Author: dtm666

I ramble about things.

PPV Predictions: WWE Backlash 2007

This would be the third Backlash in a row that I’m doing predictions for. Doesn’t really mean much, but let’s get that bit out of the way. This year, Backlash features superstars from RAW, Smackdown, and that other show. In a strange occurance, all matches are title matches. Not sure that means anything, but whatever.

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COMIC REVIEW – Marvel Zombies (2006)

I guess you can consider this a quick comic review, since I haven’t a format to put up a full review. In fact, it’s the first time in years that I’m reviewing a comic book in any form… much less five.

So the crossover series Marvel Zombies vs. Army Of Darkness is coming out soon and I thought I take the time to talk about the original five-part miniseries that was put out some time last year. For those who don’t know, Marvel Zombies is an alternate-universe miniseries in which all the superheroes are turned into flesh-eating zombies. The concept is pretty stupid, but it somehow works. The whole thing is set up so that the heroes are aware of their zombie status, but really can’t do anything about it. It’s certainly different from most zombie stories, where the zombies are depicted as mindless one-track idiots.

Marvel Zombie’s art is gruesome, as it should be. There’s a bit more gore in this story than most Marvel tales of this type and it’s almost appropriate considering what we’re dealing with. Some of the imagery is almost unsettling to a point, but it isn’t anything offensive if you know what you’re getting into. It’s not like anybody’s “little buddy” and spider-balls are hanging out in public.

All in all, this is a fairly entertaining miniseries that’s good for a laugh or two. If at all possible, track this one down (either the issues or a trade paperback if one’s available)

Recommended.

DTM BLOG Classics #29 – London RAW and Other Fine Tales

One of the better shows put out, this week’s RAW saw an hour-long bout between ol’ Shawn and “Useless” John Cena. I’ve enjoyed the match much more than their Mania encounter and was surprised that it would last as long as it did. See, this is the match they should have had at Mania with the right guy winning. The only thing that would have made the win sweeter if it was a title bout and if it featured someone other than John Useless, but you can’t have everything.

All in all, the show, while filled with useless time-wasters not named Cena, was better because of that one single match. Maybe if useless lugs like Orton were sent home more often, we’d have quality products such as this.

Some wrestling site posted a news post about Steve Austin admitting he doesn’t know who Paul London and Brian Kendrick are in an interview. Apparently, a major wrestler not knowing who the (former) tag champs are is news. So let’s recap this ground-breaking interview in traditional style (note Austin responses in Italics)

INTERVIEWER: So, Austin. What do you think of London and Kendrick?

AUSTIN: What?

INTERVIEWER: London and Kendrick.

AUSTIN: What?

INTERVIEWER: The tag-team champs in WWE.

AUSTIN: What?

INTERVIEWER: Never mind.

AUSTIN: What?

Finally, in a bit of unrelated news, long popular message board Rangerboard had recently placed a ban on porn fanfics. Meanwhile, Mystech Rangers (a mindfuck of a “story” if you want to call it that) is still on the boards. So it’s okay for poorly-written incoherent stories with tentacle sex to be posted, but straight up porn stories are inappropriate? Someone explain the logic behind that for me.

No wonder I never go to that place.

Classic Bite Commentary #63 – April 26th, 2007

Welcome to the Bite. Hope every one had a great Easter/Passover holiday a few weeks ago. Mine was fairly good albeit uneventful, but boy was that goat meat great or what? Okay, let’s get on with it. Not much to say this time around; just some pimping, some linking, and some updates on future web projects. Some extended-edition blog reposts might pop up here and there.

Continue reading “Classic Bite Commentary #63 – April 26th, 2007”

RAW (Apr. 23rd, 2007) – RAW Is Wrestling?

One of the better shows put out, RAW saw an hour-long bout between ol’ Shawn and “Useless” John Cena. I’ve enjoyed the match much more than their Mania encounter and was surprised that it would last as long as it did. See, this is the match they should have had at Mania with the right guy winning. The only thing that would have made the win sweeter if it was a title bout and if it featured someone other than John Useless, but you can’t have everything.

All in all, the show, while filled with useless time-wasters not named Cena, was better because of that one single match. Maybe if useless lugs like Orton were sent home more often, we’d have quality products such as this.

DTM BLOG Classics #28 – Even Europe Hates John Cena

So last Monday’s RAW was an okayish show… made possible by the Italian crowd who booed the fuck out of John Useless Cena. Good stuff.

The fashion show was useless, but they got an Italian guy hosting the festivities, so that’s okay.

Generic jobber posing as an Italian fan wins the Intercontinental title from Umaga. Thus rendering both the former titleholder and the title itself a joke. But hey, it’s not like Umaga and the title weren’t a joke already.

All in all – perfectly acceptable show. Can’t wait for the London show.

Oh, by the way, here’s a fairly interesting newsbit from rajah.com:

As WWE continues their European tour they ran into some shear disappointment in Germany. Yesterday’s attendance at the RAW/ECW house show event in Munich’s Olympiahalle was said to be more than disappointing. Tickets did not sell and people did not show! The Olympiahalle had a webcam online yesterday afternoon which showed this disappointment. It doesn’t appear WWE will be appearing in the southern region of Germany again.

WWE disappointed because people didn’t show up? Must have been that goose-stepping stint JBL did a couple years back. Or maybe even Germans don’t give a shit about John Cena.

Good news, though. John Cena is still loved by the American public for reasons beyond my comprehension. And people are warming up to Lashley too.

Lashley might have a chance after all… he could be the “nice” Black Lesnar (since he can’t get angry or even remotely fake it). But it’s time to abandon the dead weight called Cuck Fena.

DVD Review – History Of The WWE Championship (3-Disc Set)

Recently picked up the 3-Disc History set. For those who don’t know, this set contains a bunch of title matches stemming from the WWWF days to the WWF days to the current WWE days. Thankfully, we only get one John Cena match, which means plenty of room for true champions to show their stuff. I’m going to do you folks a favor and give you a quick little review of this thing;

THE GOOD
I dig the presentation on the DVD. There’s even a nice little montage showing off (almost) every (W)WWF/E title change up to the current day, which is a nice touch. Each of the three discs cover specific eras; the first disc cover everything up to the 80s, the second disc 1990s, and the third disc is everything up to today-ish. A good selection of championship matches, with some important stuff featured here.

THE BAD
If there is any real criticism to be had, it’s that there’s no footage of the earliest title change from Sammartino’s first win to anywhere before Billy Graham. Instead, you get a little text blurb describing the event. It’s entirely possible such footage is lost to the annals of time and that’s why they’re not included. Still, it’s something whose omission is felt immensely, even if it might not appeal to the more modern fan.

IS IT WORTH IT?
Overall, it’s a good collection of title matches and it was nice to be able to see Andre the Giant’s only world title win. If you haven’t picked this up, go ahead and do so. In any case, it’s way better than the crap calling itself sports entertainment that on TV these days.

24 and Quebec Terrorists

I found an interview online with one of the writers of the hit show 24. Of particular interest is this quote:

“We are absolutely evenly employing all the bad guys of all nations,” Cassar says. “Some told me, because I’m Canadian, they said, ‘Hey, why are you leaving us out? Why can’t we be the bad guys?’ I’m like, ‘Good idea. Quebec separatists could be the terrorists.’

Actually, if they went along with that, 24 would be my new favorite show.

If you want to read the whole thing, click here.