PPV Predictions – WWE Royal Rumble 2011 (Follow Up)

It just occurred to me that during my predictions diatribe over the whole THREE MATCHES, I neglected to mention the Divas Title match, which Eve Torres won for some reason despite not being part of the original line-up. You know, there’s a very good reason why I didn’t bring up the match and why I didn’t acknowledge its existence in the original post;

I didn’t care.

Anyone who has read the previous predictions posts on this blog (or watched the video of me trying to watch RAW 900) should know that I don’t care for the Divas matches in general. Trying to watch these women bounce around the ring is depressing and makes me yearn for the days when WWE had competent women wrestlers who were capable of putting on a decent match every so often. It seems rather sad that when there are hot women in tight spandex on my TV these days, I want to take a piss.

I don’t blame the women; I’m sure they try their best, but their best isn’t enough and nobody else is giving me sufficient reason to care for these ladies. They have no personalities whatsoever and are nothing more than glorified interchangeable Barbie dolls.

Maybe Awesome Kong will change that perception when she eventually debuts… but I have a feeling she’s just going to be repackaged as the “black” Bertha Faye. It’s been more than a decade since such a gimmick was pulled off; I’m sure Vince is anxious for a revival.

My predictions:
Edge retains his World title.
Miz retains his WWE title.

John Cena wins the Rumble.

The results on the card:
Edge retains his World title. (1-0)
Miz retains his WWE title. (2-0)
Alberto Del Rio (YES!) win the Rumble! Thank GOD! (2-1)

POST-SHOW NOTES: It just occurred to me that Dolph Ziggler and Randy Orton, the two guys who were competing for world titles and lost, were entered into the Royal Rumble match. I guess the bump to 40 wasn’t so good after all, was it? It also just occurred to me that Kevin Nash did not tear a quad during his more-than-brief stint at the Royal Rumble. Good show, Kev.

Later.

PPV Predictions: WWE Royal Rumble 2011

Okay, so what we have here is a three-hour pay-per-view with a hundred dollar price tag and all we get are THREE matches… Two World Title matches which will see the champions retain their titles so that they can drop them at the next PPV (yeah, that’s right – both Edge and Miz walk out with their titles. That’s my pick.) and a Royal Rumble match that just got a boost from the traditional thrity-man format to a bloated forty-man format. Now, I said that I would reserve judgment for the match until I actually see it for myself (whether it’d be tonight through a stream or when the eventual DVD comes out), but hearing about this announcement beforehand made me wonder if they had enough talent to fill such a match.

Now here’s the deal… this is probably just a one-off thing to see if they could pull it off. If they manage to pull this off without a hitch, then it might work. However, there’s barely enough talent to pull it off, which means we’ll be getting surprise entrants for the sake of having surprise entrants. And if that’s the whole point of the bloating of the Rumble, then it’s a pretty pointless move since you could still have surprise entrants with the standard format. Hell, the whole concept of the Rumble that made it fun to watch is that you didn’t know who was going to show up. Now they just list off the list of participants in WWE.COM and randomize the order of entries. It’s just pointless.

So who’s gonna win the Rumble? I’d like to see someone new win it and get a title shot at Wrestlemania… maybe win the title. Someone like John Morrison, Alberto Del Rio, or CM Punk might be good candidates to win the match and seem to be popular choices among certain people. In fact, I would be more inclined to spend the hundred bucks on Wrestlemania if the main event featured a newcomer to the main event picture and quite possibly win the big one, earning him some fresh credibility and making a new star in the progress.

It’s the best idea to push if WWE insists on this whole “youth movement” that people claim they’re pushing for, not having old fucks like Triple H or John Cena win the Rumble again… although that’s going to happen anyway because WWE isn’t forward thinking.

So, to sum up my diatribe above:

My predictions:
Edge retains his World title.
Miz retains his WWE title.

John Cena wins the Rumble.

That is all.

PPV Predictions – TNA Genesis 2011

Okay, so it’s been a while since I did one of these PPV Prediction things and since there’s a TNA PPV tonight, I’d figure that I throw my two-cents in. I have to admit that I haven’t really been following Impact all that, although I did see a couple shows and checked the recaps, so the picks are based on speculation and personal thought.

So here we go…

Continue reading “PPV Predictions – TNA Genesis 2011”

PPV Prediction – WWE Hell In A Cell 2010

Well, two weeks after their incredibly “okay” Night of Champions PPV, World Wrestling Entertainment presents its first of two October PPVs, Hell In A Cell. Are you one of the lucky suckers… er, I mean, customers who paid fifty to sixty bucks on a PPV comprising a whole FIVE MATCHES? Boy, that’s a real bang for your buck. No wonder people aren’t forking over their hard-earned money to buy WWE Pay-Per-Views.

Anyways… let’s get to the goods.

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PPV Predictions – WWE Summerslam 2010

Before I begin, I would just like to mention that the final scene with RVD bloodied on the floor is just about the most Hardcore thing to happen in what was otherwise a fine TNA program. Hell, if this was the PPV and I was in a position to buy PPVs, I’d buy this one rather than Hardcore Justice.

Speaking of PPVs I’d be willing to buy, here comes Summerslam and despite the one Divas match on the card, it’s shaping up to be one fine PPV event with a number of intriguing match-ups and a real potential for new stars to break through, which is always a wonderful thing to witness. But enough of that. Let’s get to the picks:

Continue reading “PPV Predictions – WWE Summerslam 2010”

A Message From The Livid Gamer

WARNING: The following is a written mockery based on a previous blog post… which is based on comments by a friend of a popular angry nerd or something. Though there is some mockery, there is some truth in regards to… certain stuff. Without further to do, I give the floor to the LIVID GAMER.

*cue the Livid Gamer theme song, if he had one*

Hey, guys. Livid Gamer here with an important announcement.

People have said that I “nuked the fridge” with the Chu Chu Train episode. And yet, Zero episodes later, I’m still here, you goobers. Some non-episodes will be weaker than others… but that’s what you have to do to ‘ceed; keep on sucking.
As for the random character portrayed by my best buddy being annoying, that’s one character where it really was intended to be annoying but ends up being as stupid and pointless as all the other random non-characters in my program. So if he annoyed you, good. I’m glad he annoyed you. His goal was to annoy you and tune you away from my products. When you’re playing a game, and the game fucks up, that means the game sucks and you should feed it to your game shredder or toss it to your fireplace. Enjoy that fresh chemical odor that will inhabit your humble abode for years to come.
Anyway, if you want to see something REALLY annoying, you can watch me jump around like an asshole as the cowardly lion… or Bugs Bunny… or a Jewish skeleton who celebrates Christmas. I mean, I hear it all the time. You don’t like the live action characters; they all act the same; they’re out of character. We get it.
Guess what?
WE DON’T GIVE A SHITLOAD

OF FUCK WHAT YOU THINK!

There’s going to be more characters. They’re all going to act the same and be totally inaccurate to the original portrayal. When we do more Bugs Bunny games, we will have him act less like the classic character we remember and more like some fuckhead who has played a whole bunch of characters the same way, essentially becoming a non-character. Get over it. If you want pure game reviews, go make your own and see how exciting that gets after about twenty of them, even though pure game reviews have been around FOREVER and provide a formal. I sound like a broken record claiming that the angry reviewer style is a revolutionary new way of reviewing games when it’s just a means to cover up the fact that you suck at reviewing.
And just to cover my ass so that people don’t immediately think we don’t care what the fans think (and honestly, we don’t because the fans will like any shit we throw at them – just look at the Glitchy Bunny episode I tossed to gether on VaporTube.):
Sometimes I find it fun to add in guest characters like Spider-Man (but we call him Spiderman because we hate hyphens,) Ninja Gaiden (who has a real name, but I can’t be bothered to do the research,) and whatnot. We have a lot of fun shooting those episodes because we love taking these classic characters and turn them into pseudo-Nerd clones that act NOTHING like their mainstream interpretation, essentially turning them into non-characters.
Sure, some works better than other, like the time we had our guitar guy play as himself but swearing more often and acting like a Nerd instead of a unique character. But just because some fans don’t like the guest non-characters, doesn’t mean we’re going to stop using them. We’re not going to change our work method of a few complaints and so when you see a new character, he’s going act the same way as before – like the fucking angry reviewer – BECAUSE THAT’S CREATIVITY AT ITS FINEST!!!
So when I said “We don’t care what you think”, that does not mean we don’t care about the fans – you know, the mindless sheep that will like anything we throw at them, even if it’s pure shit. We love the fans. But we don’t care what they think if they don’t like our stuff.
The series is not ending. I may exert some non-effort, but this series isn’t ending any time soon.
That is all. Maybe this will appear in FOX NEWS or something.
I’m so LIVID.