Author: dtm666

I ramble about things.

Captain Wesley – Misconceptions and Sequels… Oh Dear God, No!

So a few months back, I had written this short little non-comedic piece called The Adventures of Captain Wesley Crusher. In simpler terms, a terrible event occurs in which wizkid Wesley Crusher, still in his child genius stage as depicted in the first season of Next Gen, is promoted to captain. Hilarity ensures, right?

Two reviews are posted and both of them tell me the same thing; that I wrote the story as is because I hate Wesley Crusher. Now, I’ve cleared things up with said reviewers in a calm, polite manner since their reviews were written in a calm, honest, and polite manner. But since there are obviously those who are going to assume the same thing, I felt the need to address the story on a public forum… namely mine.

Two things need to be cleared up: first off, I have no ill will towards the Wesley Crusher character. Sure, I thought he was a snotty child genius character, but over time, he evolved into a young officer-in-training who earned his stripes, got a fair chance to contribute as an officer, and eventually managed to forge his own destiny. He’s not my favorite character, but he’s not exactly number 1 on my death list, either.

Another thing is that I had written in the disclaimer that characters wouldn’t portrayed the same way as they are in the show. It’s a necessity since you couldn’t overexaggerate the more mature Wesley Crusher of the latter days prior to his departure, but his early-first season role as the child genius was perfect fodder. The ending was written that way because it had to be for a happy ending. Either that or he died, and I didn’t want to kill him. Now would I have done that if I hated the character? No, but then if I hated the character, I wouldn’t have written about him, much less made a parody of him.

And that’s my two cents. Hopefully this clears up some misconceptions you might have about the story. And now that we got that out of the way, anyone who thinks Captain Wesley is a story that will go away into obscurity… well, think again. For I’m in the planning stages (with a friend) to write another epic master

That’s right, kids. A sequel.

There are a couple of changes made in terms of the treatment of characters. Unlike the first “epic” tale, this takes place a couple years later when Wesley is a little more mature and responsible. This means all the bad jokes and ugly portrayals of the first story is out, replacing it with proper narrative (don’t get too comfortable – some bad portrayals have leaked through the shields). The other change is that the story will have a darker slant to it and no doubt the challenges will put our Acting Ensign to the test.

Now would I be writing a serious story about a guy I hate?

GameFAQs Review – Mortal Kombat (Arcade)

Ah, the original Mortal Kombat arcade game. Released during the height of Street Fighter II’s increasing popularity, Mortal Kombat contained a few elements different from all the other fighters of the time, such as digitized actors and backgrounds, blood and gore, and a block button. The result is the start of one of the most popular video game franchises in the 1990s, but beneath all the hooplah concerning the violence and all that stuff, does a good game lie within?

Well… you have to start somewhere, right?

Continue reading “GameFAQs Review – Mortal Kombat (Arcade)”

GameFAQs Review – Capcom Fighting Evolution (Xbox)

Capcom Fighting Evolution is a mixed bag. You either love it or hate it because of what it is: another recycling job disguised as a brand new game. All things considered, I had hesitated to pick this one when I saw it going for full price as opposed to being a budget title, but since the local EBGames had dropped the price on this title, I picked it up anyway despite all the negative press behind it and tried it out for myself. Is it really as bad as they say?

Continue reading “GameFAQs Review – Capcom Fighting Evolution (Xbox)”

Saturday Night's Main Event Dead Last In The Ratings!

According to insidepulse.com, WWE’s latest edition of Saturday Night’s Main Event was dead last in the national TV ratings, earning a 2.65.

When approached about the news, the Orange Goblin had to say: “Well, you know somethin’, brutha? It shows that John Cena isn’t ready for the main event, dude! The main event should have been me wrestling Edge for the title and winning it again for the umpteenth time, jack! And the rest of the card would have been replays of my daughter’s cool video for the whole night, brutha! So whachagonnado, brutha?!”

Note that the above quote isn’t true. For the original story, click here.

Not Like The Rest Of Us… Also Weed

Browsing through WWE.com, I couldn’t help but comment on a small bit written by Jim Ross in his recent Superstar-Of-The-Week column:

Randy Orton had a fine Vengeance and RAW, but his leering at Hulk’s daughter disqualified young, master Orton. Will Orton never learn? Doesn’t Randall watch VH 1’s Hogan Knows Best like the rest of us?

Now I don’t know about you, but last time I checked, the rest of us that I know of weren’t watching Hulk Hogan’s TV show. Which probably means that by not doing so, my respect for Randy Orton has gone up. Mind you, that isn’t saying much.

Also, RVD got caught for carrying weed, eh? Can’t say I’m surprised. So now as a result of their Wellness Policy, WWE has made it so RVD loses both his shiny belts; one of Mr. Copeland and the other to Mr. Show. On top of that, he gets suspended for thirty days. Oh yeah, Sabu was also busted too.

Could the lack of these two marquee performers do in ECW for good? Not really. After all, Vince is in control now so chances are he’ll screw up something with or without them along the way. Never did the phrase “going up in smoke” seem more appropriate than it does now.

I’ll have more thoughts in the upcoming Bite commentary, which should be up sometime next week.

Classic Bite Commentary #51 – June 23, 2006

Look at that. I actually got another one up two weeks later. Of course, this is already breaking the unwritten rules associated with this revived commentary, but that’s okay. It just means I have more to say and comment on this month. If anyone has a problem with that, please push that back button now and get the hell out of here… or do something revolutionary and read my words for they shall set you free… or something.

Now, there is a bit of a confession lying between these words: there isn’t any cemented intention of making this an ongoing deal. Like I said, my hopes is to get one in once a month, but with my hecticly jumbled schedule, I’m not quite sure if I can even fit that in. I’m having hard times just posting on the blog. Rest assured that I’ll certainly have a new commentary next month for all three people reading this thing right now.

Continue reading “Classic Bite Commentary #51 – June 23, 2006”

COMIC REVIEW – Spider-Man: Torment (1990)

Todd McFarlane made a name for himself drawing Spider-Man in a fresh take that remains somewhat to this day. After a long stint on Amazing Spider-Man, Todd wanted to stretch his limbs and give this writing thing a shot. So Marvel gave the dude his own (adjectiveless) Spider-Man book and I’ll never forget the cover of that first issue; Spidey in that one pose amid a background of webbing, which came in either metallic silver, metallic bronze, or full-color varieties. The full-color one (pictured) was kinda lame, but the silver and bronze variants were pretty cool and perfectly matched the tone of the book’s first major arc; a five-issue story called Torment.

Anyone familiar with McFarlane’s art should know what to expect; lots of nice little setpieces that sometimes gets a bit chaotic for its own good compounded with a lot of faces that look to have been molded from Playdoh. It’s an acquired taste and a style that fit the time it was produced in. Sadly, the same can be said for the story; serviceable for the time, but not something that holds up over time. A shame too, because the premise is actually interesting, with Spider-Man having to deal with an infection of sorts, as well as a more primal Lizard compared to what had been presented before and another sinister force with ties to an old foe who has left this proverbial plane of existence. Although to be fair, I do like the little moments between Peter and MJ; those are nice.

One thing is for certain; Torment would be a learning curve for McFarlane, who would go on to produce the comic series Spawn and essentially create a merchandising empire for himself. Not one of the guy’s best efforts and in terms of quality Spider-Man stories, there are certainly better ones, but for a pilot effort, it got the table set and is certainly worth a read as a period piece.