WWE 2K26 Now Has A McSon-In-Law Edition… NO BUYS

Source: https://www.sescoops.com/article/wwe-2k26-king-of-kings-edition-triple-h

First, we’ve got Attitude. Then we’ve got Monday Night. Now we have King Of Kings edition… yeah… no… doesn’t work for me, brother…

The above image sums my feelings up nicely…

Valis I review coming up around 6 or 7 p.m.

WWE 2K26 Goes To War On Monday – Pretty Please Buy Our Game

Source: https://www.f4wonline.com/news/wwe/monday-night-wars-edition-of-wwe-2k26-announced/

Funny how these things work out, huh?

No sooner after the post regarding the WWE 2K26 Attitude Era Edition went live did the announcement go out that now there’s going to be a Monday Night Wars edition of WWE 2k26, which will also include WCW Nitro content. Holy balls, Mean Gene. 2k must REALLY want me to spend hundreds of dollars for one year of supported premium content that’s going to get dropped like a hat once the NEXT game gets announced or even scribbled on a notepad during conceptual meetings.

Yeah… no… doesn’t work for me, brother.

Oh well… we’re going full-bore nostalgia train with this one, aren’t we? At least we can potentially recreate the Monday Night Wars in which the winner at the end of it all is Roman Reigns. That’s how it works, no?

How long before the Extreme pack gets announced? Come on, 2K. I know you want to, you lousy bastards.

WWE 2K26 Has Attitude – Please Buy Our Game

Source: https://www.f4wonline.com/news/wwe/attitude-era-edition-of-wwe-2k26-announced/

Yes, so the first official word or trailer for the upcoming WWE 2K26 video game that you people gobble up has some semblance of Attitude Era content… because apparently, the game didn’t sell well enough last year that we need to bring back one of the beloved eras of the 90s… or something.

In case anyone didn’t get the hint, I know nothing of the sales numbers. I’m sure they did okay. And I’m assuming this new game is going to be 2K’s attempt at their own take on WWE ’13 from over a decade ago. For those who don’t know, WWE ’13 was actually the final WWE game to be published by THQ before that company’s bankruptcy, which lead to 2K acquiring the WWE license that continues to this day. The only other thing that was seemingly announced was that CM Punk would be the cover star and there’d be a mode dedicated to him.

For the record, I haven’t touched a WWE video game since 2K22 and never really bothered with any of the follow ups, especially once they started stuffing a billion DLC packs for jobber talents and things of that nature. I miss the days when you had a full game first and then expansions came along to add replay value to the game. Now it feels like every game is half-baked and we’ll fill in the blanks later with DLC… but then again, it’s been like that for decades and it’s seemingly gotten WORSE.

So there’s a 100% chance that I’m not touching this thing, just as there had been 100% chances of my not touching the previous releases. What’s the point? You support this game for about a year or so before the next one is announced and then you drop all the online support for the old game to force everyone onto the new game, except the new game doesn’t play anything like the old game because of a couple needless changes you made and… look at that. I’m yelling at a cloud again.

As for them bringing back the Attitude Era content… yeah, we’re going back to that well again, huh? Despite the fact that you have guys like Cody Rhodes and others saying that we don’t need to revisit that era because this is the hottest WWE has been, 2k apparently felt otherwise. I don’t know what the mindset behind these decisions are, but is anyone really clamoring for Attitude Era stuff to be brought back? That stuff happened THREE DECADES AGO for fuck’s sake. I don’t remember the old Smackdown games deciding that we needed a game dedicated to the days of Sammartino, Morales, Ivan Koloff… quick, name me some other WWWF stars from the 1960s that I can fill the void with…

It’s sad that every one of these games have vintage 90s stuff being brought back in some form or fashion. I’m not entirely against the idea; sometimes, it’s nice to replay old stuff in these new games and seeing how slick they look. That’s the appeal of these WWE 2K games and their Superstar Profiles or whatever they’re called. But to do an Attitude Era edition after the last one… oh wait, WWE 2k16 was dedicated to Stone Cold Steve Austin, wasn’t it? That’s another Attitude Era game right there.

Shit, there goes my theory.

Just about the only thing that almost piques my interest is the CM Punk showcase, which apparently includes a possible what if scenario regarding how Punk’s career would have turned out if he hadn’t left WWE back in 2014. I’m almost intrigued by what they come up with in their fantasy booking endeavors and how they’re going to navigate around certain holes in the roster that they can’t presently fill, such as Bryan Danielson, who won the WWE title at Wrestlemania that year, but is currently signed to AEW. There’s a number of talent from those days who are signed with AEW at the moment, so it’ll be interesting to see how they tackle that scenario with those restrictions.

Doesn’t mean I’m going to buy the game… not unless you offer a sweet, sweet deal to package all your would-be content at a genuinely affordable price. That was the main draw for the Steam versions initially; they’d come out months after the console releases, but the upside was that you got all the DLC included at no extra cost. Once the releases became synchronous and DLCs were no longer part of the deal – that and also my infrequency in playing these games that were mainly used for video fodder more than anything – it became difficult to justify purchasing these games.

And now I can’t even buy those older games because they’ve been delisted. This is where one would make the case for physical media, but that’s not the be-all, end-all solution, either. The physical media is just what’s on the disc. All the DLC that followed is long gone. Good luck trying to buy the extra WWE 13 content on the PS3 Shop. It’s not happening unless you’ve got a time machine of some sort.

I shouldn’t have to make this clear because I’d figured that this would be plainly obvious, but I am not telling anyone to not buy this game. If you want this, by all means, get it. I’m not giving you reasons to not buy this game. I’m giving you reasons to why I’M not buying this game. This isn’t a news site. I leave the source link for the news to anyone who wants it. This is a place where I type in almost a thousand words to digress about trivial things like this.

With that in mind, I’ve got more than enough vintage WWF and WWE games that lets me revisit the old days just fine. They might not have the prettiest graphics and some of the gameplay doesn’t quite hold up, but given the chance, they can be fun to play. I should probably fire those up one of these days.

Thanks, 2k Games. You might not have sold me on your latest $200 WWE game, but you’ve reminded me that I still haven’t touched Day Of Reckoning in a good long while. We might give that a whirl one of these days.

Almost 1,050 words. Nailed it.

Later.

Those Brits Confound Me…

So this is old news, but I wanted to respond to a little something I read over at Inside The Ropes, the wrestling web portal of news as curated by the Brits. Particularly, their response to WWE’s Moments Of 2025 where they declared John Cena’s Heel Turn as the biggest moment of 2025. Well, those Brits being cheeky fuckers, decided that, “No, WWE! THIS is the Biggest Moment of 2025 and we will not be denied!

And what was their choice for biggest moment, you ask?

The return of Brock Lesnar… you know, the same Brock Lesnar who showed up, beat up John Cena on one PPV, and then fucked off again.

That’s their biggest moment of 2025?

Really?

Setting aside the obvious elephant in the room that needs not be mentioned, Brock Lesnar coming back was certainly a surprise… but the biggest, most defining moment of 2025? Really? That’s your fucking choice, kids? Are you trying to pull my plonker?

Look, the John Cena Heel Turn might not have been the big success story that it was and could have gone a hell of a lot better… hell, that whole retirement tour, apart from the way it ended, could have gone better… but John Cena turning heel was a bigger deal than the 283,876,975th cameo appearance by Brock Lesnar that’ll last a couple shows before he fucks off back to his farm or something. That turn made more of an impact that Mr. Sable’s brief run. Unless he turns out to be the real culprit behind… yeah, on second thought, let’s not go there.

Anyway… just thought I’d share my thoughts…

And yes… chances are nuggets like this are the closest you’ll get to me discussing the particulars of modern wrestling as you’re going to get.

Where Were You When RAW IS JERICHO(r not, I really don’t care)

Ooh! Ooh! I can answer that!

I was in the can… having a movement… yeah, that about covers it.

Yeah, so… really, am I supposed to be surprised?

The worst kept secret in the business since the last worst kept secret in the business (seriously, guys, take your pick – you’re ripe with options) took place last night on RAW and I didn’t watch… because the potential return of Chris Jericho wasn’t enough to entice me to subscribe to Netflix and watch this monumental moment, which, in turn, did not spur me to look forward to the upcoming Royal Rumble event from the benevolent and progressive kingdom of Saudi Arabia.

It’s worth noting that I’m writing this weeks before the episode airs and thus if no Jericho showed up on (from your perspective) last night’s RAW, disregard everything I’ve just said, but if he did show up… then I’ll probably watch the clip on Youtube, shrug, and move on with my life. At this point, what does it matter? It’s another WWE alumni returning “home” or whatever the vernacular happens to be and everyone will start cheering for the guy after years of calling for him to retire or whatever the case may be. Wish him all the best whenever he shows up, but I really don’t care at this point.

P.S. Well, much to the chagrin of the universe who actually gave a shit – and this is the part that’s been written after the post has been published on scheduled – Learning Tree Ocho Chris didn’t appear… however, Becky got her title back and Bron Breakker didn’t get the title he probably should have gotten. In other words, I didn’t miss much.

It Took Over Two Decades…

…but John Cena finally gave up.

And people are pissed because… why?

Did you really want another #LOLCenaWins moment?

What point would it serve?

So people can have a feel good moment that will be forgotten not soon afterwards?

John Cena tapped out to GUNTHER in the main event of the Saturday Night with a look of contentment. As if to say, “Yeah, I’m done. Time to call it a career.” Lots of fans are upset because he “deserved better” or whatever the nonsense is… but to me, it’s the only finish that made sense. The whole deal with John was that he never gave up, that he kept fighting to the bitter end. You can pin him, you can choke him till he fades, you can beat him to a pulp, but he always comes back because he never gave up.

Because once he gives up, there’s no going back. There’s no more fight.

John Cena had nothing left to prove. He got his #17. He got his Grand Slam. He has a storied career and reputation unique to him. He’s more that likely to get a Hall Of Fame induction down the road. His fight is over. His career is done. Of course he’s going to give up in his last match. Whether it was against GUNTHER or whoever else, John Cena was going to tap out and call it a career, walk off into the sunset, end of story. Fin.

As for GUNTHER… well, he got a rub of sorts. He ended two careers. Management seems to be pretty high on the guy. No complaints from me. I like the dude. Nice, basic throwback heel character. Hope he continues to do well in WWE.

But yeah… John Cena’s done. Doo do do doo.

James Gunn… he’s all yours.

No Interest In John Cena’s Last Match

Well, they decided on the finals of the “Who Gets To Retire John Cena” tournament that will take place on this week’s Smackdown and it boils down to either GUNTHER or LA Knight. All due respect to both superstars, I honestly don’t care. GUNTHER doesn’t really need the rub from such a match and while I’d like to see LA Knight be used more effectively than he has been, somehow I don’t see him beating John Cena. If anything, they’re giving John one last guy to feed if the former Eli Drake ends up being the last guy.

I’ve maintained that there was only one guy that I had any interest in seeing wrestle John Cena. That guy had mentioned it in interviews and made it a mission of sorts. I’m disappointed that the match hasn’t happened, though I’m honestly not surprised, either. This John Cena retirement tour has been a thing that happened. Not necessarily a good thing, not necessarily a bad thing… well, if you want to count that heel turn as a bad thing, go right ahead, but it just felt like a complete waste of time. It’s either going in a direction that was left to drift because one of the key instigators of that direction decided that he had to go now (his planet needed him) or it’s just rehashing shit that I’ve already seen before and replaying all the classics. And hey, credit where it’s due; people have eaten up the rehashing of the classics… but I just prefer to revisit those matches in the archives.

So yeah, this last match is no buys for me… but then again, a lot of wrestling these days seems to be no buys for me. I’m wondering if the universe is telling me something.

John Cena Tourney Stirs Up Nontroversy

Alright, so this John Cena tournament where whoever wins gets to retire John Cena at some Saturday Night show somewhere is baffling to me. Not so much the concept of it, which at least looks like it’ll have bigger stakes than just a hokey retirement match after John Cena won his first Intercontinental championship last week on RAW… but rather some of the reactions to the content.

So Jey Uso beats the Miz to advance in the tourney and people are all of a sudden up in arms because they wanted Miz to win since he “deserved it” for some reason. Granted, Miz has some history with John Cena – don’t feel bad if you don’t remember since he was the spare tire in the feud between Cena and Dwayne around that time – but for people to suddenly say that Miz “deserves” one more match with Cena? Really? Are we upset that Miz didn’t win or are we upset because Jey did?

It’s no secret that there are those who feel Jey Uso is getting a bit of the personal project treatment – the guy WWE decided to push as the next big main event guy despite people not wanting anything to do with him. Personally, I’ve got no issues with the guy. He’s entertaining enough, he has charisma, and his matches are fine. I was more than willing to give this guy a chance during his run as World Champion and honestly thought he should won it again in his match against Punk. I’m no Jey apologist, but compared to some of the guys this company tried to push that didn’t work, Jey Uso is the farthest thing from a failure as you can get.

But, for some reason, Jey Uso is the guy people want nothing to do with and Miz should have been the one… the guy who has done nothing of significance in years besides show up for work and be the steady veteran who works with the younger guys to get them to that next stage. That’s not a knock on the guy; the fact that he’s still around and still active is something to commended, especially in this day and age… but other than a brief fart as WWE Champion during the “prevailing circumstances” a few years back, when was the last time Miz was involved in anything truly worthwhile? Because I honestly can’t think of any.

And then there’s the nontroversy over LA Knight’s mystery opponent, which people presumed was going to be Edge… despite the fact that he’s still under contract with another company. Or maybe it could have been Chris Jericho, who may or may not be rumored to be coming back to WWE… and if that’s the case, do you really want to waste that return on a night where he jobs to the former Eli Drake? Where’s that Dummy button?

And so instead, we get Zack Ryder… and look, I’m happy for Matt Cardona. He had a good run in the indies, he built himself some name value, and I’m glad to see that WWE saw enough value to bring him back for a short deal. I do wish he had come back under his own name rather than revert back to the Woo Woo guy, but hey, a return is a return and people were genuinely happy to see him based on the reaction he got on Smackdown.

But then we go on the social medias and “Aw man, the Woo Woo guy? You could have brought back anyone else – Edge, Jericho, even Big Vito for Russo’s sake – and instead you bring back the fucking Woo Woo guy? Are you serious, broski?!”

Okay, listen… those names you mentioned. Barring their current circumstances, if there was any chance of them coming back, do you honestly think we’re wasting it on LA Knight on Smackdown? Don’t you think they deserve a bigger deal than a throwaway match on some random RAW or Smackdown?

Besides, aren’t you glad that it isn’t GUNTHER who ended being the guy? Because that’s another one that the social monkeys don’t want to see anymore because… fuck knows at this point.

By the way, aren’t these the same morons who cried fouled when WWE released R-Truth from his contract and the noise got to a point where they just had to bring him back? Even gave him a re-invention of sorts? Where’s that guy now? Where’s the outrage for Truth being left out of this thing? Do you even remember the guy still being around? Imagine how much more Ron Killings could have done elsewhere… he would have killed.

As far as I’m concerned, there’s only one John Cena match that I want to see happen. Do I think it will? Probably not, because I don’t enough people believe…

Nah, I’m pushing it.

AEW Creates Another Belt That It Doesn’t Need

Source: https://www.f4wonline.com/news/aew/aew-creating-national-title-full-gear-gauntlet-match/

The good news is that it’s a men’s championship and thus won’t be won by Mercedes Mone, who is probably winning some championship in Bangladesh this weekend or something to add to her eleventy-billion belts that she’s currently holding. I swear; that woman must have some real dirt on the business if everyone is giving her a belt. And then people want her to come back to WWE. For what? So she can go back to feuding with Nia Jax or put over whatever failed NIL project they’ve got going on in NXT?

But yeah, AEW now has a National title that they’ll probably abandon in a year or two when it’s promptly forgotten about. Reigning NWA National Champion and former Spirit Squad member Mike Mondo probably should have let this lie rather than comment on it, but I guess he needed people to know that he was still alive or something, which… hey, always good to know. Hope he’s doing well these days.

Mercedes Now Has 12 Belts And Lots Of Dirt Apparently

Source: https://www.f4wonline.com/news/aew/mercedes-mone-wins-12th-consecutive-championship-in-canada/

So apparently, Mercedes Mone now has another belt to add to her collection of belts. She is literally Dozen Belt Mone. Can anyone explain to me what dirt she has on the wrestling business that these promotions keep booking her to win belts? And what happens when she eventually has to drop all these things… IF she drops these thing?

Meanwhile, there are WWE fans that are crying about how they wish Sasha Banks would “come home” where she belongs. I dare those fans to try – genuinely TRY – to come up with any sort of incentive for her to come back and play second fiddle to whatever NXT project they’ve got going on or possibly having her feud with Nia Jax. Honestly, if I was Mercedes, I would never give it a first thought considering the run I’m having right now. She’s doing exactly what she needs to raise her stock. A WWE run at this point would be beneath her.

Meanwhile, whatever happened to Ron Killings? You know, the guy that WWE released and people made such a big stink over it that they eventually hired him back. What’s he been up to lately? What amazing run has he been on that he couldn’t do out in the open where the possibilities were endless? When was the last time he was on TV in any meaningful fashion? That guy could have done some great things outside of the WWE box and now he’s off TV. I hope you morons are happy.

Hey, whatever Mercedes is doing right now is working for her and I can’t imagine her being unhappy with the run she’s been on. Trust me. She’s in no hurry whatsoever to “come home” and job to Tiffy Time any time soon nor should she. She’s doing just fine.