John Cena Overcomes Another Obstacle: His (Ex-)Wife

The breaking news story here: http://www.wrestlenewz.com/wrestling/wwe-news/tmz-john-cena-files-for-divorce-from-wife/

I guess old Johnny couldn’t “rise above hate” and “gave up” on his marriage. Har, har, har.
Now people won’t have that adultery card to play on when he hooks up with Eve Torres. Har, har, har.
Me so funny… or not.
What’s not funny; kids believing that Johnny is the epitome of goodness and top of his game while this is going on. Which is not fair to the children who believe in him. I mean, come on. At least the Huckster had the decency to wait until reaching the senile point of the career to let out the dirty laundry.
At least the upcoming sex tape will be a fair more watch– fucking hell, what am I doing?

Got a Memo…

Apparently John Cena overcame the odds again… Considering it’s against Brock Lesnar, I suppose it makes sense. In terms of the storyline, Cena needed the victory to rebound from that loss to Rock at Mania 28. And we can’t make Brock seem totally indestructible. Besides, John needed to get his win back from 2003, so I’m cool with this.

Haven’t seen the show, but a friend told me it was pretty good with solid matches all around.

Steve Austin Lost His Balls

from wrestlenewz.com:

Steve Austin was asked on Twitter about his favorite WWE Diva. He replied with Kelly Kelly:

“She’s my fave Diva. Super nice young lady. Keeps improving in the ring. Very easy on the eyes.”

Everybody knows about Austin 3:16, but if you flip down a few pages, you’ll eventually come across Austin 12:45 and Austin 12:46, which states “Damn, son. I lost my damn balls! Does anybody have a WHAT?! for Steve Austin?”
I should probably read the next verse in Austin 12:47:
And somewhere in the vastness of space, the Extreme Stunning Superstar shed manly tears.

About Mania 28…

Going to be at a birthday party and am hoping to make it to a friend’s place to watch tonight’s PPV masterpiece of low expectations and championship bouts overshadowed by “dream” matches that do not interest me in the slightest. Will probably record a vlog discussing some initial thoughts on the show later tonight and upload around the same time. I reckon it’ll be long and serve as a substitute for whatever Ramblemania entry that might result from this.

Differing mindsets on HHH/Taker matches

From this blog, posted 13 months ago and regarding last year’s HHH/Taker abomination;

“Triple H has to be pissing himself right now. At this point, his potential big comeback to face off against Undertaker (also making the big comeback 2-21-11) with special ref Shawn Michaels means NOTHING. The reaction is basically going to be:

“Yeah, okay, those guys are coming back. That’s nice. Career vs. Streak, Inferno Death Match. Nice. Nice. But THE ROCK’S COMING BACK!!!!

“I mean… seriously, who gives a shit at this point? They’re gonna have a match… so what? They had a match ten years ago, who cares? THE ROCK’S COMING BACK!”

A year later, HHH/Taker is having a match in a cage (this time WITH HBK as ref). Rock is dueling with Cena… so what? Who cares? SHEAMUS AND DANIEL BRYAN ARE WRESTLING FOR THE WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP AT WRESTLEMANIA! YES! YES! YES!

(2014 Update: And then the match happened… all eighteen seconds of it. There was no more Yes. Could there be a repeat at Wrestlemania XXX?)

Worst HiaC Match Evar? I Don't think so…

So I was reading Justin Henry’s 20 Worst Wrestlemania Matches Ever list and I came across this tidbit he wrote on the Wrestlemania XV Hell In A Cell match between the Undertaker and the Big Boss Man (RIP), which saw the latter participant hanged. Here’s the blurb in question:

Yes, not only was a man hanged, but Michael Cole on commentary expressed his shock and disgust about it. Then four seconds later, he changed tone and said, “Well folks, coming up next–“, as if he had just forgotten that a man was vertically asphyxiated before his very eyes. See kids, Cole’s been a dumbass for a loooong time. Oh, and the match was probably the worst Hell in a Cell ever, with about as much ultraviolence as a game of Parcheesi.

Now I have to disagree with this assessment; while this is not one of the better efforts within the Hell In A Cell structure, it is far from the “worst.” People seem to forget that Kennel From Hell match between Al Snow and The Big Boss Man, which not only featured the Hell In A Cell structure, but that cell also surrounded the classic blue barred cage and supposedly vicious dogs that didn’t care about the match and took a piss instead. No, really. That’s what happened.

Aside from that, however, the match itself wasn’t anything special, but there was a hanging. It’s more than what we get from Hell In A Cell matches these days… which is probably why I’m not as excited about the HHH/Taker snorefest in a cell match as everyone else is. It’s pretty much going to be the same sloppy, slow-motion mess of a match that we got last year, except within a cage and Hunter’s BFF HBK as the special ref. It’s going to take something more than juice to really get me excited about this match, because at the moment, I honestly don’t give a rat’s ass about either one of these guys in this match.