Category: Comic Musings

Who actually reads Screen Rant around here?

It seems like every time I look up news for a particular piece of entertainment – whether it’d be a long-running franchise whose only presence is relegated to a monthly comic book or a recently-released motion picture based on a comic book property and is also part of a long-running cinematic universe – I’d see dozens upon dozens of these headlines from Screen Rant in general and they’re usually among the most inane pieces that I’ve come across.

Sometimes it’s complaining about a sequel that never came and devoting no more than a handful of articles dedicated to this supposed missed opportunity. Other times, it’s talking about minor plot points in a film that, oh yeah, thanks for spoiling, assholes. (Not that I’d care; I’m usually looking up the synopsis on Wikipedia for these things anyway.) And on rare occasions that they’re actually dispensing some sort of actual news articles, they’re written in a way that feel more like opinion pieces than actual news articles that, you know, tell you the news.

People will now go “But Dave, you fool! You sometimes post links to news pages and then share your thoughts! What’s the difference?!”

Difference is that this is a blog where I share my thoughts on things. I’m not reporting news; I’m just regurgitating what’s there, add my thoughts, and if you want to learn more, here’s the page I got the news from. Also, I don’t get paid for this shit. The shit on that site, however, is content that people are paid to write. People earn money writing this crap. I get this is an age where anyone can get monetized if they want, but there has to be a limit in terms of the quality of the material.

Is this me being bitter?

I don’t know… I’m not sure if I’d consider what I do here worthy of commission. I just post thoughts and move on with my day. You’d figure that anyone in the so-called professional field would put more care into their work.

But no, I’m being annoyed… at these search engines who brings these inane opinion pieces up and try to pass them off as news.

That and the clickbait.

Oh, boy… the clickbait.

That shit can go fuck itself too.

This has been your Sunday Morning session of old man yelling at cloud.

In case you missed, the new Thunderbolts* movie came out in theaters… or are we supposed to call it the New Avengers now? Does it really matter?

I’ve heard good things about it, for whatever it’s worth. And it’s probably one of those movies that I wouldn’t mind watching if I had nothing better to do… but at no point did I felt compelled to want to watch this in theaters and a title change isn’t going to change matters. Instead, I just went back and watched the old Avengers movie and… lo and behold, that still holds up. I actually want to go back and write a quick thing about why that Avengers work and this one… kinda doesn’t… but that’s another story.

And hey… don’t feel too bad, Marvel. It takes a rare film to actually make me want to put with up with the overpriced experience of sitting in a stinky hall with a bunch of obnoxious kids flashing their FUCKING TELEPHONES (GET REAL) and being irritating little shits who wouldn’t shut the fuck up. I’ll watch your Thunderbolt Avenger thing when it hits Disney+ and I can be bothered to put up with your shitty, shitty, interface.

Anyway, that’s not what I really wanted to talk about. It’s just something that conveniently fits with the title of this post… but even before this whole thing became a thing, there was a sudden thought that came to mind one day that I wanted to share… and believe it or not, it’s not entirely dreadful or negative… maybe partly, but not mostly… close enough, I suppose.

So I’ve read somewhere – not going to link the source because it’s a “problem” site for some people due to certain triggering viewpoints that I don’t share, but they do make me laugh – that some people have issues with the title of the next Spider-Man film with Tom Holland. For those who don’t know, the next Spider-Man film will be called Spider-Man: Brand New Day. Why do people have an issue with Brand New Day as a title? Because it’s the same title as the storyline that immediately followed the controversial and much derided One More Day storyline… you know, the one where Spider-Man made a deal with the devil to end his marriage for the life of Aunt May.

Now, it’s no secret that I absolutely despise One More Day, both as a storyline and also as an attempt at a soft reboot of sorts. It is the absolute low point and creative nadir of Spider-Man that pretty much destroyed any interest I have in the character. I can go back and re-read old Spider-Man comics just fine, but anything that has come out afterwards – with the exception of the brief Superior Spider-Man run – I refuse to give even a passing glance. I’ve read stuff here and there, but for the most part, I couldn’t give two fucks about Spider-Verses or whatever bullshit they got going on where they bring Spder-Man up to a higher level, only to take him down several pegs because “down on his luck Parker” is something we can’t move past because the people involved in the creatively bankrupt direction of the character are a bunch of talentless hacks.

So naturally, I should take exception to the fact that the movie shares a name with a storyline that follows the lowpoint of Spider-Man creative… except I really don’t. And the simple reason is that Brand New Day the comic event and Brand New Day the movie are two different things that share a similar premise; a brand new start for Spider-Man.

In the case of Brand New Day the movie, this is following No Way Home, where – spoilers – the world has forgotten Peter Parker and the character is pretty much given a clean slate. The next movie is essentially a soft reboot where he’ll have a new supporting cast, be involved in a new situation, and stuff happens from there. In this particular context, Brand New Day makes sense as a title because it is a new beginning, as it were.

Also, last time I checked, Dr. Strange is not Mephisto, who is supposed to be the devil… now if you want to make a case for Benedict Cumberbatch being the devil, that’s another story entirely, but for now, we’ll give Sherlock the benefit of the doubt.

So, it’s the same deal when they decided to dub the third Captain America movie Civil War. Both the comic event and the movie shared similar plot points and both went in similar directions. And again, I was not a fan of the Civil War event in the comics – in part due to its contributions in the progressive destruction of the Spider-Man character as a result of One More Day – but also, I just didn’t like the story in general. On the flip side, I did enjoy the movie. I thought it was good and it did introduce the world to Tom Holland’s Spider-Man, which I still think is a great take on the character at a younger age. I had no issues with the movie sharing the same name as a comic event I didn’t care for, because I know it wasn’t going to be the same thing.

So, for anyone who has some quibble over the name of the next Spider-Man movie, the movie isn’t following Spider-Man making a deal with the devil to end his marriage. It’s following Peter Parker in a world that has no knowledge of who he is. Brand New Day denotes a clean slate and this fourth movie is looking to be pretty much that… and I can’t help but be curious as to where they go from here. Because at the end of the day, I still enjoy Spider-Man. I don’t enjoy what they’re doing with the character these days, but a part of me still wants to see that character endure and do well.

And hey, I tell a little fib. I actually do enjoy the current Ultimate Spider-Man book. That’s a good comic. I just hope Marvel doesn’t fuck that up like they’ve fucked up everything else they do these days, but… I’ll try to enjoy the ride while I can.

I’ve seen the new Fantastic Four trailer… I don’t feel like embedding it here.

To be honest, I’m not really feeling this one. The performances feel a bit flat, the special effects are not all that great, the new Silver Surfer looks worse than the old Silver Surfer from the old movies, and there’s no chemistry among the cast, which paints a grim picture when this is supposed to be one big happy family.

I don’t know… can I just go back to the old movies? Maybe get in touch with Roger Corman’s estate and get his version of FF available to the masses? I mean, if you want me to say something positive, it’s not Fan Four Stick from 2015, but that’s a very, VERY low bar to surpass.

It’s a bit of a shame too, because I actually do dig the retro-futuristic vibe of the world they’re living in, I like how we’re going into this at a point where the Fantastic Four are already hailed as heroes and this is basically their toughest challenge yet.  There’s just enough there that I actually want to find something to look forward to with this one… but at the same time, after two trailers, I come away less enthusiastic about this film than I was before. And that’s without diving into some of the creative choices behind certain aspects or some of the press stuff that has people in a fit, which… look, I generally don’t care about that stuff. All I care about is a movie that’s entertaining and if I get that much, I’m satisfied.

So, yeah… I’m not ready to throw the towel on this yet. At best, this is looking to be “straight to DVD” for me, but maybe a final trailer is what I need to really be excited for this thing. It’d be nice to be excited for a Marvel movie; I haven’t been that way for a while.

I don’t know… we’ll see, I suppose.

So I’ve heard good things about the new Daredevil relaunch series, Born Again. Apparently, despite all the production troubles that plagued the series, the first few episodes supposedly continue to set the bar established by the original three-season run on Netflix.

I haven’t had a chance to watch it yet… my disdain for the Disney+ platform is the main culprit of this omission, but there is a small part of me that almost wishes that I’d bite the bullet and give the show a watch.

Keyword being “almost.”

Still, glad to hear that the show is up to the standards of its predecessor. And from what few clips I’ve seen of the show, it definitely looks the part, so I’m pretty optimistic that things will go well.