GameFAQs Review – Mortal Kombat: Armageddon (Xbox)

Since its debut in the early nineties, Mortal Kombat had become something of a long-running franchise that built its empire on the bloodied skulls and dismembered torsos of controversy, spawning a new string of violent video games. It’s probably because of this violence that it became a household name, enough to get a movie, a cartoon, a live-action television show, and even some action figures and card games. But then, it happened; Mortal Kombat got repetitive, the novelty of performing ridiculous finishing moves went stale, and people moved on. Years later, the crew behind MK remade the series into a deeper 3D fighting game (well, deeper than the older games) and people noticed.

And now, with the new consoles taking over the reigns, Midway decided to release the last MK game for the PS2/X-Box generation of consoles. It can easily be considered the 3D equivalent of Mortal Kombat Trilogy, which was the last 2D game before the shift to 3D. How does this game fare in comparison to that release? Let’s find out.

Continue reading “GameFAQs Review – Mortal Kombat: Armageddon (Xbox)”

MOVIE REVIEW – The Evil Dead (1981)

Having heard about the series of movies for a while but never having the chance to watch them until recently, I’ve managed to throw my two cents on the cult Evil Dead trilogy. Chances are it’s nothing you haven’t heard before, but let me have my piece.

If you want to know about how Bruce Campbell became a cult figure for his portrayal of the idiot Ash Williams, then by all means, DON’T WATCH THIS MOVIE. The subtleties of Ash were introduced in the sequels (Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness). The original Evil Dead contains no slapstick nor witty catchphrases; it’s a straight-up horror film and one that is quite effective despite its age and cheap look.

The first few scenes are mere fluff pieces that introduces us to the victims… er, I mean, characters. The acting in these scenes are okayish; not the greatest, but not utterly horrific like in other horror movies. Then you get to the actual horror stuff and it doesn’t really let up until the tail-end of the movie. While it is cheap looking (the budget wasn’t really that high), it still tends to be effective even in this day of high-end special effects and cheap gimmicks. For those wondering, Bruce does chickenshit Ash well here, although he doesn’t really shine until the sequels. But let’s not jump ahead.

The original Evil Dead movie proves that you don’t need a billion-dollar budget or high-end production to produce a good horror flick. If you can find the DVD (which includes a few outtakes and commentaries, including a great one by Bruce Campbell), pick it up.

Next up: Evil Dead II.

Goodbye, Smokeranger. We Hardly Knew Ye.

Smokeranger’s Domain was the second Geocities/Yahoo account I made and yet it was the most used. The domain never got as much treatment as the WS and for a good while the account was dormant.

Why shut down the account? So that Calvin’s buddies can take a hint.

I rarely check Smokeranger’s mail but decided to do so anyway. I end up with mail from guys I hardly know concerning a marching band I’ve never heard of. Apparently a lot of people believe Smokeranger is this Calvin fellow, but I can assure that’s not the case.

I don’t know Calvin. I don’t know these people.

So rather than let people know that I’m not Calvin (because people are too stupid to let that sink in), I decided to cut my loss and kill the account.

So what becomes of the Domain? Plans are being done to integrate it as a subsite for the Webstation (I already added a quick link in case it comes to fruition). Hopefully, content won’t be too bad.

So to Calvin’s friends, Smokeranger won’t be subject to your poor judgment. And to Calvin, you can have the account in 90 days for all I care. I no longer have claim to the account, but I’ll be damned if I let you keep the site.

Enough already. I’m off to bed.

Later.

(2011 Update: Turns out Geocities is no more… site would have gone either way.)

Nimoy’s In. Shatner’s Out. Who Gives A Shat(ner)?

A recent posting on Trekweb has revealed from the mouth of William Shatner that Leonard Nimoy might be in the next Trek movie, but not the Shat. Fanboys are protesting because Shatner might not be in it and they’ll boycott the movie unless Shatner’s in it.

To all the fanboys who want them to bring back Shatner and are having a pissy fit over it, here is some sage advice once given by your hero:

GET A LIFE, will you people?!! I mean, for crying out loud, it’s just a freakin’ movie! I mean, look at you, look at the way you’re dressed! You’ve turned an enjoyable little job, that I did as a lark for a few years, into a COLOSSAL WASTE OF TIME! HEY, YOU GUYS ARE… THE LAMEST BUNCH… I’VE NEVER SEEN…

Some people will never know better.

RAW (July 9th, 2007) – R.. uh, Ruh, Ruh…Aww.

Some quick thoughts:

– No John Cena on the show; he was talking about steroids with Larry King. However, they managed to sneak in a taped interview. Boo.

– However, we could not get rid of Black Lesnar. The video promo he has just exposes his inability to cut decent promos or even look remotely intense.

– I love the commercial breaks where they cater to WWE events in Canada: “Hey, folks! This month’s Canadian Tour of WWE Live events have been postponed to a later date and the live appearance by Deuce and Domino at a shopping mall has been cancelled, but HEY! CHeck out the Great American Bash on PPV!” Idiots.

– Triple H is coming back. Who cares?

Actually, you know what? The show didn’t do much for me. I was paying more attention to my Doom game than I was the RAW show. Oh well.

MOVIE REVIEW – Independence Day (1996)

I remember the hype that went behind this movie. A fairly Super Bowl commercial, a FOX special, a bunch of related shows or something… I don’t remember the exact details, but I remember that there was a movement that was pushing this movie as a big deal. So much hype back in the day…

Back when it was released in 1996-ish, I thought Independence Day was a fairly satisfying movie. It didn’t have the most original plot in the world (aliens attempt to conquer Earth and it’s up to the humans to repel them – where have we NOT seen that one before?), but it was still a thrill to see the special effects, thrilling aerial battles, and whatnot. Some ten odd years later, the movie has lost much of its luster, but not so much its fun element.

Those “exciting” special effects? They still serve a purpose and they’re still okay, but nothing special. The plot is somewhat thin and the slow scenes are fairly slow enough to get you out of the mood. Even the tense moments seem predictable and it’s not due to repeated viewings. Despite all this, it’s still a fairly decent popcorn flick worth killing a night if you have nothing better to watch. It’s not a sophisticated movie, it’s not a masterpiece, it’s just a fun little action flick with aliens and lots of explosions.

Independence Day is worth a look if you’re looking for a quick fix of action movies, but anyone looking for high art should look elsewhere. Good messy fun.

RAW (July 2nd, 2007) – Average RAW This Week? Now Dat’s Cool.

After a depressing and tragic week that I hope you can all put behind us (I know I can), we return to our regularly scheduled Monday Night RAW program… and boy was it average. Doesn’t sound like high praise, but compared to what the show’s been shitting out lately, average is high praise enough. Some quick highlights from the show:

Continue reading “RAW (July 2nd, 2007) – Average RAW This Week? Now Dat’s Cool.”

DTM BLOG Classics #31 – Some Random Rantings

Got a couple quick things I gotta get off my chest.

– So there’s a random poster at Trekweb who started a poll asking who would boycott the upcoming Star Trek movie if it doesn’t include Shatner. The poster is a deluded fool to think that Shatner will make the movie good and that Shatner needs to be here. I don’t think Shatner needs to be in Trek. His time has passed, he did his bit, and now he’s getting a career revival as Denny Crane. And as for Trek, it’s done fine without Shatner. People like to say that Shatner is Trek, but last time I checked, Shatner only lasted seventy-nine episodes, a short animated series, and seven movies. Most modern (or formerly modern, I suppose) incarnations of Trek have lasted longer. So yeah, Trek is doing fine and will continue to do fine without Shatner.

– For those who missed it, the first Power Rangers convention was held this past week-end. From what I’ve heard, it was a pretty good time had by all, as some old faces from the MMPR days showed as well as the recent new blood. I’m almost sorry I couldn’t make it, but then, I’m not much of a convention-type person.

– I’m digging the current Marvel Zombies vs. Army of Darkness miniseries currently going on. For those who don’t know, this series is a crossover between Marvel Zombies (zombified versions of classic Marvel heroes) and the idiot Ash from the Evil Dead/Army of Darkness flicks. This is a great, somewhat hilarious mini that’s worth the read if you’re into AoD or Zombies.

So that’s it on my part…

Wait… am I forgetting something?

Oh right. That.

I’ll have my thoughts on the matter posted in a Bite commentary in a couple days.

Random Thoughts On Dragon Warrior

Pulled this one out of mothballs recently and popped it in my NES, which has a tendency of working when it feels like it. Man, this brings back so many memories. The Middle-English dialogue, the simplistic quest to save the damsel and slay the dragon, the one-on-one random encounters, and the dreaded STAIRS command.

The original Dragon Warrior (now Dragon Quest) was one of the first RPGs on the NES and it managed to be a fairly satisfying game even to a 12-year-old kid at the time who couldn’t be bothered with them long, complicated game. The menu system was fairly simple to navigate and the battle system is even simpler. There’s no worries about getting poisoned or determining which elemental power does more damage; you either attack, cast a spell, use an item, or run away. That’s all you do and that’s all you really need.

Yeah, leveling-up is a bitch because each battle nets so little experience points and the need to go back to the castle to save your game is a nuissance, but on the other hand, it’s not a bad game. It’s a test of patience, but in a good way. If you can find a copy of this game, go ahead and give it a try.

PPV Predictions – WWE Vengeance 2007

2007 Introduction

Let me get some negative energy out of the way: WWE is billing Vengeance as a Night of Champions. You know what? I don’t care. I just don’t care. After witnessing three tri-branded PPVs that ranged from “less than stellar” to shitacular levels only James Rolfe’s Angry Video Game Nerd would dwell into, why should I care about this one? So all the titles being defended on this one show. Who cares? It’s not that special anymore.

With that bit of negativity out of the way, however, I have to admit that this looks to be a pretty decent card… well, somewhat. With all the titles being on the line, it’s a chance for all the champions to showcase their abilities and an opportunity for the challengers to really step up their game. My biggest concern is how much of the fake death of Vince is going to dominate this show. Hopefully, it won’t be that much because people don’t feel like paying for footage that has been shown repeatedly on free TV. But I digress. Let’s look at the card.

2012 Introduction

Yeah, I want you to digest that opening spiel. It was written for a show that seemed like a throwaway show. Every match on the card being a title match isn’t a big deal; it should be, but when you have fifty titles and none of them mean anything, such a declaration has no weight. So for all intents and purposes, this should have been a typical B-level PPV.

Except there’s one little detail that became apparent during the week… this was the weekend Chris Benoit killed his wife and son before committing suicide. One of the most notorious and controversial moments in the history of professional wrestling, this was one of the contributing factors – if not THE main factor – that prompted WWE to drastically tweak and re-structure their product to the current form you see today. It was the event that had caused everyone to analyse the business and bring up the ages-old arguments of steroid and drug use. Whether you want to admit it or not, this was a big deal… and a very big problem.

I am not going to dwell on this matter, because this is supposed to be about the PPV… but the fact is that you simply cannot bring up Vengeance 2007 without bringing up the Benoit double murder/suicide travesty. WWE can certainly try – they’ve been deleting Benoit from their history as much as possible – but when you get right down to it, the Night of Champions concept got its start the same weekend as that tragedy. There’s no way around it. It’s simply the way it is.

I could have saved that rant for the end, but I felt it necessary to bring this up now.

Continue reading “PPV Predictions – WWE Vengeance 2007”