“If you think the grass is so green on the other side, be my guest. Go ahead. Leave. Main event night four of a buy-one-get-one-free extravaganza and then get released faster than you last in the sack.”
CM Punk, AEW Dynamite – January 5th, 2022
You know… sometimes, it doesn’t take a whole lot of thought.
When word broke that CM Punk was finally getting his Wrestlemania main event, that line immediately popped to mind and the banner for this event soon followed. It just comes together on its own without needing to break my head over these things… and look, I’m not going to begrudge Punk. This was something he wanted and I’m glad that he’s getting that chance as well as the fat paycheck that comes with it. At the same time… how do I not go along with that?
I’m sure some folks will be riled up. Others will more likely not give a shit.
In any event, Wrestlemania took place this past weekend and I suppose I should be thankful that I was able to watch this at home instead of a hospital bed. Admittedly, I wasn’t too excited for this one. You had the main events to look forward to, but everything felt like stuff booked to fill time. Still, it’s that time where everyone puts on their absolute best and… well, we’ll see if they actually went ahead and did that.
NIGHT ONE
Saturday, April 19th, 2025
One noteworthy thing; Fatal Fury is represented in the center of the ring as one of the decals. God bless SNK and their Saudi Arabian overlords… all kidding aside, good for them. Nice to see SNK revive one of their original fighting franchises with a new entry for a new age that also features a couple real-life soccer players from a football team also owned by the same Saudi overlords. Progressive indeed!
“Main Event” Jey Uso defeated World Champion GUNTHER via submission in the opening match of Night 1 to win the title at Survivor Series… because they kept doing the Survivor Series graphics during the replay and I was like, “What?” It’s Wrestlemania, guys. You should be at the top of your game here. Anyway, the match… was fine for the most part. There’s only so much you can do when you’ve already seen this match take place several times beforehand and while some pair-ups are magical, this is not one of them. I did like Jey getting the submission win over GUNTHER by using his own sleeper and causing the champ to tap out; that was a more definitive ending that did more to help Jey’s status as a top-tier main event talent than a simple pinfall would’ve done and most of all, they treated the win like a big deal and it certainly felt that way. So, as far as I’m concerned, mission accomplished. Jey got the win, the title, and the boost in credibility.
And then Jimmy comes out to celebrate with his brother as they both go through the crowd. And then we get commercials and the entrances become more elaborate, almost as though they were designed to waste people’s time… which turned out to be the case. Hey, at least when AEW does four hour PPVs, they’re kind enough to stuff it with great matches and other things. These four hour WWE PPVs are just padded with nothing but shit and watching these live is a waste of time.
The New Day (Xavier Woods and Kofi Kingston) defeated World Tag Champs The War Raiders via Woods pinning one of the Raiders while Kingston held the feet down to win the titles. The New Day and their new heel personas have been refreshing to say the least and while them winning another tag title run seems like “been there, done that,” you really needed something to justify that whole heel turn in the first place, so I’m not entirely against this. That said, however, this match did nothing for me. It was a bit slow, I was largely bored, and the crowd was largely quiet throughout the whole thing… I guess Triple H should like he said in that interview and tell this crowd to fuck off and just be fans… except the fans are bored. Try again, pal.
Jade Cargill defeated Glow “Naomi” Girl. Couple neat spots here and there, but otherwise, a largely meh match. I was just… eh. It got so bad that this eventually became background noise while I was playing catch with the dog or doing some stuff on the blog. Never a good sign.
Jacob Fatu defeated U.S. Champion L.A. Knight to win the title in a match that started a bit slow but then picked up steam and got real good in the end. As much as I dig L.A. Knight, the man did what he could with the belt and really, they needed to give Fatu something to start pushing him towards that next level, so why not a run with the U.S. Title?
El Grand American (a.k.a. Shorty G in a mask) defeated AEW Alumnus Rey Fenix in a match that involved Grand putting a thing in his mask that somehow shattered Rey’s leg when he did a dropkick to the head. I didn’t get it, but hey, for what it’s worth, the match wasn’t bad… it was a bit short, but I’ve seen worse.
WWE Women’s Champion Tiffany Stratton defeated Baby Flair to retain the title… and thank fuck for that. I’m not gonna lie; I didn’t watch the whole thing because I thought a large part of the match was boring. It was the battle of the blondes and I cared about neither one. People seemed to like Stratton and she has some charisma, but I’m not entirely sold what she’s presenting. And of course, I’ve never been much of a Charlotte fan and nothing here has changed that perception much.
And in the main event of Night 1 of the Buy One Get One Free Extravaganza known as Wrestlemania, Seth Rollins defeated CM Punk and Roman Reigns with an assist from Paul Heyman, who low blowed both Punk and Reigns to join up with Seth Rollins in an ending that Stevie Wonder could have seen coming. I mean… yes, Paul Heyman was the Roman Reigns wisemen for that whole run, but then CM Punk did a favor and for months, Heyman owed Punk a favor and that favor turned out to be Heyman being in Punk’s corner at Wrestlemania. And so when the whole deal became whose side is Heyman on, right then and there, you knew that he was going to turn on both those guys and join up with Rollins, who hate both guys because one left the company years ago in bad taste and the other… well, you know.
Look, for what it’s worth, when the turn happened, it got a big reaction. I’m not going to say that it went over like a limp dick. People went along with it. It gives Rollins something new to his character, it gives Heyman something else to do for a chance and possibly give him a new direction that he needed beyond being Roman’s wiseman, which only worked when Roman was the big bad heel. And for what it’s worth, this was the best match on the card with three top tier talents. Yes, Punk held up his end quite fine here and he managed to soak in the moment whenever he could. Whatever your feelings on the man, you can’t help but feel happy for his achieving this and having Living Colour play him out is always a cool moment. Cult Of Personality remains a great song after all these years.
So yeah, Night One is a bit of a bust for me. You had memorable moments in the main event and opening match sandwiching what was a largely lackluster and forgettable show. There’s no critical eye watching this show; this was someone who was simply not feeling the matches on hand and decided that he would use this show as background noise to do other things. If it were any other PPV or PLE, it’d be one thing, but if you’re doing that with Wrestlemania, there’s something wrong. Again, not a bad show, but a largely uneventful one. You can watch the opener and fast forward until the main event without missing a goddamned thing.
Maybe Night Two will be better than this. I mean, it has to be, right?
Addendum
WWE’s acquisition of Lucha Libre AAA
So earlier during the day, it was announced that WWE had acquired Lucha Libre promotion AAA, which is a pretty big deal. AAA is one of the big, major lucha libre promotions in Mexico, home to many great talent who had gone on to become major stars on the international stage. So, yeah, definitely a big coup for WWE – possibly their biggest one since the acquisition of WCW back in 2001, though I’d imagine this cost way more than WCW did back in the day. Apparently, the plan is to keep AAA running as its own thing, but under WWE jurisdiction. I’d imagine this was what they wanted with New Japan during their interactions years ago and honestly… look, I am taking the “wait and see” approach, but I think this is going to be fine. This isn’t the Vince McMahon playbook of buying it and then shuttering it. I think this current WWE regime is making this move to have a foothold in Mexico and I don’t think they want to completely kill the territory by turning it into NXT Mexico or whatever. But again, we’ll see what happens.
Night Two
Sunday, April 20th, 2025
Just as a disclaimer: I’m watching this on a Monday morning, which means I get to skip all the extraneous bullshit between matches. I’d recommend this to anyone who has a life.
Women’s World Champion IYO SKY defeated Bianca Belair and Rhea Ripley in a triple threat match to retain the title, which is the smartest thing they could have done as opposed to going with the obvious directions of either of the other options that would have been more obvious. So, yes, I approve of IYO SKY continuing to reign as Women’s Champion for the foreseeable future because she’s charismatic and highly energetic, she’s a really slick worker, and she’s fun to watch. And yes, this match was great all around. Nobody was slouching here, everyone brought their best to the dance, and it was a good strong start to the night.
That dumb fuck Pat McAfee attempting to say “Cacodemon” in an effort to promote the upcoming DOOM game… I chuckled. Good for him, but otherwise, fuck Pat McAfee.
Drew McIntyre defeated Damien Priest in a Sin City Street Fight sponsored by DOOM The Dark Ages… and not a BFG to be found anywhere. But hey, it’s a great brawl where two big fuckers beat the living fuck out of each other and Drew even got a selfie in. Hey, you know what? This was nice, simple fun that got me entertained. That’s all you really need in life sometimes and I approve.
Dirty Dom defeated IC Champion Bron Breakkkkkkkkkeeerrrrrr, Finn Balor, and Penta in a Fatal Four-Way to win the title, which gained the approval of the crowd – arguably the biggest pop of the night next to one other person that we’ll get to later. It’s a four-way with some fun spots here and there, with Finn and Dom going to blows that may further drive a wedge in this bootleg Judgment Day group that’s overstayed its welcome and needs to be something else. It’s like we’re watching the B-Team over here, guys. Read the room.
Randy Orton defeated TNA World Champion Joe Hendry in an open challenge match that lasted a little over three minutes, but is probably the most high profile three minutes of Joe Hendry’s career, which was more than what I was expecting out of this. Listen, him doing his pose and getting an RKO for his troubles got a bit of a chuckle – no doubt possibly landing a spot in a top 10 RKOs of all time list down the line – and at the very least, he got a little time out of it because I was expecting this to be far more brief, but I’m sure Joe got a hefty payday out of this and hey, losing to a great like Randy Orton is way better than losing to the FUCKING MIZ on a nothing match on RAW.
It’s also worth noting that Joe was a replacement for Kevin Owens, who was scheduled to face Orton until a neck injury sidelined him for an indeterminate amount of time. In any case, whatever, Joe Hendry got his Wrestlemania moment and clearly, the crowd was into his act. Once his TNA run is over and done, I wouldn’t be surprised to see him in WWE sooner than later.
I’ve seen some people complain about how this felt like a waste and it should have been someone like a Miro/Rusev or some other new signing, but the reality is that this was a thing for Randy Orton to do when his scheduled match with KO was cancelled and honestly, if I’m going to bring back a beloved superstar for a new run, I ain’t wasting his first match on a loss to Randy Orton. I’m sorry, but this was a match to fill time and give people their RKO pop. Save the big returns for when they actually mean something and not waste it on something like this. Fuck off over your fake-ass online sympathy that someone else deserved this spot. It doesn’t matter. I’ll take this over another boring ass match that I’ll probably forget later this afternoon, anyway. The person who didn’t get forgettable Mania match #183,388,281 will survive and so will you. Bite me.
And then there was the AJ Styles/Logan Paul match, which I didn’t watch because I had better things to do with my time. But apparently, Logan won, so whatever. Next.
Women’s Intercontinental Champion Lyra Valkyria & the returning Becky Lynch (who was a replacement partner for Bay Ley who was “injured” in a backstage bit) defeated Women’s Tag Team Champions Liv Morgan & Raquel Rodriguez to win the titles. Well, it was only a matter of time before The Man came back and… well, here she is, I suppose. The match was fine, but nothing special. Other than the Becky return, this could have been on RAW or something. Yeah, I’d hate to say it, but other than the opening three-way, this Wrestlemania as a whole has not been the best showcase for the women.
By the way, the next night on RAW, Becky Lynch turned on Lyra during a rematch that saw Liv and Raquel win back the tag titles. Oops.
Steve Austin came out in his ATV and crashed into a barricade. Some woman looked pissed. That’s another lawsuit. He then tries to count fans before giving up. There were attendance numbers being mentioned. I didn’t catch them, but I’ll check on them later. Much later.
John Cena defeated WWE Champion Cody Rhode via low blow and belt shot to win his 17th World title and end Wrestlemania on a downer. The match was mostly straightforward, with only one run-in from that Travis person who tried to slap Cody, but got Crossrhoded for his trouble. Cena grabbed the belt to strike Cody, but Cody caught and struggled to use it on Cena because he’s an idiot babyface and that’s what led to Cena kicking him in the balls and using the belt himself to get the win and the title. This match was fucking atrocious. It was slow, plodding, boring, nothing really happened until the very end. And the booking as a whole… Cody had no problem bashing poor Kevin Owens’ brains in during their title match, but all of a sudden, he can’t bring himself to strike John Cena because he’s a hero or something. This was the guy who kicked you in the balls and left an opening for some asshole celebrity I’ve never heard to slap your earddrum and you’re having doubts as to whether you should get revenge? What kind of stupid ass storytelling is this? It’s wrestling. He wronged you. You wrong him back, beat him, and retain your title. Who booked this shit and why are they allowed to live be employed?
Where’s Armed Anderson when you need him?
I’m not opposed to the idea of John Cena getting another title run – if anything, you pretty much had to have him win in order to justify this heel turn and make it actually mean something in the long term beyond just a twist to his final run. I’m just opposed to how we got there, which comes across as monumentally stupid. Also, of all the people to do a run-in for this match… and by the way, Dwayne was nowhere to be found… so we get this Travis idiot? THAT’s the dumb fuck you decide is going to help John Cena win his 17th title? This is why we can’t just be fans. Because fans want to enjoy things and you give them shit that they can’t enjoy. I would have expected this from the old regime where stupid booking like this was the norm, but this is supposed to the Paul Levesque era where everything is awesome and cinema and shit. This wasn’t cinema. This wasn’t even community theater. This was the drizzling shits and the first huge blemish in the HHH booking era.
But hey… John Cena said that he was going to ruin wrestling, so… mission accomplished, I guess. Maybe he can show up in TNA next and ruin that, too…
On a whole, despite the downer ending, I found Night Two to be a generally better show than Night One with some better matches and some fun moments, but it’s safe to say that overall, this year’s Wrestlemania was a massive step down from the previous one. Granted, there’s only so much you can do to follow up on what was a largely excellent card across the board, but this felt like more of a downer in general. I don’t know; I wasn’t feeling one overall, but I wouldn’t call it outright terrible. Just a swing and a miss. Better luck next year, I suppose.
Later on, I’ll add the RAW After Mania musings, and then the next few weeks of PPV Musings should be nothing but me talking about old WCW PPVs from the 90s or something. I might even toss in a couple old WWF ones for flavor… mostly because they were done months ago and I don’t feel like watching any modern PPVs until maybe Double Or Nothing.
Until then… take care, be safe, and good night.
dtm666 