MOVIE REVIEW – Space Jam (1996)

Space Jam was a movie I saw in an empty theater with my brother and someone else. It was one of the first times I’ve been to a movie that has (almost) no one in it. That kind of memory sticks out more than the movie itself.

But as far as the movie goes… I thought it was alright.

Story goes that the Looney Tunes characters are being challenged by alien basketball players who want to beat the past out of the ‘toons, so they enlist the help of one Michael Jordan, who was in the middle of a baseball career in between stints in the basketball court. The movie is done in the same way as Who Framed Roger Rabbit, where Michael Jordan himself would mingle with the ‘Tunes in their hand-drawn cartoon world and eventually vice versa would happen. Obviously, years of technological advancement has made the technique a bit more seamless than before, but it’s not the only film to pull it off. The whole thing looks fine as a result. The animation is pretty smooth, the voice acting is true to the characters, and Michael Jordan… well, he’s Michael Jordan and he does Michael Jordan better than anyone else… even Michael Jordan.

Space Jam turned out to be a pretty enjoyable film and Bill Murray even shows up to share some of his comedic magic… because you sure as shit ain’t gettin’ it from ol’ MJ. Still, fun for the whole family and all that. Well worth a revisit these days.

MOVIE REVIEW – Rollerball (2002)

Rollerball is a remake of an old 1975 film starring James Caan. I wasn’t remotely aware of that until I came across a VHS copy of the film at a video shop somewhere. While I never saw that original film, I have – unfortunately – seen this remake.

There’s no way ’round this. This movie absolutely sucks.

It’s an EXTREME sports movie involving a variation of roller derby (you know, that sport that airs on the ol’ NASHVILLE NETWORK) and a ball. I generally don’t care for these sorts of films, which makes you wonder why I’d even watch the damn thing, let alone review it. But even if I’m not interested in the sport, I can get into a sports movie if it’s compelling enough. I enjoy good stories more than anything. I get none of that here.

The acting is absolutely abysmal. Like the cast seems to be phoning it in and are just there to collect a paycheque. I suppose I can’t blame them if they had a shit script to work with. Let me put it to you another way. The two best actors in this entire film was Shane McMahon in a two second silent cameo and also Paul Heyman, who plays the bombastic announcer. Those are your best actors in this film and one of them is barely there for a cup of coffee. I sat through this whole movie for THOSE two. Something is seriously wrong here.

Visually, this looks like a mess. There’s nothing visually appealing here – even the token post- apocalyptic features have some reasonable visuals. More emphasis is spent on close-ups and horrible acting than on the sport itself. In fact, the pacing is so bad that I often lose track of what’s going on, but I’m too scared to go back and rewatch because that means subjecting myself to this horrible mess. This is just really ugly. An eyesore to say the least… especially in regards to those HORRENDOUS night vision sequences. It seems like the longer I watch this, with each passing moment in time, I can somehow feel my soul wither away as I attempt to follow the excruciatingly awful storyline.

Rollerball was a dreadful film to sit through. I need to stop watching movies based on the fact that people I know from other properties will appear in them, especially if those movies are going to suck the proverbial meat missile. Avoid at all costs.

GameFAQs Review – Street Fighter (Arcade)

About a week ago, I passed by this new arcade near my house and noticed a multi-game arcade mission. You know, the ones that got a bunch of games in them. Well, I noticed that one of the games featured was the original Street Fighter game. Although I had played the game once before, it was a long time ago and I was pretty incompetent at the time. So, here was my chance to try the game out.

Continue reading “GameFAQs Review – Street Fighter (Arcade)”

COMIC REVIEW – New X-Men #123

Almost everyone in some capacity has heard of “X-Men”. The name is just familiar to the average joe as it is the comic joe. If they’ve not seen the comic, they must have heard of the movie, or the cartoon… or the action figures and collectables. But let’s stay with the subject: this is a review on New X-Men #123, now featuring a new penciller and a new painted cover. Although I rather liked the art in preceding issues, this isn’t much of a bad thing.

The deal with New X-Men is that it is continuity-conscious. In other words, you need to the book regularly in order to keep up with what’s going on. This is a standard of the modern-day comic, but it’s not like you have to read every book in the genre of a book every week in order to follow. New X-Men have their own self-contained  continuity and it’ll be interesting to see how long this keeps up. In terms of the writing, it’s a good read. The issue takes a break from the usual fighting evil mutants or anti-mutant groups and presents us with a first step to building a world where both normal humans and mutants can co-exist, something that is rarely seen in an X-Men book. Of course, the art is pretty good in this issue too.

To be honest with you, I can’t really find anything wrong with the issue. It’s not a perfect book (no matter how many times such a claim is made, you’ll find a few people saying otherwise), but is actually a great read. Again, the series has a continuity of its own, so anybody just jumping in or anyone who took a hiatus in collecting comics for the reading may get a little lost. To those people, I say you should check out some of the previous issues if you want to know what’s going on.

Again, New X-Men 123 is a good read. If you’re into X-Men, chances are you would obviously want to get the book. If you want a book just for the hell of it, this is also a good choice. But if you’re one who wants to get into the series, you should get the issues that precede this one because if you don’t, you’ll probably be lost… Worth your cash.

COMIC REVIEW – Star Wars: Jango Fett (One-Shot)

There’s a new Star Wars movie coming out in May… but you already knew that, didn’t you? And you probably know that with a new Star Wars, comes tie-in material such as a novel, toys, and comics. One of the comics includes a one-shot featuring Jango Fett, one of the new characters introduced in “Attack of the Clones” and apparently the guy whose son will make life a living hell for the Rebels in the original Star Wars trilogy. Although I like to say that the set-up is similar to the Boba Fett one-shots, that isn’t the case… there are some things that set this apart from that group.

Most of the Star Wars comics that comes from Dark Horse tend to be well done and this one is no exceptions. It’s hard to tell whether the characters are accurately portrayed compared to “Attack of the Clones” since the movie isn’t out yet, but considering Dark Horse’s track record for SW comics that are true to the films, it’s a safe bet that’s what we might see in the movie. The book features both Jango Fett the bounty hunter-for-hire and Jango Fett the father to his son, Boba. It shows that the elder Fett does have a soft side when it comes to family and the writer does a good job of showing this side. It’s something that sets it apart from the Boba Fett one-shots where the guy’s all business. You don’t see Boba’s family life, you don’t see Boba in his spare time, you don’t even see his face. With Jango, it’s not all business. The guy has a life outside of being a hardass and has a son to care for.

The artwork and paints are alright, considering everything looks the way they’re supposed to, although it’s nothing to brag about. There are nice color choices that nicely depict the environments and the bar fight looked good, but again, it’s not the most amazing thing you’ve ever seen. It’s the typical quality that goes with that art style.

There isn’t really much to hate about this book. You can’t go wrong with a guy who gets paid to kill people, steal stuff, and blow everything up. If there is only one thing I have to complain about, it’s the fact that the book focuses on a character that precedes a popular character (Boba Fett) of the Star Wars mythos. It doesn’t really seem to a good reason to do a one-shot solo on a guy we haven’t even seen in a full movie, so it’s hard to tell if a character’s been portrayed accurately from the source. This is only a minor complaint and may be irrelevant when “Attack of the Clones” come out.

I can’t really say that there is anything that could be considered potential spoilers to “Attack of the Clones.” Since I don’t check into those sites with the possible spoilers; and since half of them are BS anyway, there’s no real way for me to know. Star Wars: Jango Fett serves as a prelude to “Attack of the Clones” and does a good job to give us something to expect from “Episode II”. It’s a good addition to anyone who enjoys Star Wars or sci-fi comics in general.

COMIC REVIEW – Detective Comics #768

What’s this? One minute, I see Batman has hit number 600 and all of a sudden, it has hit number 768… oh, I’m sorry. This is Detective Comics #768… For a second there, I thought I was being paranoid. In all seriousness, this review is about Detective Comics #768 and no, Batman didn’t skip a hundred-sixty seven issues… Of course, now that Detective Comics is presented in FULL COLOR as opposed to the limited palette they would use since No Man’s Land ended, the two series seem similar…

This issue of Detective Comics has Batman on the streets dealing with heroin dealers, while the Gotham Police Department attempt to track down the fugitive Bruce Wayne, who has “fled” the country… The fools! Little do they know their wanted fugitive is right under their noses… It’ll be interesting to see where this angle of Batman “shutting out” Bruce Wayne will go and how long it will last. I’m hoping it’ll be for quite a long time. The art is nothing too spectacular, but the locations and characters are recognizable at the very least, so I’m guessing that’s a good thing. The story and writing is typical Batman flair; there isn’t really nothing wrong with that.

If there is one complaint I would have to make about Detective Comics #768, it would have to be the use of full color. All I have to say is… WHY?! Mind you, Detective Comics was a full-colored book up until No Man’s Land was finished, but the limited use of colors was something that made Detective a unique book. It was a contributing factor to setting the mood of the book, because this is a book about a dark & corrupt city and its hero. Such an environment should not be represented with all these bright and fancy colors. Without the limited palette of the previous issues, Detective Comics may as well rename itself to Batman Series II, because the two series seem similar if you neglect the art. I guess the back-up story can get away with it, but most certainly not the main story. At least they didn’t bring back Robin 🙂

Detective 768 isn’t an amazing issue, but it’s not exactly a bad one, either. Because the limited palette normally associated with Detective Comics has been ditched, it is simply a decent book. Nevertheless, anyone who has been following Batman comics shouldn’t pass this one up. And if you want to “jump in”, I suggest you begin with Batman: The 10 Cent Adventure, and get the follow-ups to get up to speed. Worth your money.

COMIC REVIEW – Taskmaster #1 (of 4)

When I picked up this book, I had assumed that this Taskmaster character was someone new, because I practically never seen this guy before in any other Marvel comic, despite another comic site stating he was a villain in Avengers. Considering I don’t normally follow Avengers, that’s somewhat understandable. However, when I flipped through some old comics I had, a Spider-Man issue (not sure which one) had the character name Taskmaster, but this particular Taskmaster didn’t really resemble the one in the new series. So this guy probably changed costumes for reasons unknown and now has his own mini-series.

Taskmaster is one of those series where it focuses on a no-good, mercenary-for-hire rather than the goody-goody hero. Although there are some of those types around, they aren’t really that plentiful. Since the main character is also seemingly a mercenary-for-hire, the whole plot seems rather intriguing, if not overdone. It’s not a kiddy book and it’s not that hard to follow the story. Taskmaster’s strong point has to be the art. It is drawn with somewhat of an anime-influence and the CG modeled backgrounds for certain panels are a nice touch.

I’m not too crazy about the title character. Here is a guy who could mimic any action he observes, assume the shape of any person, or replicate anyone’s voice without fraudulence, yet he carries a sword and gun? Surely, to fight guys like Iron Man, these abilities are more than sufficient. Only guys who are typical humans in a world of super-powered characters would such weapons. The other problem with the book is the story. I did say that it has an intriguing story because of the perspective, but quite honestly, this whole backstabbing scenario has been done one time too many already. Maybe over the course of the mini, things might end being different, but until then, the only thing that comes to mind is, “Where have I seen this before?”

For someone who enjoys reading these multi-part storyarcs or mini-series, Taskmaster is a good read. If you’re someone who enjoys a book with good art, this is also a nice book for you. However, those of you expecting the typical hero versus villain bash will be disappointed (there is a fight, but not much). If you can look past that, Taskmaster is alright.

COMIC REVIEW – The Ultimates (2002) #1

(2025 Update – Fixed a whole bunch of typos that plagued the original 2002 review. My apologies for such a poorly edited piece of tripe. Now it’s slightly less poor.)

The Ultimates is Marvel’s latest entry in their “Ultimate” line of comics.  For the uninitiated, the “Ultimate” line can be considered to be a remake of classic Marvel characters, but with a continuity of their own.  So far, the only two remakes in the line are “Ultimate Spider-Man” and “Ultimate X-Men”.  There is also “Marvel Team-up” which has Spider-Man teaming up with other heroes and villains in the new “ultimate” universe.  Now here is “The Ultimates”, which is an Avengers remake.

The first issues of “The Ultimates” depicts Captain America’s final mission during World War II before being frozen for the next few decades (come on, it’s common knowledge by now).  If it wasn’t for the guy on the cover, you could have easily considered this as a war book.  The artwork is superb and the dark colors make for a fairly impressive interpretation of a battleground during World War II.  It makes you want to flip through the pages and admires the artwork.

Now when a new issue of an ongoing series is release, you expect it would have a good story, and Ultimates #1 doesn’t disappoint. This is a well-written and will encourage you to pick up the next issue.  It is a pretty straightforward read and anyone can get into it.

There aren’t’ any real downsides to this book, except for the Captain America costume in this issue.  I found it to be ridiculous.  Sure, it’s a little different, nut it makes you wonder if Cap was the pride of America or its worst fashion embarrassment.  This is only a minor complain that doesn’t hurt the book, especially considering that the costume is only a one-time deal.

For anyone who is interested in the Avengers or the “Ultimate” line of books, The Ultimates #1 is a great issue but even a new reader can enjoy this book.  It is well-written, great artwork and you can easily get into the story.  It’s still too early to tell for the series as a whole, but if the team behind the scenes can keep up with the quality of the first issue, it looks to be a promising series.

COMIC REVIEW – The Kevin Nash Comic Book (1999)

Image Comics was hoodwinked into giving Kevin Nash a comic book…

Actually, let me take that back…

Image Comics was hoodwinked into not only giving Kevin Nash a comic book, but also allowing Nash himself to WRITE the comic itself and let him do whatever he want… you know, I never got around to reading the Ultimate Warrior’s comic book – I only know of it through reputation alone – but I would have to assume that giving a wrestler creative control over the direction of his comic book, especially if he had no prior experience in the field, would be a very bad idea… and sure enough, here comes NASH to prove that very point.

The deal is this; it’s the post-apocalyptic future where the rich are rich and everyone else is left to fend for themselves. The world is a wasteland of despair brought about by a corporate scumbag’s deadly virus so that he could control the remaining food on Earth… but among the homeless rubble and those without hope walks a man – a legend – named NASH. This is the story of his struggles against the very evil Cyrus Storm and his Citadel to bring back hope to a populace that desperately needs it. Now whether he eventually accomplishes that task is left up in the air, as Image cancelled the series after two issues.

Listen, I enjoyed the Chaos Comics output of WWF stuff. I wouldn’t call it high caliber material, but in terms of taking the WWF characters and telling interesting stories with them… I think they did an admirable job. On the other hand, though, you have Kevin Nash, post-apocalyptic warrior in the same vein as Mad Max, except he’s much more vulgar in his actions and is not afraid to get it on with whatever female specimen he comes across, even if they end up trying to kill him or be killed afterwards. Honestly, this reads like every post-apocalyptic story ever written relegated to low-budget direct-to-video releases and probably would have slid under the radar if not for the guy whose name is on the marquee.

There’s a reason this thing only lasted two issues. The story isn’t very good, the writing borderlines on amateur, and the art is pretty bad even by Image standards. People say Kevin Nash is a pretty smart guy, but stuff like this feels like a counterpoint to that claim. You could probably find the issues for dirt cheap if you really need this in your life, but there’s nothing here that you can’t find in any other dime-a-dozen Image Comic but done way better.

Oh, by the way, a kid’s head gets blown off. You don’t see it, but it’s implied.

Just in case you’re still on the fence.

Waste of time. Don’t bother.

MOVIE REVIEW – Highlander III: The Sorcerer (1994)

Highlander III: The Sorcerer, also known as Highlander: The Final Dimension, is less a sequel to the original Highlander film (ignoring the events of the sequel, which takes place in the future) and more of a remake of said film. The settings might be different, the players might not have the same names or likenesses, but if you were to compare some of the story beats between the two films, they’re both playing out of the same playbook. I suppose that, when it comes to make a further adventure of Immortal highlander Connor MacLeod, rehashing what came before is pretty much your safest bet and I don’t necessarily say that as a bad thing. Sometimes, a slight rehash of what came before can work and for what it’s worth, this approach makes Highlander III a far better sequel to the first film than the quirky cheesefest that is Highlander II.

Like I said, the players have been changed around. Instead of Brenda as the damsel of the first film – she’s been fridged via line of dialogue – we have MacLeod’s adopted son, who I can at least say is on the least offensive scale of child acting performances. There’s no Sean Connery for this go-around; the closest you have is Deborah Unger who plays both one of Connor’s love interests in a past life and the modern-day Sara Johnson who is interested in metals and takes a liking to our immortal Frenchman from the Scottish Highlands… and she’s more than fine. Mario Van Peeble’s Kane has a bit of posh camp to him that comes across as less imposing compared to past villains, but he puts on a fine show, indeed.

Despite my griping about this being a remake, Highlander III isn’t that bad of a movie and not quite as soulless as some made it out to be. The movie also seems to exist in its own universe; it obviously does tie in to said second movie, but also doesn’t make mention of anything related to the TV show, which was a thing around this time. I do enjoy the few sword fights that take place with some unique settings like the old brewery towards the end of the film. There’s little character moments like Connor going back to his old stomping grounds to fix his broken sword and of course, the obligatory sex scene that was apparently added in later in production. And the acting isn’t too bad, either. I say Kane is campier than Katana, but that ain’t necessarily a bad thing.

Highlander III has its moments and if you haven’t seen the first movie, you’ve got a fairly pedestrian low-budget film. I’m sure some Highlander fans were disappointed that the third film in the trilogy was just a remixed version of Highlander 1, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. If anything, it makes for a better sequel than the previous film.