Category: DTM BLOG Classics

Some random bits…

Continue reading “DTM BLOG Classics #44 – Random Wrestling Quibbles”

A collection of really short blog posts combined into a single compilation post, covering a week’s worth of stuff.

Continue reading “DTM BLOG Classics #43 – Random Blurbs”

According to any wrestling news site worth reading, Vince McMahon has been talking about his wrestlers needing to be better actors. The idea is that WWE programming should have the same top-notch acting as a regular television show.

Only problem with this scenario is that wrestlers aren’t good actors… if they were, every film WWE has churned out would have been a success. Let’s be honest here – not everyone can Dwayne Johnson, who was the only wrestler to be a good actor… and look where he ended up. Maybe if the wrestler becomes a good actor, he might actually want to act in a better show…

Might want to reconsider that better actor thing, Vince. Aim a little lower… try convincing wrestlers they should be better than Santa With Muscles or Mr. Nanny, but not much farther than that and you’ll be OK.

Speaking of better acting, Pinkie turned 30 some time ago and so I offer belated birthday wishes.

Finally, I’d like to offer a friendly reminder to all those modern gaming console owners to head on over to their digital shop of choice and pick up 9… because 140,000+ clearly isn’t a big enough sales number. It is a nice throwback to the days when video games were awesome, except it’s made today and that’s fun.

(2019 Update: This compilation features two posts regarding WWE’s Unforgiven PPV, which featured three things of note; the end of CM Punk’s first World title reign without him ever doing the job, the debut of the “Championship Scramble” gimmick match that hurts my brain, and the sad realization that I didn’t really missed the PPV; I just skipped it. Oh well…)

BEFORE (September 6th, 2008)
For sixty minutes, fifteen men will compete in three matches. We’ll see if anyone cares for that amount of time. In any case… the Unforgiven PPV introduces WWE audiences to the Scramble match. The rules are… too headache-inducing for me to repeat, so I’ll just copy and paste them from WWE.com:

The rules for the Championship Scramble are simple: Two randomly selected ring warriors will start the match, with a new challenger stepping in every five minutes. If a man scores a pinfall or submission on any other in the match, he is declared the “interim” champion – though he will not be historically recognized as such. The title can change hands as many times as necessary throughout the bout, and the Superstar to earn the final pinfall or submission within the 20-minute time limit will be officially declared the Champion.

So did you get all that? Good, because I sure as hell didn’t. But that’s okay, because WWE is willing to push this type of match as something new and innovative instead of just time-filler to give a shitload of guys something to do for the PPV so hard that they’re giving you not ONE Scramble match… but NOT TWO Scramble matches… but THREE Scramble matches! All in one night! Unbelievable!

It’s like puking on a pile of shit in a puddle of piss.

So anyway, let’s just forget about the predictions because I honestly don’t give ten shits about HHH’s title match that he’s obviously going to win or the end of the CM Punk title reign or the continuation of Mark Henry’s charity title reign as well as the continued burial of Matt Hardy. I don’t particularly care for Dibiase/Rhodes retaining their titles against Cryme Tyme nor do I care about the Divas championship. You know what? Who gives a shit about all that?

Because in the end, it’s about one match.

Now yes, I’ll be the first to admit that I get a little pissy when two guys have been having matches on a monthly basis and it gets to a point where they should really move on… but truth be told, I’m digging this Chris Jericho/Shawn Michaels feud. It’s actually the only reason I tune in to RAW these days. It’s actually a genuinely good story filled with bitterness and what is sold as legitimate hatred between the two (but we all know these guys love each other). There hasn’t been a more compelling storyline in WWE in fucking years than what these guys are doing together.

So yeah, let these guys kill each other. They do such a great job at it and it makes us happy. Good enough that it could very well work outside of a wrestling environment (not recommended). Congrats to Chris and Shawn for a good show… keep up the good work.

So yeah, I was supposed to do predictions… maybe next time. I think I’ll sit back and enjoy the kick-ass feud… and cook some scrambled eggs.

G’night.

AFTER (September 8th, 2008)
For those who care, here are the results of the Unforgiven PPV from last night. No witty comments because I missed the PPV.

Matt Hardy wins the ECW Scramble to become ECW Champion.

Ted Dibiase/Cody Rhodes defeat Cryme Tyme to retain the Tag Titles.

Chris Jericho defeats Shawn Michaels when Shawn wouldn’t stop beating on Jericho.

Michelle McCool beats… random ho to retain the Butterfly Belt.

Triple H wins… again.

CM Punk… doesn’t even wrestle in the main event. Wow, that’s harsh. It’s bad enough he lost the title, but they don’t even let him compete on top of that. Bullshit.

So your new world champ is… replacement Chris Jericho.

Wow.

Must check out PPV.

(2019 Update: This was the “historic” 1000th post on the original DTM Blog, which felt like a monumental occasion before the number felt meaningless in the long run, such as being part of a new blog where it sits far lower on that count. I decided to dedicate the post to what was at the time a substantial acquisition or two in the collection, as the banner above would indicate.)

1000th post… Go fucking figure.

Two significant things happened in regards to my small but growing gaming library. Not so much significant to you, but significant to me. Which is probably the reason why I decided to use this monumental 1000th Blog Post to bring it up… that and I had nothing really major planned and just wanted any excuse to promote something as “big”.

1) August 29th saw me pick up a copy of Mega Man 5 for the NES. Yeah, some people will say that it’s one of the weaker titles in the Mega Man library, but it’s still a fairly good game in its own right – and it DID introduce Beat the Bird, who is in its best form in this game, unlike in Mega Man 7 where all he does is saves you from pits after freeing him from his cage and then you have to pay for extra tokens if you want him to save you from pits again – ungreatful capitalist bird bastard. The big deal with this one purchase is that the circle of NES Mega Man games is now complete, as I now own all six titles – one of several obsessive goals I’ve had ever since I got back into the groove of retro gaming with the purchase of the FC Twin back in October 2007. So in the broader sense of the mainstream Classic series (not counting the handhelds or spin-offs) – with the PS1 Mega Man 8 also in my possession, all that’s left now is the SNES Mega Man 7 and possibly the GBA Megaman & Bass… and maybe, just maybe I’ll save up for a next-gen console so I can have me some Mega Man 9. That’ll be awhile.

2) August 30th saw me pick up a Sega Dreamcast. I can now call myself one of the few (hundred something) gamers to lay claim to all four major consoles of the Sixth Generation… you know, the one with the Gamecube, Playstation-2, and X-Box original. The deal was actually not that bad, as it came with a Dreamcast, two controllers, a third-party Memory Card (no LCD screen on this one), and six games. No Sonic Adventure in the set – which is fine because I have it on Gamecube and play it even less there… Sorry, guys. It may be the best of the 3D Sonics, but I just can’t get into it, but I digress – there’s a football game I don’t care about – I was remotely interested by the included NBA 2K box, but it was empty – but at least I have a copy of WWF Royal Rumble I can call my own. I might even get used to the bloated controller. Pretty sweet deal, I suppose.

So five years (not quite) and 1000 posts later… I’m still here. I’m still gainfully employed, I’m still relatively healthy as long as I stay away from anything made by Maple Leaf for the foreseeable future, I’m still watching movies, I’m still playing games, and perhaps most of all, I’m still satisfied with how things turned out. Could things be a bit different? Maybe, maybe not. But I’ve long since given up on dwelling on what could have been and taking advantage of what I got now… even if it seems little by most people’s standard.

At the same time, there comes a time when I have to get off the Lakitu cloud I’ve been floating for the past few years and grow up. The time will come when I have to look at the big picture and set up bigger personal goals for myself instead of just materialistic ones. I have to go for truly important choices and not just the ones that make me happy now. When that magical time comes, I’ll let you know… but for now, I’m going for a walk outside… or at least a drive to Wal-Mart and pick up some BBQ sauce.

So for the few who have been following this blog, for the few who has stopped by for a quick look and left promptly after, for the few who remotely cared, I want to say thanks for being here. It means a lot… no, really. It does.

I’ll be back soon. See ya.

Some quick blog posts compiled into one…

So I haven’t commented enough on the decision to make Mike Adamle the GM of RAW. Truth be known, I think this is a terrible idea to make him the head of a company because god knows they’re just going to have him name matches and change them midway because he actually meant something else. However, as Eric Bischoff suggested in a recent blog post, let’s wait and see what this guy offers. Perhaps being GM is more up Adamle’s alley and we don’t have to see him or hear him as often as we would have when he was mangling the commentary behind the mic. I mean, they made Coach a character and look where that went…

Okay, bad example.

On the bright side, CM Punk is still World Heavyweight Champion. So there’s at least some silver lining in all this.

According to most wrestling sites and rating places, WWE’s one-hour Saturday Night Main Event special, featuring such exciting matches as Jenny McCarthy fighting Autism by talking, fell in last place in terms of ratings and viewership. Man, there used to be a time when SNME was a big deal, but now it’s just anoher throwaway show nobody gives a shit about.

So I saw the first few eps of Flashpoint, that new CTV/CBS cop show and I actually enjoyed some of it. It’s not as boring or as sleep-inducing as the other shows and it’s actually a nice breath of fresh air. Also, it has a preggers AJ in there (although she doesn’t have a big bump just yet). Overally, nice show. Catch it if you can.

So apparently, there’s an incompatibility snafu with my FC Twin. Certain Mindscape titles (such as Captain Planet and The Last Starfighter) won’t recognize any of my button inputs. However, this is apparently not a problem on my Factor 5 unit… so I don’t know.

Useless information if there ever was it…

I’m headed back to work. For those wondering why I had a day off yesterday, it was St-Jean Baptiste day… otherwise known as the Quebec National Holiday. To me, it’s just a day off and not a national holiday of any sort… primarily because it’s a political move to promote Quebec sovereignty, which I don’t agree with because we barely function as a province and chances are the supposed “nation” would be an unmitigated failure on its own.

So I’ll be looking forward to Canada Day… a real national holiday. Unfortunately, I work on that day… but I stay home the Monday before…

Ah, what do I care? All I ever do during the day is stay home and catch up on my DVDs. Most of the shops and shit are closed anyway, so what’s the point?

According to rajah.com, TNA scored a 1.03 rating while ECW scored a 0.99. For some reason, this gave TNA cause to celebrate. Now I don’t know about you, but I’d save my celebrations for when my show breaks the 1.2 rating barrier, which I don’t believe TNA has done (or will do for that matter if they continue onward with their current mess of storylines).

According to a message board, Amy Jo Johnson (she of the original pink tights in that kids show using Japanese stock footage and she of that Felicity show) is expecting a child sometime late-fall. Eventually, she’ll be married to… whoever banged her up. Congrats, AJ.

Sadly, people are mourning that a Jason/Amy relationship is unlikely… most likely because JASON IS MARRIED.

After watching ECW, I’ve come to the conclusion that Mike Adama… er, whatever – is generally bland and boring. It seems to me that the wrestling fans are pissed because they replaced Joey Styles with a guy who constantly screws up lines, but the way I saw it, ol’ Mike has nothing remotely redeeming to offer other than he screw ups. Even when he did fuck up Jeff Hardy’s name at the Royal Rumble, I didn’t think he was anything special nor would he last long.

So he’s got a regular gig at ECW, a wrestling show that almost nobody watches… almost as much people watching TNA Impact as they continue to announce new innovative directions and still manage to secure the same 1.2 rating from when they first started. According to Paul Heyman, the reason behind this move is because Vince is so convinced that people hate Adamale (again, whatever) that he is banking on the fact people will watch ECW so see what Mike will screw up next.

It’s sort of like that Britney Spears situation. People are somehow fascinated on the trainwreck of the singer’s life as of late that they’ll buy tabloids to see what and how she fucks up her life next. While I’m sure that kind of audience exists – and no doubt scientists around the world are trying to figure why this kind of moronic audience exists – I sure as hell don’t give two shits about Britney Spears or her personal mindfuck of a life (and I’ve made it quite clear in the Bite) and so I sure as hell don’t give two shits about how Mike Adamama (who cares?) fucks up his lines. After all, I sat through Tony Schiavone and his ability to falsely advertise every night as being “the single greatest night in the history of our sport.”

One thing is certain – as dull and incompetent as Mikey is on the mic, he’s still remotely better than Vince McMahon on the mic. That guy was fucking awful – who made the decision to give that idiot an announcing gig?

Oh yeah…

What the fuck?

And for once, it has nothing to do with excessive amounts of curses.

Continue reading “DTM BLOG Classics #35 – Some Gaming Shlocks”