So you’ve heard of the Atari 7800, right? The console that never made it anywhere because people were too busy playing Nintendo? The console with a small library of 7800 games that was also compatible with a large number of 2600 games?
Yeah, that’s the one.
Ever hear of this game called Ninja Golf? The game where you assume a role of a ninja playing golf, but instead of a golf cart, you have to run through hordes of enemy ninjas, sharks, birds, and other dangerous creatures? A title considered by many game players to be one of the Atari 7800’s finest games ever made?
What?! You’ve never heard of Ninja Golf? Have you no honor? Do you not realize your dishonorable conduct by acknowledging your ignorance of this ancient sport?
Sit then and listen, as I bestow upon the secrets of Ninja Golf and why you should play it. For it may be the only way to restore the honor you never had…
STORY: Apparently, to be a true ninja master, you have to survival several holes of golf, considered to be the most difficult test. Failure results in dishonor to your family and yourself. Never has something so simple sounded so epic as it does here. It’s perhaps the finest sports story that can never be told in film, but only on the Atari 7800 ProSystem. Bravo, Atari. Bravo. 10/10
GRAPHICS: The graphics in Ninja Golf are nothing short of amazing. While it lacks the fine polish of some of Nintendo’s later releases around the same time, it could easily fit in with some of the earlier NES launch titles. The backgrounds are lush and vibrant, the running animation on the ninja is smooth and fluent, the intermission screens are fantastic by Atari standards, and there’s very little slowdown when the action gets cluttered. For the most part, Ninja Golf looks the part and that’s fine by me in this regard. 10/10
SOUND: As is the case with all 7800 games, the sound in Ninja Golf is not of high quality, although it’s actually better than most games on the system. While the various golf swings, attacks, and collisions sound pretty fantastic, the occasional music cues are pretty bad. Only the ninja-sounding music is bearable; the rest isn’t so much. Fortunately, a good majority of the game lacks music, so there’s your saving grace. 9/10
GAMEPLAY: The whole premise behind Ninja Golf is simply ingenious. You begin each stage by putting your ball, pushing the button at the right time according to the little map below. The farther you drive your ball, the farther you’ll have to go. After driving your ball, however, we begin the main action sequences, as you have to get past a variety of foes to reach your ball. Once you reach the green, your skills are put to the test as you face off against a fierce fire-breathing dragon. Defeat him and you move on to the next hole… but not before a quick look at your scorecard.
Ninja Golf provides a really nice meshing of the two styles of gameplay. While the golf portions is lacking in depth, the simplicity of the system actually works. The action portions are also well done, with a variety of ninjas, gophers, and other creatures present to obstruct your way. And yes, the environment changes as you traverse through sandy bunkers, green grass, and water hazards to drive that ball towards the green. The boss fights are done in a third-person perspective as your ninja faces the dragon. A nice blend of modes for the most part and controls seem to work great in this game, so no real complaints. 10/10
CHALLENGE: All 7800 games have the ability to configure your level of difficulty and Ninja Golf is no exception, with four skill settings ranging from easy to kamikaze (really hard). For the most part, the game boasts the right balance of difficulty. It starts off easy enough and gets more difficult as you progress through the dreaded nine holes of Ninja Golf. It can get a little frustrating, as enemies have a tendency to gang up on you and life-restoration items are few and between. It’s also one of those games where you have no continues. 9/10
REPLAY VALUE: Ninja Golf is one of those games that offers little in terms of options and yet is a ridiculously fun game you’d want to play again and again because of its content and subject matter. The game has replay based on its premise alone. 10/10
OVERALL: If you haven’t played Ninja Golf yet, you shame your family and yourself with lifelong dishonor. But seriously, all kidding aside, Ninja Golf really is a fun and original game that combines the best aspects of ninja warfare with the best elements of golf. It is perhaps the single most impressive video game in the Atari 7800 library that isn’t based on an arcade game or available on other consoles. With splendid animation, superb gameplay, and a unique concept, Ninja Golf could have been a franchise today if Atari had any clue, but alas, it’s fated to be nothing more than a shining gem of a console nobody ever played.
And that is a grave dishonor indeed.
So yeah, do yourself a favor; get an Atari 7800 and GET THIS GAME. It is absolute greatness. 10/10
dtm666 