO Game Boy

Surprise drop on the Nintendo Switch Online Game Boy gimmick… all five Mega Man Game Boy titles (or Rockman Worlds in Japan) are available to play now. Hey, if they’re not going to do a Legacy Collection of these things, I suppose it’s better than nothing.

For those who haven’t played these ones, they’re worth checking out… except for 2. That’s the weak link of the bunch.

I may consider revisiting these for future video fodder… why not? I haven’t touched the first three in decades and it’s a good enough time to go for it.

Actually, you know what?

Fuck it.

Change of plans.

The “Forbidden” REREZ Video About Emulation

Rerez shows you how to get legal ROMS through legal means… mostly through Steam. This is such a hot button video that it didn’t show up on my Youtube feed and I only found out about it because I tend to frequent the actual channel page.

Apparently, being a big fan of emulation will keep your videos from showing up on feeds.

Stupid.

 

Atari Acquires Intellivision Brand And Rights To 200+ Titles

Source: https://www.nintendolife.com/news/2024/05/atari-acquires-intellivision-brand-and-rights-to-200plus-titles

So I guess Amicovision is no longer a thing. A pity. I was looking forward to such cool jaw-dropping classics like Cornhole or Finnegan Fox.

(Yes, I already know about Fox N’ Forests. That didn’t make my jaw drop to the floor or anything, but I digress.)

In all serious, the most I’m hoping out of this deal is that we get the Intellivision equivalent of an Atari 50 compilation. Not so much for the games, but more for the historical overview so people could about the brand beyond something that was prostituted to sell a bill of goods.

On an unrelated note… can Atari buy Coleco next?

*Yes, I already know about Fox N Forests. It didn’t make my jaw drop.

The Knuckles “Event”… Eh.

After two Sonic The Hedgehog movies – that I liked – Paramount put out a Knuckles miniseries… oh wait, it’s not a miniseries. It’s an event. Ooh… aah…

Eh…

This is a show less about Knuckles and more about some guy named Wade and his wacky Jewish family… because that’s what I want to see in my miniseries… er, I mean, event… about a giant red echidna who feels out of place and is trying to adjust to life on Earth. I mean, you get some of that here… but it’s more about Wade and his business and… Wade is not that interesting of a character.

Dude, the CG characters are the interesting critters. Those are the critters you’re building this media franchise around, not some schmuck people are going to forget about in ten years time. I want to see Knuckles in a series called Knuckles doing Knuckles stuff. This stuff… this stuff with Wade, this excuse to play every single licensed song under the sun… the bowling tournament… these other schmucks that are poor stand-ins for Knuckles… what even is this?

I’m not saying this is a bad show nor am I saying this is a good show. I’m saying it’s a show I don’t like because I thought I was getting one thing and instead I got another thing… and, well, why am I watching this?

So… yeah… not a fan…

If you have a free trial, don’t waste it on this. There are better things to watch on Paramount+. There’s a bunch of old Ninja Turtles on there you could want if you want all the 80s and 90s nostalgia you can stuff down the marble zone. All of that is better than this.

Hopefully Sonic 3 will be good.