It’s the Summerfest, kids! Let’s get into it… or not. I don’t know.
I’ll be frank; I didn’t watch the live show because I forgot about it. Yes, act shocked as I completely forgot about the riveting main event of Cody Rhodes vs. Solo Sikoa. However, I did end up watching the replay, which means that I get to fast forward through the extraneous nonsense like concerts, video packages, and comedy bits. Otherwise, I’d be much harsher on this show than I ended up being.
I’m not going to say that this was a bad show because it wasn’t. Nor am I saying that this was uneventful because stuff did happen with some title changes and some pivotal angles pushing stuff forward, but man, this was a slog to get through even in its cut down state… but I am jumping ahead here. Let’s actually get through this quickly.
World Women’s Champion Liv Morgan defeated Rhea Ripley to retain the title with an assist from Dirty Dom in a move that everyone expected would happen and it eventually did, with Dom stopping Rhea from using a chair, but letting Liv kill Rhea with her move on that same chair. The match itself was a thing that happened; nothing great nor bad, maybe a bit longer than it needed to be, but it got us to where we needed to be in this story, so it isn’t a total loss. Unfortunately, interference in this match would set a precedence for the rest of the show… except the next match.
Bron Breakker defeated Intercontinental Champion Sami Zayn in a relatively short match to win the title in dominating fashion. Sami got a couple quick moves in, but this was Bron being a beast and winning the title that some say he should have won at the last PPV, but better late than never, I suppose. I’m just happy that Sami got a decent run with the belt before dropping it to Bron, who’s going to give that belt even more of a boost if the cards are played right.
LA Knight defeated United States Champion Logan Paul to win the title despite interference from Logan’s crown whose name I don’t recall. Why isn’t he in the WWE 2K24 roster? We need more celebrity jobbers in that game to join the Pat McCoffee crew or whatever his face is. Hey, happy to see LA Knight finally get a title in WWE – it’s long overdue – and I’m sure people will be glad to see Logan Paul deprived of WWE gold so he can go back to doing whatever stupid shit he usually does, but the match was just kinda, sorta there. It wasn’t bad or anything; it was just a thing that exists and I’m just waiting for the finish. Again, this is setting a precedent for the future of this show.
Nia Jax defeated WWE Women’s Champion Bay Ley with an assist from MiTB winner Tiffy Time to win the title. The run-ins aren’t helping this show; they really aren’t. Bay Ley hitting that powerbomb on Nia is a nice feat of strength that nobody is going to remember and Tiffany Stratton’s run-in to help Nia win the title annoyed more than it did anger me. The match itself… listen, I’m sure both ladies got paid real well and that’s most important, right? Nia winning the title… eh, I’m largely ambivalent over it. Greatest moment of her career, as some people claim? Absolutely not, especially in a world where “MY HOLE” exists.
Drew McIntyre defeated Collision Manchild Punk in a grudge match with Seth Rollins as the special referee. This is Punk’s first televised singles match in WWE and he loses. Punk is largely an asshole in this match and Drew was the guy who told the truth and was constantly getting fucked over by Punk, so it’s good to see Drew finally get his revenge on that piece of shit Phil, who probably would’ve won the match had he not been a dick to Seth and his stupid outfits. That way, he wouldn’t have been punted in the balls by Drew, which was what helped in Drew getting the win. They were trying to go for that Summerslam 97 vibe – Punk was even wearing Bret Hart colors to sort of hammer that point in. Sadly, Punk is no Bret Hart, Drew is no Undertaker, and Seth Rollins’ puffy outfit thing is almost as bad as Shawn Michaels’ bicycle shorts. So now that Punk lost, Drew can move on to bigger and better things… or he can take the piss out of Phil and start screwing HIM out of big wins for a change. That’s not being a heel; that’s being properly revenged.
Now, all kidding aside, this was the first legitimately good match I’ve come across on this show. Punk looked fine for someone who hasn’t wrestled a full match in a good long while (he wrestled a couple house shows late last year if I recall correctly) and Drew continues to be a monster of a big man that I wish they would put him back in a big title picture again. There’s more to this Drew/Punk/Seth story that they can work with here and I’m actually somewhat into it, so let’s see where this goes.
GUNTHER defeated World Champion Damien Priest via dastardly betrayal of Judgment Day stablemate Finn Balor into a sleeper submission to win the title. Yeah, so Priest hit his South of Heaven finish on Gunther, did an incredibly ridiculous roll-up sequence to pin the guy close to the ropes so that Finn could play his part and put Gunther’s leg on the ropes to stab Priest in the back. I do like the bit where Priest watches the replay to see what happens and immediately goes after Finn, which took his focus off Gunther, allowing the Ring General to take advantage and trap Priest in the submission, leaving the now-former champ to pass out and give Gunther his first World title in WWE (NXT UK title doesn’t count.) Again, another match ending in interference is getting a bit grating at this point and it did diminish Gunther’s title win somewhat since the match was less about that and more about the implosion of the judgment day. Finish aside, however, this was a fucking great match between two big fuckers beating the ever loving fuck out of each other. All credit to Priest, who did more to elevate the stock of this World title than most people figured he would, and never let it be said that he didn’t go down putting on one of his best performances thus far. Gunther, on the other hand, continues to be this monster machine whose work is impeccable and whose presence is commanding. Here’s hoping he gets a good World title run going forward because that bastard deserves it.
In the main event of Summerslam – the biggest party of the summer – WWE Undisputed Champion Cody Rhodes defeated Solo Sikoa in a Bloodline Rules match to retain the title. Let’s not beat around the bush here; this was about 20-25 minutes of waiting for the eventual interference of other Bloodline members and babyfaces before we get the eventual return of Roman Reigns, who wastes no time in taking down this poser Solo Sikoa to allow Cody to hit his finish and retain the title. And for what it’s worth, Roman’s return was a highlight and something that made all that waiting worthwhile. The rest of the match, however, was a complete and utter waste of fucking time. Solo Sikoa never came across as a credible main event threat and watching this match was like watching a direct-to-video sequel to a popular movie where they replaced the big star with some dude. And when I see all the guys running interference in this match – Kevin Owens, Randy Orton, the Guerillas of Destiny, Jacob Fatu (who looked to have hurt his leg during a table drop) – I’m thinking all of these guys would’ve been better Summerslam main events than Solo Sikoa. Hell, I’d even give JEY USO a shot at Cody and it would’ve felt like a bigger deal; at least, the guy is fucking over with the crowd these days.
But instead, we get this Solo guy… who works fine as a heavy and a bodyguard… but as a main event challenger for the WWE title, he doesn’t do it for him. He has some moves, but he doesn’t have the aura or the mystique. He’s just some dude in a fancy suit re-enacting some scenes from better material and doing nothing to convince me that he’s a credible threat to Cody. Hell, even the return of Arn Anderson didn’t inspire much confidence since he never once mentioned his Glock, which shows how much he thinks of Solo as a threat to Cody. Honestly, you would’ve been better off cutting this down to five minutes of an actual match before Solo decides “Fuck it, send in the troops.” At least, we’d skip ahead to the part people really want to see much faster.
Like I said, Roman’s return felt like a big deal, as it should. But everything before that match… fuck it. Waste of time.
And that was Summerslam. Stuff happened on the show that moved things forward, there were a couple good matches on there worth checking out, and the return of Roman Reigns to a hero’s welcome is the kind of reception that someone wishes they could have acheived with Roman ages ago, but the rest of the show was just kinda, sorta there. And the last thing I want is through four hours of kinda, sorta there. I’d feel sorry for the poor sods who sat through a THREE HOUR pre-show before watching the main show. That comes across as pretty stupid.
Anyway, I don’t know what’s coming up next… maybe some old PPVs from ages past. Not sure if I’ll be watching All In any time soon, but I’ve got other stuff in the works as far PPV Musings go, so it’s not a total loss.
Later.
dtm666 