Category: DTM Archives

Stuff from the archives. Long lost material or behind the scenes stuff.

PPV Predictions – WWE Unforgiven 2005

Quick note: I’ll post my results for the debut episode of Friday Smackdown on the site Monday, as well as a couple of other things.

So tomorrow’s another crappy PPV from World Wrestling Entertainment… I shouldn’t be negative; I’m sure Unforgiven will be a great card with lots of good in-ring action and… I shouldn’t kiss ass either, so let’s get this done.

For those who don’t know how this works, it’s simple: I predict who wins what announced matches. After the event has come and pass us over, I post the results and my own witty comments on the website. Nothing necessarily amazing, but we’ll see.

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PPV Predictions – WWE Backlash 2005

Okay. Since Wrestlemania 21, I’ve made it a conscious promise to make a conscious effort at posting these predictions (2010 Update: So much for that.) Today will be a little quicker and shorter because time is short, so here are my predictions (along with a short retort here and there):

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DTM BLOG Classics #07 – The “Saga” Of The “Secret” Spider-Man Movie

Today, I’m going to be revisiting something I’ve touched on a couple times on the old DTM Blog and frequently updated on the old Webstation. Considering that there’s a Spider-Man reboot in the midsts, it might seem appropriate to take a look back at this rather bewildering project that ultimately went nowhere. And while I will generally avoid adding in my own modern-day additions to the proceedings, I will add a couple notes here and there (usually denoted as such and in bold).

Originally posted July 27th, 2004, with additional postscripts and addendum posted later on.

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PPV Predictions: WWE Wrestlemania 21

As of today, we’re just five days away from the twenty-first iteration of Wrestlemania starring Hulk Hogan and Stone Cold Steve Austin. Oh come on, is there any other reason why you want to see the show? Because of the matches, you say? Well, let’s see what the card has so far… along with some match predictions! How apropos is this, getting back to regular predicting of WWE PPVs on Wrestlemania XXI after leaving it on Wrestlemania XX (Taboo Tuesday doesn’t count.) Don’t expect it to last, so here we go:
Added results of matches are written in italics, as well as concluding comments on the PPV in general.

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DTM BLOG Classics #6 – The Earth Is Sick

A recent posting at Rangerboard (or is it Rangerborad? Who knows?) had someone deduce that the Asian tsunamis, earthquakes, and all-around shitty weather in certain parts of the world is Mother Nature’s way of puking because the Earth is sick. Well, dude, Earth has been sick for a very long time; natural disasters happen as often as they can. Trying to make the world a better place isn’t going to stop that.

While there has been some intelligent responses, leave it to one of the moderators to put in a stupid response by reciting this clever peace… er, piece from a familiar:

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DTM BLOG Classics #05 – About 1 Night In China… the Chyna/Xpac Sex Tape

In a short week’s time, the long publicized, scrutinized, and ridiculously infamous “sex tape” between former WWF wrestlers Joanie “Chyna” Laurer and Sean “1-2-3 Kid/Syxx/X-Pac” Waltman becomes available for all who want to see these two engage in raunchy… oh God. I can’t go on with this…

There are things I can keep an objective and calm mind about. I’ll rant about it, but I’ll always keep my composure. If I go off like a loon, give me a couple days and I’ll be calm then.

But this just boggles the mind in ways God never intended the mind to be boggled in. I mean COME THE FUCK ON! WHO IN THE FLYING FUCK WOULD WANT TO SEE THIS SHIT?! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO FINDS THIS TERRIBLY DISTURBING! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!

So I’m reading the press release and supposedly, the asking price for this stupid thing, which is titled “1 Night In China” (how fucking original), is around $39.99 US. FORTY FUCKING DOLLARS?!! WHO IN THE RIGHT MIND WOULD WANT TO PAY FORTY FUCKING DOLLARS FOR THIS SHIT?!! This is absolute insanity!

This is so bad even Vince McMahon wouldn’t stoop that low to come up with it… though, wait a minute; didn’t WWE have that Girls Gone Wild PPV thing last year? SHIT!

Having said that, expect the Triple H/Nipple H sex tape to be released next year from WWE Home Video… good god. I can’t even make fun of this properly – I’m resorting to crummy Nipple H jokes.

This is sad. Just sad…

I’m going to bed… with fucking nightmares.

DTM BLOG Classics #04 – Vengeance And The Backdoor

All I’ll say is; after skipping one PPV and witnessing two sucky ones, Vengeance finally delivered and gave me reason to sit through the whole thing as opposed to passing out. Nice to see Benoit (who is the reigning WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION) finally get the main event slot, even if he had to share the spotlight with McSon-In-Law and the [mentally challenged fellow] in order to get the deed done.

On a sidenote, I was browsing WWE.com the other day and came across this tidbit from their latest column of In the Know – part of WWE.com’s Backdoor section – regarding our current WWE Champion John Bradshaw Layfield.

JBL was once paid $3 to wrestle for Iceman King Parson. Iceman also told JBL to never go to WWE. Obviously not good advice.

Yeah, they got a point. If I were Iceman King Parson, I would have told Bradshaw to retire so Smackdown would have a decent champ. I’d take Undertaker over fucking Bradshaw.

But what do I care? I don’t watch Smackdown.

DTM BLOG Classics #02 – SD, Euro 2004, Spider-Man 2

What a piece of crap yesterday’s Smackdown was. WWE champion Bradshaw doesn’t make it any better. Now I’m not going to sit here and discuss how that move is so wrong in many different ways because it just isn’t worth it.

Looks like it’ll be Portugal and Greece this coming Sunday in the finals of the Euro 2004 tourney. The opener is also the finals. You have to give props to both teams, as expectations were against them and they’ve surpassed all other teams to make it to the top spot and compete for the championship.

Spider-Man 2 is out for some time now. Haven’t heard much about it, but from what I’ve read, it’s better than the first… so it can only be a superb-er-er flick.

Later…

DTM BLOG Classics #01 – Great American Bash 2004 Thoughts

Great American Bash didn’t fail to disappoint. It had all the endearing qualities and quantity of stupid and illogic that had made WCW pay-per-views what they were in the day. Good lord, what stupidities have happened on this show? Oh, where to begin?

– Bradshaw is the new WWE heavyweight champion. As if Smackdown wasn’t bad enough…

– You’d have to wonder Percy Pringle’s face when he signed on to return as Paul Bearer. “Okay, Purse. You’ll show up at Mania, take two months off, show up again, get kidnapped, and be buried in SEE-MEANT by Mark.” Dang.

– I would have been more content if the card was just the U.S. title match (good one), the Cruiserweight title match (Rey/Chavo delivers whether you want to admit it or not), the SEE-MEANT crypt match with Taker ‘killing’ Bearer, and the bag of shit that was the WWE World title match. Instead, they added these jobber matches that aren’t even suited for Sunday Night Heat. And do we really need another Sable/Torrie match?

– Chicks in bikinis… yep, the illusion is shattered. This is a WWE pay-per-view.

What a crappy PPV. It’s almost sad that just a short couple years ago, THIS was the superior show.

Anyway, that’s it. Hope everyone has a Happy Canada/Independence Day…

Later…